Alcohol Explained. Day one

[onedayiwillflyaway1]

Hello,
I'm a long time lurker and long time drinker. I've had the day off work today and after another boozy night and my anxiety this morning this lead me to have a beer for hair of the dog. I suddenly realised this is heading only one way, so I downloaded Alcohol Explained and spent the afternoon listening to it whilst sipping my last bottle of wine. Even though I know my own journey of how I got here, it was truly an eye opener and is one of those books that once read, denial is now not an option.
I'm now wide awake with one beer left but I've decided that tomorrow is my day one of quitting alcohol altogether. I've tried moderation, occasional abstinence etc but it always sucks me back in and now I know why. I'm not looking forward to tomorrow but I know I can get through it hopefully now fully armed with the knowledge I've just heard. My plan is to use this thread to track my journey and share my experience. Lastly I would like to thank each and everyone of you who have shared your experience over the years.

Hi @Cleanbedlinen12...I'm still here, just not doing the best...too many day 1's...onto day 2 again but not sure if my head is in it...but really need to try. Feel like it's easier to just give up giving up but going the easier way isn't always the best way

Omg ladywhobakes I am so glad to hear from you. I was going to throw in the towel - after all my enthusiasm, friends cracked open champagne on Saturday, Sunday I pinched a beer to aid recovery and..well, here I am on day 1 again. I was too embarrassed to post and thought I’d give up and let this thread die. I was feeling pretty stupid tbh. yet here you are. Thank you.
Maybe we can encourage each other.

@Cleanbedlinen12, I'm sure we can, and I'm sure we can succeed. Honestly it's so hard to just fall back into old routines. I need to be better for my little boy, I don't want him to
Just think mammy drinks a lot on a night, I want to be fun, playing with him mammy. I feel
Sometimes the bumps in the road are all learning curves, starting a new day 1 but with more perspective. I went out on Saturday, drunk way too much. But yesterday and today, tbh I've not really thought about it but tomorrow is my day to drink so tomorrow will be a hard one but I'm determined..busy doing a jigsaw tonight so will continue tomorrow too (tho tbh it may make me wanna drink...it's not an easy one lol)

Hiya, Well done for doing 2 days! ( and a jigsaw. We got the Star Wars one, I mean HOW difficult!) I think that’s a brilliant reason to quit. Agree it’s all a learning curve, actually what a brilliant attitude , suddenly less ashamed and rubbish…just learning!
Ok so tonight we are going to rock! Ive just realised I can prep dinner at lunch time so I’m not cooking when tired and hungry and vulnerable to The Voice…
have a good day😀

Mines a Harry Potter one..well it's the DD's but she's 12 and too cool to be doing a jigsaw lol but she wants it framed and in her room when it's done.
Today will be a good day..I say baking loads of cakes lol.. once I get past 7pm it's definitely easier..

Ooh, I NEED to get that jigsaw! I am with you, after dinner it’s fine. It’s that evening cooking when knackered thing I just don’t want to be doing it. I want to be in an office working late and complaining about the commute.

I've always done the sort dinner for little
Man and then I will eat later because I don't want to drink after eating so if I eat early then I won't drink..so tonight I've ate with little
Man..done some colouring in and chilled. Gonna get him bathed and sorted for bed and tonight should be good.
How you getting on? I don't think I would every wanna be stuck in the office lol I work for myself so some days are really late finishes and some I can get away earlier

@Cleanbedlinen12 the jigsaw is a nightmare..will take a pic of the box for you...it's frustrating lol

Oh I’d love to work for myself. I tried but didn’t get too far. Dh insists on an office job, it’s finding one that’s the problem! We ate pasta ( easy!) and I ate everything I could find while cooking it! Nice cup of herb tea and a book, love bedtimes.
hope the jigsaw was fun!

Day 3! Again! How are you doing theladywhobakes? I hope the jigsaw is working. Maybe there’s a grown up hog warts for disillusioned mums, and by doing the jigsaw you create a portal to it.! 🧙🧝‍♀️🦹🦸🧌🧚‍♀️🏰🚂🚋🚋🚋🚋🚋 🏃‍♀️
Maybe it’s less booze, but I’m working stuff out more, for what it’s worth. Mainly I unsuccessfully keep trying the same crap to get unstuck, so I am now following and imagining I’m a self care/ lifestyle tweaking type you tuber and..working out how to take time for me. Radical concept! I thought it meant get a massage ( which is never going to happen is it) now I’ve learnt it’s bother to have a banana instead of stale bread, and I prepped dinner while I scrubbed, which meant we ate early which meant I wasn’t so tempted to drink.
Also going to Chuck LOADS of crap. Our house is a permanent tip. 90 days to get myself sorted thats end of aug. Day 87 countdown!
sorry, waffling. In 90 days I’d like to have lost a stone, be able to run or be doing yoga, be eating well. I’ll have the house declutter Ed, and I’ll have made it nice. I’ll have a career too. Ha ha ha ha ha.
sorry to waffle. More accountable if I write it here!

I'm back, I had to have a break one of my son's was having a mental health crisis. He's seen his GP now and referred which took forever I've been down this road with my mother so I know he's got a struggle. @Cleanbedlinen12 so glad to see you are still here. These past few weeks have been tough I have succumbed to drinking occasionally I felt huge guilt that my child was suffering, so I thought a bottle of wine would help and it doesn't.

Oh my gosh, I am so sorry to hear your news. I am very glad he’s getting help now. Cannot imagine what you - and he- and everyone has been through, no wonder a drink seemed like a good idea. Massive virtual hugs, and anything we can do to help…I’m sure it’s normal to feel guilty just massively crap, and I’m sure a wiser person would say it’s ok, and really look after yourself.
Welcome back too, it’s not been the same without you! And incredibly well done - ‘drinking occasionally’ is a very impressive phrase at any time, especially for now. Massive hugs and a shuffle up on the sofa for you.💐💐💐💐💐

Aww thanks @cleanbedlinen12 that space on the sofa is so needed 😍.

I am still around I sometimes feel I don't have much to offer as I am nearly 5 months sober. I hear all your struggles and have been there, when I read your posts clean I am taken back to my earlier days. Meal prep was my trigger as was a clean house and a day off🙄. Don't beat yourself up, put yourself first and try to re organise your day. You can do this.

Oneday sorry to hear about your ds that makes sobriety very tough indeed, it feels at times like alcohol will improve a situation but as you said it really does not. I hope your ds is improving. It's a funny thing the problems remain with or without alcohol and whilst that drink blur, gives the the 'courage' to face things it is fake. It's so much worse the next day with a hangover and self loathing.

Sorry theladywhobakes I am rubbish at name checks. You make a good point about bumps in the road, that really does explain sobriety. It's like accepting what has happened and pushing on regardless. With support on here you can all do this. Do you have support in real life?

rupertspenneysmistress thanks for posting! I found your post really encouraging, so thank you. I think you’re right about putting yourself first - it’s very hard, a different mindset.
well done, Five months is incredible, and it’s good to know you’ve been through the exact same stuff- it makes it easier somehow.
reorganising the day really helps, can’t believe the difference prepping dinner early makes. Yesterday I didn’t get chance so chucked passata into old veg and told Dh it was veggie chilli. Ooh I’m horrible! Couldn’t face it myself😂thank goodness for lidls crisps.
how are you oneday hope you are managing to de stress. There are some 5 min. Relaxations on insight timer - jack kornfield and Tara brach are good.
hope the jigsaw is working! Sure it has magic powers.
day 4 done.

@Rupertpenrysmistress well done on 5 months. My DS is doing much better now he has reached out. I think the pandemic hit him hard as he worked all the way through often 50-60 hours a week. Now it's all back to normal he's hit burnout.
@cleanbedlinen,@cleanbedlinen

Sorry fat thumb pressed post to soon so I will continue.
Yes bumps in the road is a good way to put it. I felt so guilty that I had let everyone down because I had a few drinks. But in reality it was just a couple and not a full blown bender.
I've dusted that feeling off now and I am back on track so I can be fully present if any of my DC, family need me but also for myself. I will check out those relaxation suggestions thank you.
@theladywhobakes i would love to get back into jigsaws but my cat destroys them.

Morning! Gosh your poor DS that’s a aLOT of hours, he must have been deeply exhausted. Am very glad he’s getting help. Massive well done to you for realising and sorting out that help. Have a friend with a dd who was nurse training And similar thing happened. Just the stress and fear of early covid and not being able to help.So, if it helps, you are not alone.
we did a lot of diy yesterday and I managed to drink water but then the wine witch persueded me into a beer. Only one! Yayyyyyy. Today though am fuzzy headed and lost all that energy. It REALLY is rubbish stuff. How many times do I need to learn that?! 85 days left till I am sober and slim and sorted. Better get a move on!
well done everyone else.

I am a NHS nurse too, and worked/am working through the pandemic. It really escalated my drinking. It was part of the reason I had to stop, I felt I couldn't expect my body and mind to cope with this and alcohol on top. I am not superwoman.

We put ourselves under a lot of pressure that's for sure.
I'm doing sod all today apart from getting work clothes ready.
I'm making scones atm the kitchen smells lovely got a carvery meal to go to later then a film and an early night.
Hope you all have a restful Sunday.

Hello all. Can I join you?

I have been drinking far too much ever since the pandemic. What used to be a couple of bottles a week has crept up to four, sometimes five and I know it will go up further if I don't stop it now.

I think I would like to give up for good, see what life is like without booze. Whether I am capable is another matter. Anyway, this is day one and will see what happens...

My danger point is cooking. I love to have a couple of glasses, then all resolve not to drink more goes out of the window.

Hi @LydiaLurk welcome,
I think the pandemic was a tipping point for a few of us.
Lovely to have you here as you will have possibly read I made this post out of desperation and I've been overwhelmed by the support. This journey isn't a straight path by any means I've fell down a few times but it has helped me be more mindful and given me the courage to be more open with RL friends who have been just as supportive and not judgy as I thought they would be.
What do you have planned today?

Thanks oneday. Not much planned, just pottering about. Will be cooking later, but not drinking while doing so!

I have lurked on this and other alcohol threads for a while now. They have been really helpful to read.

Can I also join? Drinking far too much and fed up of waking up full of regret and self hatred. Am aiming for 3 weeks drink free to start with but hopefully longer. I can easily drink 5 bottles of wine a week its too much. I seem to either be at work, having a drink or hungover.. need to work on getting a better balance to life! Day 1 here.