Anyone else stopping completely in 2020?

[Drybird2020]

I don't mean moderating or cutting down, I know that I can't control my drinking this way and I need to stop.

I have stopped for periods of time before and enjoyed the peace of not thinking about alcohol, or stressing about my consumption, or negotiating with myself about whether or not to get a bottle of wine on the way home on a Wednesday night.
There's no point in doing dry January, because I will just use it to justify a wet February.

There used to be a series of threads for total abstinence, think it was in Relationships but it seems to have tailed off. I could really do with a place to talk about this, but with an emphasis on being dry, not moderate. And if nobody else is keen I can use it as somewhere to witter away to myself.

Laughing at all the incredulity at non-instant weight loss! Mine included!

Well done, Dotty, your garden sounds amazing!

I've been writing since 9am and am now off to get blown about on the beach for a bit, then shops on the way back for some healthy food for dinner.

In my experience it takes months for any weight loss to happen. I don’t drink pop and I eat better because I don’t have late night toast etc. But I know I won’t lose for ages.

@HouseTornado I live in the keepers cottage on a working farm so fields for miles here! The wildlife is fascinating until it creeps in the house... very breezy here you'll be sand blasted on the beach today!

Having a quick sit down.. the hovel/office is complete 😊 I've managed the 16 hrs fasting but might push through to tea time.

@dottydolly72 you sound so productive that's amazing! Loving your day!
Hunkered down on the sofa after my Nightshift last night with a coffee... A sandblast on the beach sounds bracing! Enjoy

@Spongeface relax! That must be tough going.. at what point do you sleep 😴 back off on the school run shortly.. it's been a productive day so far but I've not actually logged in to do any work yet!! I'm very good at avoiding emails lol

@dottydolly72 I am relaxing.. heating up to 100! I had three hours this morning and an early night will do me, only one night shift so not too bad bad it's a night I can't drink!
Aha I see now how you have gotten so much done! Avoiding work! No better incentive!

Is there a sobriety/ calorie app can anyone tell me?

Try Dry Iron is the one I use.

Oh @Canadeeio I am so glad to read that, good for you!

I have the Sober Time app which tells me how many days/months/hours etc I've been sober for - so satisfying to rack up saintly hours while I'm asleep!

No weight loss here yet. Tbh I'm not worried about that, but like anyone wouldn't mind losing a couple of pounds. However the amount I'm shoving into my gob right now, I'm not expecting to have to tighten my belt any time soon.

Did a five mile run at lunchtime and don't feel knackered which is encouraging. Or may be related to the handfuls of fudge I've eaten all afternoon.

Growing a five mile run? That's very inspiring. I managed a windy half hour walk hour on the beach (the weather was widny, not me). Now trying not to think about fudge bloody low-carb diet.

You lot are all very inspiring with your various activities. @HouseTornado, what are you writing? @dottydolly72 the garden sounds fab, I saw some sort of hawk in mine last year but he hasn't come back, I think he might have been after the hens but the DC make enough noise to keep him away. Decluttering too, I'm super impressed 😊

And @Growingboys, a five mile run... I can't even run to the end of the road at the moment! Planning for that to change though....

I've had an eventful journey home, the car started behaving very oddly and I manged to get to a small town and pull in before it conked out altogether which is lucky because otherwise I'd be sitting on a dark rural road in the middle of storm Brenda. I managed to get a taxi home at vast expense, but worth every penny thanks to the garrulous driver who told me all about his career in hGv driving, his bowel cancer and benefit-scrounging daughter and her many children. Also someone called Ian who he might or might not have worked with, I'm hazy on the details.

The downside is that I missed yoga, but I'm happy to be home with a cup of tea and watching horrible histories with the DC.

Drybird I'm writing a presentation for a conference in a few weeks. I'm a p/t uni lecturer-f/t PhD student.

I only walked! And slowly at that!

I am so sorry about your taxi journey (though I am laughing at the details!). HH is one of my faves, and will be just the tonic you need.

The fudge was a week old present from someone at work @HouseTornado - so a bit stale, but that didn't stop me! I'm envying you your beach - I ran through Hyde Park and Green Park in London in my lunch break. Much less picturesque at this time of year.

Love the driver and his chat @Drybird2020 - hilarious!

Also love this thread - it is so so helpful, to celebrate on when you're feeling strong, and to cling on to when it all seems a bit much. I want to read back from the start but never have enough bloody time.

Loving the Annie Grace book atm - it's the most convincing of all of them for me.

I’m going to London in a couple of weeks with my fella for his 50th. He drinks a lot. But he says he’d like to go to redemption bar in Covent Garden. Alcohol free and does adaptogenic drinks. Expensive of course

@StillDumDeDumming thanks for the recommendation. I live in London and have been looking for new places to go that aren't the pub. The annoying thing with these places in that the non-alcoholic and vegan/vegetarian options often cost the exact same as the alcoholic and meaty versions of their products (eg vegetarian pret)

I know what you mean @TeachesOfPeaches. I think with some of the adaptogenic or seedlip type drinks, the ingredients and processes are quite expensive but presumably no tax? But yes there’s no need for plant based food to be the same price!

Morning everyone, how are we all feeling today?

I'm on a LC diet at the mo, which I'm enjoying as you're not supposed to drink for the first two weeks - and well, I've nailed that bit so far. It does also mean no AF beer either, but I'm feeling like I should knock that on the head anyway.

Seeing a friend for lunch on Saturday (it's in a pub), so slightly worried. We'll have a coffee first and I'm just going to tell her the truth. We've been friends for 30 years, and whilst I know she'll be supportive, I'm worried it won't be our usual throwing back the wine and catching up event it usually is.

Any tips? x

What I mean is, she'll be disappointed, I feel ok about it not being that kind of event!

@HouseTornado if I were you I would play the victim card so she feels sorry for you rather than irked that you're not not doing what she'd like.

I have a DC with SEN and a major reason I'm giving up is that it's so much harder to cope with all that that involves with a hangover. So if people get tricky (and the odd one is sad that I'm no longer the brilliant laugh in the pub, ordering another round) I play the SEN card and that shuts them up!

You gotta do what you gotta do.

Also, if you're meeting in a decent foodie pub ask the waiter what AF drink they have - we had a pub lunch on Sunday and they were obviously SO used to it and reeled off a long list which made me feel much better.

Is it worth giving your friend the heads up first? So she’s not got a boozy catch up in mind when you meet? She can still drink of course I take it, but it does completely change the dynamic.

Growing and StillDumeDeDumming - I think you make good points - I don't want to lie or tell her a half-truth so that she thinks I can have a drink just this once - I want to be bullet proof! I did think about saying I'm on anti-biotics (I still clearly have a cold), but maybe that's not a good idea.

One of my main reasons for going AF is that I am in the final stages of my PhD, and I need to have my wits about me 100% this year if I am to complete on time (and get everything else done and be the most appealing candidate for when a job comes up). I think that's a good enough reason, and of course, as you say, she'll still be able to drink.

I know it wouldn't bother me at all if someone didn't drink, so long as I could!

Maybe a text the day before...but my gut feeling is a good honest chat when we have a coffee when we meet first of all...

It's hard, isn't it?

Oh and great tip about looking at the AF drinks choices!

Good shout @Still - then your friend can adjust her expectations, take the car or whatever

sorry X posted

I think I'll discuss as well with my Mum - she's pretty good at knowing what to do!

I do feel honesty is the best policy. I'' text her on Friday.

Thanks, both.