Kids taking all my money out of my bank account

[Momtrac83]

Every month when I get paid my universal credit and pip. The adult take all my money out of my bank account without my permission.yes buy food with most of it but it leaves with nothing to pay bills. I admit I'm an alcoholic I do buy alcohol with some of it but i don't let them go hungry or without the things they need. Do they have a right to take the money?

Well said.

This is really sad. It sounds like your adult child is doing everything they can to intervene and stop you using your money to buy alcohol.

I do feel quite worried for your 3 year old. You’ve had really good advice from people here, pls take it

@Wonnle why don't you think this is real?

Has anyone considered the OP doesn't want and had no interest in getting help?

Seems to me the post is just whinging cos her supply has been cut off.. not thoughts for the 3 year old or the grown sibling, just herself.

Best thing the older sibling could do is take that toddler and run for the hills!

It would be good if the OP got back to us. Can mumsnet do anything? Is there any way they can help this family's crisis?

I know it's not 'good form' but what's the OPs other thread like @Redebs?

@Yerroblemom1923 - "Can mumsnet do anything?"

Like what????? Is Mumsnet the fourth emergency service?

@CharlottenBurger I have no idea, that's why I asked. I don't know what info they hold about us I've been on here years and can't remember what details I provided signing up. Maybe if they gave an email address or something....I honestly don't know, daft question, clearly.

I can't begin to imagine the legal trouble they could get in, even if any of the story is true, which we don't know. Lots of sympathy vampires come on here.

It's pretty obviously the poster who was asking for advice as to how to change her username yesterday. Previous threads indicate that the 3 year old is mostly being looked after by her father (who is no longer in a relationship with the OP) and that the OP has very limited, mostly supervised, access.

You are out of control tho, you're an alcoholic.

Thank you so much for updating with this….. It’s really helped provide a wider more reassuring picture xx

not sure its the same poster never mentioned living with adult dc and im sure they were only in their twenties

I'm sure it isn't.
The style of writing is very different and the family circumstances are also different.
There is no mention of a ten year old on this thread, either.

It can't be. The poster from yesterday is only 26.
She can't possibly have adult children.

@Wonnle well that’s the thing. You never know what’s real or not on here. I wouldn’t be surprised though, people really do live some fucked lives

It is kind of unclear information, are you saying your adult kids take money out of your bank account, I guess i would have a few questions, how do they have access to the bank account and then what do they with the money when they take it. Do they pay the bills with the money or what do they with it. It seems like since you mentioned you buy drink with it, is it acknowledged in your family that you overspend on alcohol to your detriment or what.

It's possible that it's not the same person. But that poster had given various ages, children's ages, and relationship statuses over different threads. And there's no indication here of how old the 'adults' are. It could be the same person, just trying to disguise themselves by changing some details. It might not be. Either way, I would take what they say about home circumstances with a pinch of salt.

Got thrown of your own thread hey?

Even the ops calpol story doesn’t make sense.

She says she needed calpol and bin bags. Then that her adult child gave her change and wanted a receipt.

So they did have the money to get what she wanted (calpol and bin bags) and handed it over. I simply don’t believe the adult child saw their sibling needed calpol but only handed enough money over for bin bags.

So it’s a non issue. Child needed calpol. Child got calpol. I think the Op means ‘I made up reasons to get money, but because they wanted a receipt I had to buy what I said I was buying’

and I would also bet Op gave control to adult child when they were sober. And last night was having a tantrum because they couldn’t get alcohol last night.

Throw in ‘I couldn’t even eat a sandwich and my poor toddler was sick with no calpol and I am financially abused’ was attempt to get people to agree with their tantrum.

I really feel for the children. All of them. Imagine having to sort your mothers money out because she spends it all on booze and then has hissy fits when they can’t have booze.

Hey wisher, you are quoting me. Re it not being her “fault”, I was trying to say that alcohol can do this to anyone, we all run the risk if we start drinking too much (ie it’s not a disease). I didn’t mean that it’s not her “responsibility” to act now. Since it absolutely is her responsibility.

I am also the daughter of an alcoholic. My mother lies, takes no responsibility, is a victim. Ruined my life. I’m in my 50s and only beginning to feel ok. She’s in her 80s and still an alcoholic. I no longer see her, my life is much better with her not in it. OP do you know what you are doing to your kids? Do you really want this? No one wins here. Their sympathy will run out, as it has for me and for @wisherwood. Go and see your gp, there is help out there.

You sound drunk in these posts.

You also come across as ridiculous, you can eat a sandwich without butter. You have the important components such as the bread and filling! You’re on a low income and state you can’t afford bin bags…you can go without butter if it means your family can eat. In context, butter is not a priority is it?

it sounds like your older children are staging an intervention to prevent you from harming yourself or the younger children

I think you need to start being honest about the impact of your alcoholism. Your adult child doesn’t trust you for a reason. What happened before? They’re clearly checking if you’re buying alcohol, I mean you admit there’s no money left over to pay the bills but you also spend some money on alcohol? Good parents do not prioritise alcohol over BILLS. Have you left your family without before? It really does seem like your children are trying to establish boundaries with you to save your life, and that you’re angry about the consequences of your previous actions