Still stopped in 2020; a thread for anyone abstaining from alcohol.

[Drybird2020]

Dry January is over and the next phase has begun! Wherever you are on your sobriety journey, you're welcome here for encouragement, advice and support.

We love hearing from people who have been dry for a long time, so if you've swung by to have a look, please post to inspire us!

Equally, if you've woken up hungover, regretful and ashamed, determined that it's the last time, we've all been there and we're here for you now.

Lurky-lurkers, we know you're there! I observed the alcohol support threads for years before I felt ready to take the plunge, I hope these threads help others; if and when you feel ready to post, you'll get a warm welcome.

Might I respectfully ask that if your aim is moderation, you join the long running moderation thread in this topic. I find moderation chat difficult; it weakens my resolve, and many others feel the same.

I'm Drybird, 31 days sober. In that time I have saved 183 units, £192, and 12600 calories! I intend to be sober for the rest of my life, and I use this thread to keep me accountable.

It would be great to know how everyone is getting on, so if you'd like to check in below, please do! No need to share stats unless you want to, just give us a wave.

Here's tae us!

But no urge to drink - approaching 100 days bar a few halves on his birthday

You must have the weight of the world on your shoulders @StillDumDeDumming. Do you have any support in real life? Someone to drop off shopping, the kind of thing? Well done, my 100 day soberversary is approaching as well. This thread is keeping me going.

Special shout out to @Drybird2020 too. [smiles]

FWIW @Drybird2020, it was DD's 9th birthday on Monday. On her first birthday my DH was taken away in an ambulance with suspected heart problems 3 months after having a kidney transplant. It was all very frightening - not just that one episode but the hospitalisation, the recovery and struggling with it all as well - and I look back wonder how we ever got through it, but we did and so will you.

Sorry @Drybird2020 I meant to take @StillDumDeDumming

@ulysses that Is worth a lot thank you. It’s hard to look at the future. And you do have to Just focus on every day in these situations. But somehow retain the bigger picture!

I am at 94 days! Big thank you to @Drybird2020 For these threads.

Thought this is worth read.

www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2020/apr/05/im-an-alcoholic-mum-but-my-husband-wont-help-by-not-drinking

This paragraph resonate with me (Im 45 btw so a wee bit younger but definitely this)

As a woman slightly older than you, I know very well how wine is no longer my friend: it leads to insomnia, late-night bouts of anxiety and an inability to perform at anything like my full capacity the following day. As those are all areas of deterioration in middle age anyway, being dependent on a supposed mood “enhancer” that only causes further depletion of your “assets” is something that’s worth battling to be free of. It’s a tough challenge, but one you can’t afford to turn down.

I saw that too! Thanks for posting it Ulysses.

Still you've made it through another day. I hope you have a peaceful night. I could understand your DP weeping at the plate of home cooking. Food is loaded with love and comfort and memory. I find I'm cooking a lot at the moment with us all at home and eating three meals a day. I'm sure in future some particular flavours will take me straight back to this time.

I wonder if this might be helpful. The naked mind are doing free live coaching sessions. I started off with the alcohol experiment- it’s really good. Plus I’ve found that I don’t get loads of emails from them.

[https://learn.thisnakedmind.com/tnm-connection-registration]

learn.thisnakedmind.com/tnm-connection-registration

I can't believe it!!

Well done Peaches!

@TeachesOfPeaches 🎉🎉🎉
I’m five days behind you.

Thank you @SparklingLime and @HowlsMovingBungalow. If lockdown was this time last year I would have been panic buying wine, staying up late, blacking out in the couch at night and being hungover every day. Feels great not to be that person anymore

@TeachesOfPeaches brilliant work. Well done. I agree lockdown for me would’ve involved securing the wine as top priority.

Dp has been readmitted - he wasn’t getting enough oxygen. I feel terrible and so sad he’s on his own.

Congratulations, teaches! That’s brilliant work. You must be so proud

This is the best time to be sober, imagine how wretched we’d all be feeling if we were trying to cope with everything going on plus hangovers and booze anxiety.

Sorry, I've been absent from the thread, but great to see that everyone is coping so well, and congratulations to @TeachesOfPeaches.

@StillDumDeDumming, so sorry to hear of your setback, I can't imagine how difficult things are for you right now. You are in our thoughts.

@StillDumDeDumming that must be very hard emotionally but he needs medical care and you can't provide that at home. Try and get some rest, eat something healthy, take care of yourself. Wishing you both the best.

@TeachesOfPeaches congratulations!!!! 🎊 ☕ 🥉I'll be there in a couple of days too, I think there are a few of us around the same milestone. I'm also very glad to have chosen this point in time to liberate myself from the clutches of booze! It would be awful to be hungover, extra tired, even more anxious and short of patience during the pandemic.

@TeachesOfPeaches congratulations!

Day 99 here.

I've been reflecting on the 100 day milestone and remembering that in AA the three month chip is red as a warning against complacency. I'm managing lockdown OK, keeping busy at home and not getting out means I'm not tempted by springtime associations with drinking. And there is nothing in the house that I'd want to drink anyway. But I guess when all of this is over then temptations could arise.

I’m thinking about this too, @Drybird2020. The last bit of my 100 days is going sooo slowly. As I’m intending to carry on, I’m not sure why I care, but it does feel like quite a milestone.

@Drybird2020 @jess3817 @EIsaCragg @SophocIestheFox @StillDumDeDumming thank you for the kind words!

Good to see everyone still going! Hopeful thoughts for anyone suffering illness at the moment or supporting others.

I was thinking of this thread the other day, I was wondering how everyone was getting on.

My partner is very glad we aren't drinking now, as the temptation would be strong to do nothing else right now. As it is we're working from home, having dinner then a gentle evening walk.

I have been thinking the same thing. In fact I'd probably be drinking more than I was before. Only 36 days in for me but, so grateful not to be drinking now.