Tryers to be dryers spring into spring, not as much wine, beer or gin. We sow our seeds of hope for a dryer season, but if we drink, it's for a reason.

[Frouby]

Thread 5 for Tryers to be Dryers. A thread for those who want support for moderating or reducing alcohol. Whatever you hope to do, whether it's to have more dry days, or be less wet when you do drink, come and join us for support.

Absolutely no judgement here, just friendly support and chat, the odd swear (lots of swears to be honest). All welcome, new and old tryers to dryers.

12lbs in 4 days, wow! That's a great start water no wonder you are feeling happy. I lost a few kgs on 5:2 and like fasting from time to time. If I'm not hungry I don't eat, and if I eat too much for one meal I skip another meal.
longest I hope you have a good lunch with your Paris friend.
Frouby sometimes I make savoury tarts instead of quiche, my favourite is red onion with goats cheese, but I suppose the pastry and cheese aren't particularly slimming even if there is no cream and just one egg involved.
I'm so square, I've never taken speed or any other drugs except the odd puff on a joint which I hated because I don't like smoking. Alcohol is my only vice, and really only red wine (occasionally a beer or cider in hot weather). I have a cupboard full of other stronger stuff but it is only used for entertaining.
Weather is crap here too, wanted to go for a long bike ride as I'm not teaching this morning but its raining. I feel stupidly lazy if I don't do more exercise than my daily 10km run at 7am. I suppose sport is an addiction for me.

MadamForest red wine is my thing too, although I can be persuaded to drink other things
water that’s brilliant. Well done. Yes 5:2 but generally low-carb choices too. It’s a good combo if you can get the balance that works for you.
In further twatting quiche news, I just made and ate a kuku. It’s basically a frittata with tons of herbs and a frittata is arguably pretty much a crustless quiche. But you are right frouby getting these kind of fuckers out of the dish is the thing. This all rehearsal for the start of BSD...

Hmm gestational diabetes did not require me to stick to 800 calories though - arent you starving? Maybe I will give it a try though, or at least a less hardcore version. I did feel healthier on gd diet even compared to normal pregnancy AF.

Tried to fish bike out of shed. It is rusty and unusable. Going to see if bike shop can repair it, otherwise need new one doh. So catching bus to swimming pool in attempt to be greener b the driver forgot to tell me the destination board was wrong so I have ended up back at home. Trying again. Is hard this having a conscience lark.

Another bank holiday weekend! What's everyone up to? I have no major plans. Meeting friend I sacked off last weekend at natural history museum. Have promised kids a lido swim as it's start of the summer season and they are letting kids in at last, but it's turned a bit chilly. Was also considering day trip to brighten but the trains are messed up.

That’s true longest 800 is a bit hard core, I don’t calorie count for myself, but I’m pretty good at it so can boss DH around. I’m more interested in low-carb because it treats the liver so well. Funny how I can be very serious about that while drinking a whole bottle of wine
Sorry about the bus ride. It did make me laugh though.

Eggs are good Madame. Pastry and cream and cheese are very calorific though which is sad, because they are so versatile. I make frittata too, usually in the summer to use up a glut of courgettes.

I usually naturally fast from 8pm to about 2pm the next day, apart from my coffee with a bit of milk. For what I eat I should be skinny, never have breakfast, don't snack really, eat homecooked most nights. It's just beer that is doing for me. And wine.

Tonight I will stick to the gin. Will be having takeaway for dinner because Friday, but will have chicken tikka and salad, no bread or rice. Which will still probably be over my syns allowance for the day but have been at least 5 under all week so will probably get away with it, not least because I am so fat.

Just got home from a very cold and wet stables. Ds dropped a housebrick on hos thumb while waiting to go in school in the little play area. It swelled up straight away and bruised so have brought him with me, as school would have phoned me to pick him up anyway. Teacher said as much while applying an ice pack. So he's been at the stables as well. Luckily he's using it ok and not really complaining about it so don't think we need A and E.

Hi everyone. Please can I join? I desperately want to cut down what I drink, trying to stick to macro counting as I feel fat and horrible and then the evenings come and I give in to wine

Pmsl longest at your getting a bus back home, that’s funny!

I’m not really hungry on 800 cal, mainly because I’m eating plenty of protein and also drinking lots of water. I could kick myself for doing this diet last year, losing 2 stone and then going back to eating carbs and sugar and necking wine AGAIN. Am determined to be a smaller size for November...

MdmeForest, I like the sound of a kuku, might try that.

Leaving, yy to liver, am hoping mine is not beyond redemption. I’m probably going to have wine at the 4 weeks stage, which is half way but will try not to until then. Famous last words...

Frouby, I think they call beer ‘liquid toast’ because it’s so calorific, thank goodness I don’t like it. But yes, your fasting and not snacking sounds like you should be thin, bet you’re not terribly overweight though are you? And you ride too so that must use up some energy.

Hi alwayssunshine, welcome to the thread 🙂

Welcome sunshine!

Yes this particular bus is ridiculous. It does a really silly route which means it passes the same bit in both directions and this isn't the first time it's had the wrong destination on! Plus you supposed to be able to flag it down wherever because there are no bus stops but in reality unless you're in the know and stand in exactly the right stop the driver gives you a load of abuse or just sails past you. I kind of like it! Makes you feel like you're living in a 1950s village rather than 21st century London.

Had wine with friend at lunch. Supposed to be meeting her again now with kids but miscommunication means I had to come back and wait for dd2 to get back from forest school. Now will have to get silly bus again because wine.

Stop saying bad things about beer!! I’m on my second pint. Freelance Friday, I’ve been working from the boozer.
After my week of moderating and dieting I feel a bit tipsy off it. I’m going to be zzzing in front of Corrie, aren’t I?
Freezing here. Going to stock up on logs on my way home, and possibly red wine.

FFS. Popped round to mate's house with kids (stressful friend of a few posts back who is mutual friend of Paris friend) and ended up downing a bottle of wine each or so it felt. Stressful friend wouldn't take no for an answer (though at least didn't mention work once). Luckily her DH Gabe us a lift back or I might not have managed to get DC home in one piece. Need to get them into bed then am contemplating more wine with DH. This isn't good, is it? At the same time was nice to have a proper catch up with pals without discussing drafting nuances.

I do like a beer too. That first outdoor pint of the year is one of life's great pleasures. Liquid toast doesn't sound so bad.... Toast is good too.

I love a beer me. After a busy arse day being school run mum, ponymum, Goddess of Matched Betting, housework queen, schoolrun mum again, chicken mum, dogwalk mum, doting wife and chef I need a fucking beer.

I wear so many hats a day its a wonder I don't have fucking alopecia with the on again, off again malarkey.

But a nice, cold beer makes it all worth it. Or at least bearable. Failing that a gin hits the spot as well, with a lot less calories.

But would still choose beer, or a wine over gin. I like gin don't get me wrong. But there is something so refreshing and relaxing about a beer.

If I had the choice over gin or water it would be water. I was Very Sick aged 17 after drinking too much gin and I can't drink it now.
Frouby I'm like you, a lot of hats. But U'd be bored rigid if I didn't have the gîtes, my teaching, my sport, my animals and last but not least my kids to occupy me 17 hours a day. The fact that I've finally met a man who is better at DIY and repairing things, who has as much energy as I do as well as being taller than me and quite good looking is why I married him. It's nice not having to do everything myself now. I've finally met someone who I can depend on. Shame it took 53 years.

Fml, just had to sit on my hands and not post a sarcastic comment on FB. Was in an antenatal group on here, which the progressed to FB. Which I left after the Brexit referendum due to some really arsey, dramatic, judgemental posts. I voted remain but could understand why some people voted leave. Loads of hand wringing and drama, then one member posted that she had voted leave, and said she hoped for a brighter future blah blah blah. The remoaners absolutely crucified this poor lass, so I called them all cunts and flounced.

Was funny as fuck. Loads of PMs from folk asking me to go back, loads of screenshots showing me what they had said about me, loads saying the agreed with me but darent post because no one would be their friend etc etc etc. Really juvenile stuff.

I unfriended the ones that were arseholes (then was sent the screenshots of them posting how outraged they were at me unfriending them, and how they were going to pm me so I blocked the fuckers as well) but kept some of them as they hadn't done anything wrong.

Anyhow. One of them has just put a picture up of their dc reading a book in bed (5 years old) saying how she is a real bookworm. Another posted 'yeah same', then the other has just posted that she found their ds reading by fucking twinkle lights somewhere obscure like the bottom of the wardrobe (can't remember where) in secret.

Wanted to post that DS disappeared yesterday but was putting a plastic bag over his head to see if he could smell what had been in it 😂😂😂😂.

I don't think I fitted in that group. This is my people. 😂😂😂

Ah Frouby. I have one of those groups for dd2. They are a good bunch, all told, mainly because they're pretty honest about the hard bits as well as the good bits, though I am basically dreading the school years as it's almost inevitable there will be wankery really. I probably would have been a dramatic handwringer, if I am honest, but I hope not a total cunt.

longest it was a nice group really, just a bit of mean girls mentality when they didn't agree with something. Funny thing was I know I posted a few things they didn't agree with, or certain members didn't agree with and they never pulled me on them (because I am an arsey gobshite I imagine) but some of the younger members got negative comments. It wasn't just younger people either, it was quite a mixed group socially and economically and educationally. And those that weren't maybe as confident or articulate or hipster could occasionally get in a muddle trying to explain what they meant, and would get chuntered at.

I didn't mind the handwringers, I was a bit bloody worried myself but it was those who were blaming individual posters for ruining the future of our children.

Meh, nowt as queer as folk as they say and I don't actually miss the group so it can't have been that good.

3 g and ts last night which is very moderate for me on a Friday night, especially calories wise. Not sure what I will do tonight. It's my aunts birthday do at a pub about 8 miles away. So I will drive over but if I have a drink will have to get a taxi home and leave the car. Would like a couple but wouldn't have much more than that so seems a waste of time for the sake of 3 drinks maybe. So will probably be dry.

Will have a couple of soft drinks when I get there then see how I feel. I begrudge paying £4/£5 for a gin and am avoiding lager cos fatclub. But my family do tend to drive me to drink!

Hello I hope you don't mind me joining. I haven't read all the thread but can completely empathise. I've always loved my wine, beer, gin etc over the Christmas period I was drinking every single day (using all the old excuses, its the festive period, my in-laws are here, hair of the dog etc etc). There was always a reason to have a drink, its been a good day, its been a bad day, its the weekend, its a friend's birthday etc etc. The reality is that I was/ am addicted to alcohol. In January I tried doing a 'drier' January (the thought of completely quitting filled me with horror). I was sober during the week and just drank at weekend. All that happened was I felt like shit at the weekends. I'm not just talking physically hungover, I'm talking about the Beer Fear, paranoia, self doubt that accompanied every hangover. In conjunction with my 'drier' January I read "This Naked Mind' by Annie Grace. It really changed the way I thought and felt about alcohol. I now haven't had a drink for 3 months and I can genuinely say I feel so much better. Yes you notice the physical things like weight loss, better skin etc but, more importantly for me, the paranoia beer fear self doubt has gone too. Of course there are days when I can still feel a bit down but nothing compared to hangovers.
For me moderation just wouldn't work I enjoyed booze too much I guess and was very good at convincing myself that it was fine. Last week was my birthday and it was the first adult birthday (other than when I was pregnant) when I didn't get pissed. It was wonderful and I woke the next morning feeling fresh and happy. It felt like a big deal to me, but to my non-drinking friends its nothing abnormal.
I have read quite a lot of 'quit-lit' since and find it really helps to read about women similar to myself who have gone through the journey and come out on the other side feeling so much better about themselves. 'The unexpected joy of being sober' is one but there are loads of others too. Don't give up on the journey, I'm still going through mine but I feel like I'm emerging from the woods now. You will never regret NOT drinking, but you will often regret the drinks you do have. Don't worry about what others might think/ say about it, those that really love you will want you to be happy and will help you. Be kind to yourselves, treat yourselves (I'm eating far more chocolate than before - still losing weight though - shows how calorific wine is!). Good luck x

Referendums are very divisive. Scotland went through the same thing only just before. The horrible thing was you could see the whole thing inevitably unfolding the way it did before it happened, like a Shakespearean tragedy. And then we had Russia and Trump and terrorism and I honestly felt like I just wanted to run away and live in an underground bunker. So instead I drank wine and ate cake, natch.

Sympathy re family driving you to drink. I am thinking it's probably about time I went to visit my mum. I see her often but always down here and she does like to host. But it's the most stressful thing, with her DP and MIL in the mix, and I also don't really have any free weekends due to various things the girls have their hearts set on. Hmm.

On the positive side it's much sunnier than promised to I think I will get to go swimming to fortify myself for dinosaur museum.

I am also prone to agonising in advance about how far to put myself out for a drink. Am going to a gig with dsis on Tuesday and need to drop my not very mobile mum at the station en route so makes sense to drive, but then sober dinner and gig. Suddenly remembered pregnant dsis is insured on my car so could drive it home and was all pleased till I realised what this said about me, given gig and dinner was birthday present for said pregnant dsis. So will try and be sober.

Morning everyone. Suns shining here. Hope it is with you. I've been reading through your posts and I resonating like a good un!
I know I drink too much and weigh too much and do need some inspiration in my life. And I think I've found it here. I love the non judgmentalness.

It's just so very easy to have huge drink less expectations and then fail. I am not a moderator either. But am starting to find it a bit easier to have AF days and then just splurge once or twice ( or 3/4) times a week. But I'm going to be kind to myself. There's a lot going on and my drinking didn't get to this point instantly so it's not going to fall fast either.

Can someone please remind me of a drink less app they're using. I've looked at alcohol free days but ( as it says on the tin) it only marks up alcohol free days and I want to track what I drink on drinking day too.

Thanks.

Sorry badger, crossed posts. You're very welcome here of course and it's great to hear you are doing so well, but you might find this thread isn't the best place for supporting you to be totally AF as we are all trying to dance the difficult line of moderation (though some posters have had some impressively dry patches).

I think the trouble is everyone has a different relationship with alcohol. I did dryer January too but I honestly didn't feel better. I felt bleak and lonely and cripplingly self aware. I did feel healthier, more productive and less guilty though and that's the constant tension in my head.

Hello Autumn, welcome. Some AF days sounds like a good start - I am averaging about 3 a week, though it's slipping back to two really, and I am drinking more on non AF days. I think I know my biggest trigger now, which is my DH's chronic illness and associated mental health issues flaring up. I still don't know how to react better to this - life just feels lonely and pointless at those times and my stress levels get out of control, but he has had a better week so I am keeping everything crossed for a sustained improvement.

I'm sorry to hear you have had a difficult time. I think most of us here have issues we are battling through, hence the thread title.

Hi autumn, welcome. I’m using the dry January app, it goes beyond January and you can track everything

Hi badger, well done, I'm reading quit lit too to keep me motivated

Day 5 AF and BSD here, just made breakfast muffins and have had one of them plus an apple for brunch. We are having lamb cutlets with garlic and rosemary tonight. Dd is away overnight and we’d usually go out but won’t as I will want wine if we do. Dh and I will have a lovely time anyway I’m sure.

Thank you water I'll try that. Good luck everyone in getting through Saturday. I wasn't dry last night. I had a grief recovery session and really felt i deserved a drink. To replace liquid lost through tears if nothing else ( not really a reason) 1 tin of g and t. Three glasses of wine. Could have been worse. But hadn't had anything since Monday. Trying for nothing tonight. But planning drinks tomorrow with my sister.