The freedom thread ( continued ) Riding the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life!

[ChampooPapi]

Adm1010

Hello all

This is a thread for people who have decided that life is much better without alcohol!🤩 These threads were started by @Drybird, and they have changed the lives of many people.

Some posters on these threads have been sober for a long time, and some are only just starting. We are a very friendly and inclusive bunch and we are always excited when someone new joins the thread. The only thing we ask is that our posters have given up alcohol completely. Talk of moderation can be triggering for some people, so this thread is not the right place for that (there are other moderation threads🙂).

We are a supportive welcoming bunch. No question is ever to “ silly “ and their is generally someone around if you are struggling

So just come here to chat or vent or check in . Whatever you need as you ride the rollercoaster of an alcohol free life smile

Thank you to @Adm1010 for hosting the last thread 💜

And here’s to the next 40 pages grin

Morning all. Have a good day

Morning everyone, today is day 11 for me.can already see positive changes, my skin looks better, eyes clear - like a healthy Labrador basically! I don't think I have a wet nose ...

A couple of weeks in is dangerous territory for me because it's the point I start to forget the last terrible hangover that made me swear to start AF again, and I feel good so ironically decide to poison myself. NO! not this time Satan.

Morning campers.

Woke up after long sleep and can't remember if I got up in the night or not!
Need to type up big proposal for new beauty product launching this summer. Normally would have needed wine for creative process. Feeling good atm.
Have a good day all.

Congratulations @SavBbunny, an exciting and productive weekend and week ahead 🙌

My phone is being very unreliable at the moment, think it's rammed full of apps assignment documents and malfunctioning. I just noticed my last post was repeated, I had to rewrite the thing a few times because my blasted phone kept having funny turns 🙄

@spacehardware morning , definitely not this time! Push on, post one month the benefits really start to show and it does get a lot easier as your beginning to recondition your mind and body generally. I have a habit of getting complacent around month 2/3 again. Which is crazy after so much sober time under the belt

Hello all I’m having a bit of a hard time. I had been feeling SO good this year but this last month hasn’t been so great. I know why - we had covid in the house and although none of us were very ill it made me very behind with work (kids off school) so that’s stressful. On top of that we’re just starting some building works and we’ve been looking after and elderly family member. It’s all just a bit too much for me at the moment.

I’m a very energetic person usually (and also really upbeat) and I have pretty good coping mechanisms these days but I’m just so so so tired and struggling to find joy in life at the moment.

Sorry to complain, I know this is just “normal” when you have small kids and jobs etc., and there’s nothing especially awful about my life at the moment but I’m just struggling with my feelings.

Mornings are the worst, I just wake with a sense of dread about the day ahead. Then I perk up during work hours (I love my job) but the afternoons are just so relentless as well with needy kids, housework etc, and then the next day it all starts again.

It just all feels a bit relentless at the moment. I know it will pass (and I’m really proud for not drinking or smoking which is what I would have done before) but fuck me, life is hard work sometimes.

Sorry again for the rant and I promise to return to my usual cheery self soon…

@BunniesBunniesBunnies sorry it's tough for you. I totally get that feeling of dread in the mornings . Caring for an elderly relative is draining and gives you extra 'guilt' if you feel you aren't doing enough. Well done for keeping going.
@ChampooPapi my nursing experience has always been on medical wards with a lof time spent with stoke patients. I also spent some time on a ward for 'bed blockers' ---- dreadful term of phrase I know. A lot of the patients were alcohol/drug dependant people with no living accomodation to return to. I cringed at times when some of my fellow colleagues were less than kind as 'they brought it on themselves'.
There but for the grace of God go I !
Day 6 for me and I was twitching last night but sat with my tonic and fake gin and got through it. I'm finding it difficult to leave my house at the moment and would really like to change stuff in my life but that's a whole new subject. Have a short break coming up at Easter in a caravan where I'm hoping the sunny weather returns and I can sit out in an open space where I don't know anyone and don't have to 'people'!
It will be the very 1st time I will have spent time in the touring caravan without alcohol. It will be tough.
Keep going everyone!

@BunniesBunniesBunnies I'm sorry to hear you're feeling like that. You're allowed to moan if you want to, it's a hell of a lot you've got on. The mountain of domestic responsibility can be overwhelming when you're on an even keel but then something else comes along and tips the balance in the wrong direction. No wonder you are feeling swamped.
Here's the practical bit; Are you managing to run at all? I'm always grateful to you for helping me get into it. A combination of running and yoga keeps me sane.Can you ask anyone for help? Is your partner supportive?
Big hug for you 🤗

@BunniesBunniesBunnies

Chin up girl. You are lead bunny! I put on music. I imagine if you had a drink now you would feel like shit?
I had a blip last week, I nearly brought it up.
I sweated it out and it was a lesson and a half.
Carering was the hardest job i ever did. I get to fanny around with beauty kit now but I am an orphan.
Can you buy yourself some expensive fruit for a sugar hit? It works for me.

Thanks guys for allowing me to moan.
@Drybird2020 it’s exactly like you say. It’s such a delicate balance and if only one small thing goes wrong the balance is tipped in the wrong direction and it’s all too much.

My partner is amazing and so supportive (practically as well as emotionally) but he is working extremely long hours at the moment (not his fault and not forever - hopefully!) so most of the childcare and house stuff falls to me. He does what he can but often only comes home when the kids are in bed, it’s been exhausting. As I said his work should calm down soon but it’s been hard and I’m struggling not to feel resentful (even though it’s not his fault).

I am still running a bit, not as much as before but I do go a few times a week. This is basically what keeps me sane. Without the running I’d be drunk right now I’m sure😂😂😂 I’m really glad running and yoga is helping you too. I only wish I had discovered the benefits of exercise and being outdoors sooner!

Thanks so much for your kindness both, it helps a lot just to say it out loud.

@SavBbunny funny you mention music as I do get a lot from that! And I did treat myself to some mango actually which is so expensive but I love it🤩

I’m sorry you were a carer too and that you have lost your parents. I can’t imagine what that’s like. You have been through a lot.

Totally unrelated but can I ask a beauty product question as you’re the expert😂 I wear BB cream, usually with moisturiser, but I’ve now started wearing it with Nivea factor 50 as I really need the SPF! Should I still moisturise underneath or is sun cream and bb cream enough? Sorry for shamelessly asking for beauty advice on this thread!

@BunniesBunniesBunnies

Ask away.

Moisturiser comes first as it should be carried into the skin by its active ingredients. Sun block is the next as it is a barrier product. BB is make up so final layer.
Just a warning do not use anti aging ingredients until you are in your mid thirties or beyond. A good hydrator and sun protection will be fine.
Powerful creams used too soon cause acne and pore slacking.

Thanks @SavBbunny it’s kind of you to reply!

Hi bunnies so sorry to hear that you are in overwhelm. Being in that sandwich generation is so hard. I had watched older people (usually women) go through it but could never have fathomed how difficult it was until I experienced it.

Time for some self care. Even if it's for 5 minutes at a time. I had a whole day of movement on Sunday, like yoga but not yoga. I was hosting so felt like it was a(nother) working day but I wasn't teaching so I got to be on the other end and it was glorious. I realised how important it is to fill up our own bucket when most of life is draining our reserves.

Here to listen and to hold your hand and maybe massage your forehead. As you look after everyone else we are virtually looking after you. 💛

@BunniesBunniesBunnies even if you are ‘ranting’ you do it eloquently! Sorry things are tough right now but don’t forget if you’ve had Covid in the house post viral fatigue may be a factor in all this. Thank you for being so open about the downs as well as the ups - it’s easy to read posts (especially from long term soberistas) and believe all is well in their world. I hope posting and hearing what others have to say helps in some way.
Take care and never apologise for posting honestly 💐

@Breathmiller your Sunday of movement sounds lovely! I do really try with self care but sometimes there just aren’t enough hours in the day, and with my partner working such long hours I’m often with the kids. I have a swim booked tonight though and I shall be going whatever happens!!!

Thank you for your kind words @AlloftheTime. It’s definitely not all rainbows and sunshine in my life at all times😂😂😂

Even though my life has much improved since I quit drinking, it’s still absolute chaos a lot of the time! Behind with work, house a mess, always feeling guilty for not spending enough time with the children/at work/on the home etc etc etc etc

For me it’s not the case that sobriety magically makes my life perfect, BUT not drinking does make it sooo much easier to cope with the chaos.

But yeah sorry if I appear to project my life is perfect, it’s definitely not😂😂😂

Thanks everyone for kind words and advice it means a lot xxx

@BunniesBunniesBunnies I definitely didn’t mean to imply perfection but just remember in my very early days here I felt an absolute mess and some of you sounded so ‘sorted’
My projection at the time I’m sure and also a lack of acknowledgment about what I had been through and overcome.

Every milestone I achieve is in part down to having found you all here when I did
To anyone struggling practise self care count the days or hours but keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Day 13 AF. Had some bloods redone 9 days after been AF and Alt has risen by 3 to 43 in 2 weeks. Also ultrasound shows fatty liver. So now have to have a barrage of other bloods to determine how bad it is. I'm so worried just need a bit of positivity right now. Not only that but there's something wrong with my womb too which I'm been referred for.

Hi everyone, this looks like the kind of thread I could do with joining!

I've been AF for just over a month now. Instigated by noticing that I had some jaundice and stomach bloat, which I've had before but which would usually just disappear after a few days AF. This time... well, it didn't. So I'm currently undergoing various scans, bloods etc to ascertain exactly what the problem is (or rather, exactly how bad the problem is).

So far I've been told I probably have alcoholic hepatitis, and that it's unlikely to have developed into cirrhosis but they can't get a clear answer yet from the scan as my liver is too inflamed. I have another scan in a few weeks time so fingers crossed.

I'm feeling fine with the mental aspect of not drinking, but I do wish I could see some physical benefits from it! I have edema/water retention (not actual ascites apparently?) which means I've not lost any weight despite cutting out about 1100 calories per day in cider and eating ridiculously healthily! Also just generally feeling bleurgh - the bloods identified anaemia and invasive strep A so I'm on meds for them as well as diuretics for the edema. Plus have a shitty cough and piles (sorry for TMI haha)!

I know it's asking too much of my poor body to suddenly become healthy after a few weeks of being AF and clean living, but I do wish I could see some improvements soon!

Lovely to join this thread and all of you

Hi! @SAB10 and welcome. I have recently (re)joined and am beneffiting from the great support. I'm not straying too far from the thread at the moment as I'm a bit wobbly and don't really talk to anyone else.
Sorry you are suffering from physical side effects of alcohol. Hope things gradually improve. You are in good company here.

bunnies yes, i hear you. It's so hard to fit in self care when we seem to come way down the caring list. Enjoy every single moment of your swim tonight.

I have worked nearly every day in March in one capacity or another, many of these 12 hour days. I am pooped. But, they end is in sight and I have 2 weeks off from tomorrow. (Well, I say off, running your own business always requires a bit of checking in). I am soooo in need of it.

When i finish tomorrow I drive 2 hours to go see my mum in her nursing home. I haven't seen her since Christmas and she has had covid since then so I believe gone quite downhill. But, I am looking forward to seeing her. Covid in her home meant it has been shut to visitors for most of the year. I have to admit to feeling a little nervous about what I may be faced with. But, you know? That would have been a time that I would have driven the 2 hours home tomorrow night and drowned myself in wine. Especially because Saturday is the first day of my holidays and I have deliberately made no plans. I certainly haven't planned a hangover which would have been my plan of old. It really does not even appeal anymore. At all. I'm going to enjoy doing nothing on Saturday. Without a hangover!

beaches I'm so sorry you have all these health worries at the moment. I do hope they get to the bottom of things and you can start to get the treatment if any that you need. I have had a few health issues the last few years and kept thinking how unfair it was as I had stopped drinking so surely I should have been a picture of health! But, they have passed and I absolutely know that not one of these health issues would have been helped by drinking. I hung onto that thought when things looked a bit bleak.

Keep talking it out on here. One of the great things about this thread is it isn't just to talk about being sober. I suppose the conversand support leaks out to everything in our lives purely because not drinking leaks out and affects the whole of our lives.

@SAB10
Welcome. You sound poorly my duck.
I had an inflamed liver. 165, now 125. 82 days AF.
I am obese and waiting for surgery as my condition caused a blindness scare. If I get diabetes I am fecked.
Post and ask questions.

Welcome Sab10
You are in the right place. Do keep posting and i do hope you start to see and feel a glimmer of change soon. I work as a therapist and I have been working with a client for a little while now. He felt pretty bleak for one reason and another. He said last night that he feels that there is the "potential" to see himself improving. It gives him hope that there is the a chance of transformation. Now, i can see a difference in him and so can his wife. And he sees a difference when he's with me. But, he had said he was falling back into gloom at home. But, that glimmer of "potential" he ssid that he now has is quite wonderful.

Perhaps you can sense the potential for things to get better? Even if it's just because you have posted here.

Sending positive vibes to @SAB10 and @BeachesandIcecream!

@AlloftheTime your post sounds familiar I was a right mess when I joined this thread! @Drybird2020 and some lovely others gently put me back together😂😂😂

@Breathmiller I hope you enjoy your much deserved break!