Wankerbastards move to 2020. With moderatin' a plenty. We rage against flouncers, strops and teens, and of dryness we have big dreams. We want teacups not fuckups!

[Frouby]

Thread 9 for the tryers to be dryers. Join us if you want some support to reduce alcohol. All welcome for support, laughs and moderating.

Will tag a few peoples name I can spell as I am useless at clicky links.

@flossie
@madameforest
@longestlurkerever
@dionoysa
@waterandlemonjuice

Oh God NC4, I'd have been thinking exactly the same. Poor you. I hope you are having a warmer and safer day today.

Water, I think I could have written that book. DD's brain is similar to that of a toddler, in terms of risk assessment and processing speed between being given an instruction and acting on it.

Frouby, go for the hunting decor!!

Madame, I’m so sorry about your mum. I’m glad you’re safely home.

I second that, water.

Oh NC4 that sounds awful, i bet you were so glad to get home.

Mme, i am so very sorry to hear the news of your mum.

Water,Dion, sending love and strength for parenting teens.

Thanks for the paint chat. You all have good taste. Hague blue is the one posh friends have and juniper ash was one of the ones i was looking at too. Still don't know though, would be easier just to refresh what i have. Yy to frouby re not being arsed with all the prep. If i don't change the colour i can get away with not emptying all the shelves etc. Friend sent this which sums it up really www.rosiemadeathing.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2019/03/CST002-BELIEVED.jpg

Hello, can I join in please? 36 days alcohol free but that’s mainly because I committed some terrible fuck ups on nights out last year and sort of punishing myself for it. My aim is to learn to go out, have fun and not consume approximately 159 cocktails, 300 shots and 5 bottles of wine...

Welcome Lady! You can indeed. We are mostly aiming for moderation here but there have been some pretty impressive AF stretches. Very well done on yours!

I feel like running away again, but just registering that DS added to my woes earlier. Then Enabler DP thought it would help to give me a drink or six. FML.

PS NC4, I love the idea of being on a par with your posh friends.

NC4, we are indeed posh on this thread!

Welcome Lady. Good luck.

Longest, my mum actually gave me a coaster with that on it as a present recently 😂😂 I often CBA

I’ve done boring housework today, argued with dd about sixth form, wasted 2 hours taking dh’s car into the garage AGAIN at the end of which they said they couldn’t replicate the fault FFS

And then went to an obscure shop on the way home to cheer dd up and they had they lovely and obscure wine we were gifted in our holiday cottage at new year so I cracked and bought some so I’m not at all AF. Epic fail but in my defence, teenagers. No court would convict me etc

No, they really wouldn't convict you, Water.

I'm also arguing with my DD about sixth form.

However, DS has taken over the mantle of maternal indignation this evening. So at least they are sharing it out.

And I am have had about a month's worth of units in one night.

FML.

Ahh, Dion, the old ‘if it’s not one, it’s the other’ routine. I’m sure my two have some kind of agreement.
I can’t decide if I’m looking forward to or dreading half term. I do like the February one as it’s DS2s birthday and always feels like the turn of the year, when Spring starts to spring. Maybe I’ll take the opportunity to paint my kitchen.

The obscure shop sounds fun Water. What else do they sell? I fancy a trip to some kind of vintage emporium but as I’m feeling the ££ effects of all the time I had off over Christmas, I can’t really.

I’ve got no work again today, either. Slightly worrying. I’m going to have to get my thinking cap on...

NC4, it’s a farm shop in the middle of nowhere and sells things like pink Himalayan salt, pots of £££ condiments, farm shop ready meals (£££), trays of eggs, meat, vegetables, strawberry jam for £5, that kind of thing. I spent £35 and for that I got 2 bottles of wine (£16 for both) a red pepper, 3 pieces of shortbread, 2 pieces of carrot cake and 3 mini victoria sponges.

Haven’t been awake long, slept badly because wine. My own fault. Will definitely be AF today.

Dion, tag team terrible teenagers, deep joy. Dd wants to go to a shitty sixth form miles away (we have 2/3 other good options nearby) so I’ve said she needs to try the bus journey on her own over half term. Hopefully that’ll put her off. It’s about 1.5 hours door to door.

water I had that conversation with my dd and said the same. By the time she had researched bus/train/bus she fortunately changed her mind and is opting for 6th form at her current school. Which is the best in the area anyway.

madame how is your mum? Will you be coming back over to the UK again to see her? Must be very difficult to be so far away at this time.

Dion this too shall pass. Nod and smile and do what you need to get through it. Teens are such complicated beasts.

Have put my university application in. Gulp. Have actually applied to a real university (sheffield) instead of OU. Can apply to OU if my application isn't successful. Is a 4 year course, English and Philosophy with a foundation year. Will be quicker than OU, and will hopefully get some student funding as DHs income on its own will be less than 30k. Am not sure if I am doing the right thing, only way to find out is try it I suppose. Can park and ride from local train station to get to uni, ds will have to have some before/after school childcare but will cross that bridge when I get to it. Dd could in theory help out on her way home from 6th form and there is breakfast and afterschool clubs but am hoping that actual time in university is mornings so I can be back for pick ups. Tis what it is though, its for the dcs benefit so they will have to suck it up a bit.

Don't know if I am nervous or excited. Mainly just thinking wtf have I done. Dh is like 'whatever you want love, whatever you think is best'.

That’s very exciting Frouby. I went to uni in Sheffield. Hallam though because the course was more modern, which is what I wanted. My actual contact hours studying English were only between 7-14 a week - the rest was independent study, so you’ll probably be fine.
I would love to go back to uni. I’m very jealous!

That is what I am hoping for NC so I can be around for drop offs and stuff. I think if I get a place at least people (dh and dd mainly) will take it more seriously. I could see OU being classed as a bit of a hobby/vanity thing and trying to squeeze it in between everything else. The maintenance loan will also mean I won't have to do as much, if any matched betting. Maybe a couple of hours a week if that. And if I want to ride BabyPony I can park and ride from Meadowhall train station, we can see it from the yard so that will work well.

Just need to get used to studying and writing essays and stuff again. I pick things up quickly anyway but writing my personal statement has given me brain drain never mind a full essay.

And if dd goes to Sheffield uni (which she is leaning towards) we will be there at the same time, possibly both doing Eng Lit. She says she's not sure how she feels about that 🙈.

Wow, Frouby!!! That is a seriously impressive decision.

I will be glad when the tag-teenage years are over. I'm knackered. And monstrously hungover as well. Urgh.

NC4, the short answer to the looking forward to half term question is: no.

Totally read that as you riding Baby Pony to Meadowhall and getting the bus/tram from there Frouby. I’m not sure why you don’t just ride her into uni and tie her up outside the library?

Oh, Sheffield uni has the Paternoster lifts, doesn’t it? You have to go, just for them!
Agree that it will be taken more seriously than OU, plus you get the student experience. The mature students on my course had a lovely friendship group. Us young uns babysat for them.

Oh well done Frouby, how amazing! I’m envious too. It sounds brilliant.

Day 2 AF here, we’ve eaten and I’m on the sofa with no wine in the fridge so no danger of drinking.

Oh wow frouby, good luck! Fab decision. Some people employ students as after school cover so hopefully there will be flexibility on some days at least.

Lol at all the teens volunteering themselves for hours of commute each day. I am getting caught up in similar conversations but with other parents. Am pretty sure it's not a good idea to go and investigate highly selective schools miles away but i keep having my head turned by other people. I might make an exception for the school opposite my work as in principle i could travel with her, though whether she'd actually allow that is questionable. See also: tutoring. I kind of think dc spend enough hours as it is doing school stuff (how will they fit in their endless youtubing?) but i am in a minority round here and questioning my judgment as a result.

Half term isn't really happening here - i am farming kids out and working through it, except thurs and fri when i am repaying childcare favours. So i am not especially looking forward to it but like NC4 am enjoying the signs of spring. Had to dash to parliament today and got caught up in big protest. Bonus was being stuck outside in proper sunshine.

Was AF yesterday and v moderate on Mon. Promised myself i would be AF tonight and tomorrow but i am quite tempted to break it tbh. Will see how i get on.

Thank you all, I really really want a place now, am desperately hoping I at least get an interview as I am sure I will come across better at interview than in my personal statement.

Not dry, brain was drained doing the application, then had swimming straight from school then came home and have made meatballs and tomato sauce. Kids not having the meatballs just pasta and the sauce.

Have invented an amazing tomato sauce if anyone likes stuff like that. 2 carrots, 2 onions, 4 cloves of garlic and 2 sticks of celery all blitzed up in food processor to a paste. Oil in pan then fry off for about 10 mins. Add a glass of wine and cook alcohol off. 1/2 tube of tomato puree, 2 cartons of pasata, mixed herbs, salt and pepper and 2 tablespoons of sugar, a mug of water. Simmer for 30 mins. It's gorgeous even if I do say so myself, even fussy mcfussy veg refusnik ds is tucking in. Reckon it would also be really good as a base for bolognese/lasagne sauce.

Had 1 beer, will probably have another. No fucks to give cos I am winding down for half term 😁.

Good luck Frouby! And good for you giving it a go. I'm sure you'll be accepted. And thanks for the tomato sauce recipe - I hadn't thought of adding celery and carrots. I love a simple tomato and basil sauce with parmesan cheese on pasta. And of course a little sugar in the sauce is a must.
Mum has been moved to a local hospice today as there is nothing that can be done for her medically. She is 82 and chemo isn't an option, nor are all the exams to find out exactly where the cancer is. The blood cluoy is also untreatable as she has no platelets.
She wanted to finish her life in this particular hospice, she used to be a volunteer there and it is the best place to be for palliative care. She isn't in pain, is planning her funeral and service and was really pissed off when her brother (who she detests) turned up to see her today.
It's all happened very suddenly but maybe it is better like that. At least I can speak to her by phone even if I can't be there in person.

It was really nice Madame, the veg base gave it a bit of texture and added flavour. I love tomato pasta but DH isn't a fan but he gave it a good go. I think in the summer when I am drowning in ripe tomatoes I will do the same but use fresh tomatoes but roast them down then blitz the pass through a sieve like a fresh pasata.

Am so sorry about your mam. It's good she is where she wants to be though, and I suspect she isn't one for people fussing around her. My aunt is back in hospital as well, the one who had lung cancer. Liver cancer tests came back negative but she's now severely jaundiced and dehydrated so they are not sure what is going on. Severe stomach pains as well so it's all a bit of a worry. Was supposed to be doing a belated new years day dinner for her on sunday but it's going to be delayed again by the looks of things.

How old is your aunt Frouby? I think there comes a time when the person just can't cope anymore with the exams to find out the problem. Mum could have had an MRI scan but it would have taken 1.5 hours and she couldn't have coped with it in her weak state. There comes a time when enough is enough. The hospital was brilliant, but busy, noisy and confusing. She is much happier where she is now. I hope things work out for your aunt.

Not AF 🙄😟😳but not drinking too much either

Not AF either. But have recommended theatre tickets for BIL to buy for DH's birthday, and booked an escape room for us to do together on Friday when we are both off work, so feeling happy.

Frouby/Mme, sending hugs, I agree with Mme that a good death can be a privilege, in a way. x