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Original poster

OK - it's the daily Mail so no wonder it's Judgy - Coleen Rooney

234 replies

DuelingFanjo · 13/11/2009 10:33

out gigging and drinking 9 days after the birth

Is it wrong to be a little bit or mean to be even slightly judgy?

Or perhaps it should be more 'bloody good for her' ?

OP posts:
violethill · 21/11/2009 12:39

PP - you haven't answered the question about whether you think parents cannot bond with their children or adjust to parenthood successfully if they have an evening out within a few weeks of their child's birth?

And where do you draw your completely arbitrary lines? Can a mother who is physically separated from her baby because it's ill, bond successfully? Or is that ok in your book because the mother isn't having a good time? What about fathers who are back at work soon after they have become a parent? I suppose I needn't ask about any mother who dares work before her child is about 35 because I'm sure your Book Of Judgement says that's a no no.

argento · 21/11/2009 12:57

A lot of the judgy responses sound a bit "I'm a good mother and I did things this way. Therefore any woman who doesn't do things my way is a BAD MOTHER".

posieparker · 21/11/2009 13:10

It's just not something I feel is right, I don't have to justify my opinion, why would you want to go out anyway? FFS this is her first child. The whole thing smatters of WAG and competition with that other hideous woman Alex Curran. When did women start to behave like this?

And I would love to know the slating Wayne would have got from the MN panel had he been out on the piss and not his wife.

posieparker · 21/11/2009 13:12

And quite frankly being prevented by circumstance from bonding with your child and choosing to be away from a newborn are really quite different.

WTF has working when a child is older got to do with a night out when the baby is just days old.

My suspicion is that this is not the last time that woman will be out on the piss leaving her baby at home.

MeAndMyMonkey · 21/11/2009 14:44

Do we actually know Coleen was out 'on the piss' - ie drunk, or was she perhaps just having one or two drinks?
Either way, you may not have wished to go out ten days after your baby was born but some women do. My personal idea of hell is sitting there staring at a newborn, resting and healing or whatever. And yes, I felt exactly that way with my firstborn. So what? We have bonded, I love her, that's all that really matters.
I wouldn't have slated Wayne for going out either. I think it's perfectly reasonable for either parent to go out and have a break. So crucify me.
There is so much pressure on women, that is true - but especially so reading some of the judgemental crap on this thread. It's like new mothers aren't allowed any autonomy even if they want it!

GreenMonkies · 21/11/2009 15:50

By VinegarTits Sat 21-Nov-09 10:39:25
I reiterate 'Yeah, because the area she is from (not far from where I live, so I know it) is renowned for it's classy, caring, breastfeeding, attachment parenting and babymooning for optimal infant-mother bonding and general enlightened parenting. '

Just because someone chooses to parent differently to you GreenMonkies does not mean that they are not classy or caring or a good mother, your comment is nasty and bitchy and you are looking down your bitchy nose at working class mothers because you my dear are an out and out snob

Actually VinegarTits I am a working class mother. I was born in a council house, both my girls were born in a council flat (DD2 literally, in the livingroom) and I am not university educated etc etc.

By thesecondcoming Sat 21-Nov-09 12:25:38
i also think you (greenmonkies)are jealous of the fact that despite being working class/thick/poor she's now richer the Croesus.

I am not in any way jealous, we are financially secure, but not rich like the Rooneys. I'd rather have my life than hers, and espeically my DP than her DH!! And millions of £'s wouldn't change that!

I've been very simple and clear on this. I think it's somehow wrong for her to be out on the town 9 days after giving birth.

VinegarTits · 21/11/2009 15:57

Really Greenmonkies, what turned you into such a sanctimonious snob then?

VinegarTits · 21/11/2009 16:04

But what is wrong with leaving a baby for a few hours at 9 days old? will her fanny drop off and her breast shrivel up? will the baby be scared for life?

PoppyIsApain · 21/11/2009 16:06

Ive just skimmed the article so admit i may of missed bits, but it seems the mail were merely stating about her looking good enjoying being herself to celebrate the babies birth, i think the arsey mail were more trying to make people think bad of
Rooney due to his absence in the first weeks of babies life.

MoreCrackThanHarlem · 21/11/2009 16:16

Why is it wrong though?
What are your actual concerns?
You keep saying it's just 'wrong', but I haven't read one single reason to explain exactly why she is damaging herself/the baby.

BitOfFun · 21/11/2009 16:19

Posie,, when you say "My suspicion is that this is not the last time that woman will be out on the piss leaving her baby at home", it seems to imply that Colleen is somehow on a par with the woman who left her young kids alone in the house overnight in squalor to go on a binge. It is hardly the case here- I would have thought granny or whoever will be staying over in their vast pad and enjoying looking after the baby.

Honestly, some of the "My way or the high way" comments on here are plain daft.

GibbonInARibbon · 21/11/2009 16:54

Have just read the whole thread, open mouthed in shock at some of the judgemental, scornful and vitriolic posts.

VT is quite right Greenmonkies, you have to be the most holier than thou snob I have come across on MN for some time.

Shame on you for having no regard for the fact that some people have trouble adjusting in those first few weeks. Can feel overwhelmed and anxious. Who the hell are you to presume what a persons intentions are or how they were feeling?

Not often I feel really mad after reading a thread but this one takes the

mollyroger · 21/11/2009 17:08

I don't actually care whether colleen wanted a night on the razzle or to climb snowdonia 9 days after birth.

I am just feeling totally inadequate that anybody is able, let alone willing to go out so soon after giving birth.

I was in hospital for 4 days after ds1, and 5 days later was in agony from infected stitches and seeping breasts. With ds2, I was just beyong knackered, with DH being back at work and having a bay an a toddler..

posieparker · 21/11/2009 17:10

BOF...fucking hell that's some leap. Claiming that CR is en par with he woman who went on a binge for 24hours leaving her children alone. I was just insinuating that a parent that chooses, in what for most of us is the most crucial period of adjustment, to go out on a 'night out' is likely to continue going out throughout the child's life. To be frank I think that if you don't adjust somewhat to becoming a parent it's a shame. I'm not suggesting anyone should give up dreams or ambition when becoming parents ffs.

noddyholder · 21/11/2009 17:13

What has she done wrong? people recover from ops at different rates and I think she is wise to keep her previous life a bit alive from the start as it is easy to become just a mummy and there is more to life!

violethill · 21/11/2009 17:14

VT - that's the question nobody is actually answering isn't it?! What exactly is Coleen (or anyone else who isn't velcroed to their baby 24/7) doing wrong? How are they harming their baby? How are they affecting their bonding with their baby?

Reading some of these ridiculous vitriolic posts, I reckon some people already have shrivelled up fannies! Real old sour mouths!

Absolutely fine if you don't want to go out of the house. Absolutely fine if you do.

violethill · 21/11/2009 17:17

PP - why do you think a person cannot achieve successful emotional adjustment to parenthood if they leave their house without their baby at some point during its first two weeks of life?

You have made it quite clear that YOU couldn't achieve it without staying in. Why are you generalising from your experience that other people can't achieve it??

SixtyFootDoll · 21/11/2009 17:17
Biscuit
Defluffmyfanjo · 21/11/2009 17:33

Am 8 months pregnant. Wanted to b/f but after reading some of the nasty, vitriolic comments from the people on this thread who did b/f and who are so sanctimonious its putting me off totally.

If I b/f will I turn into one of these nasty snobby women?

Can't believe its 2009 and people are 'sickened' at a mother going out 9 days after giving birth.

Why don't we bring back the stocks or the ducking stool? And I love the fact that none of them can say WHY its wrong, it just doesn't 'sit right' with them. Let's hope that Colleen wouldn't give a flying f&^k what you think.

jujubean · 21/11/2009 17:34

I had a baby the same day as Coleen and I'm just astounded she had the energy to go out. I had a v.easy birth and at 10 days old I was just about ready to spend the day downstairs in my pj's instead of upstairs in bed. Mind you I'm breastfeeding, its sad that Coleen's not as she would be a brilliant role model for young mums. I think these days there is a pressure on women to 'get back to normal' after having a baby when in reality your whole world has been turned upside down. In my granny's day women had 10 days bed rest after giving birth then went home and had everyone look after them until baby was about 6 weeks old. Bliss.

muminthemiddle · 21/11/2009 17:35

I personally do not care when Colleen goes out.

There are far worse role models out there than her.

She seems like a decent person. It is her business as to whether she chooses to breastfeed or not, go out or stay in for the rest of her life.

At least she is in a stable relationship (oh married indeed!).
I wish I had looked that good after giving birth.

noddyholder · 21/11/2009 17:36

I think the idea that your whole world is turned upside down is behind the disapproval.It doesn't feel like that for some people She is obviously one of them

Portofino · 21/11/2009 17:41

I am gob smacked at some of these posts! Not one of knows this person and based on one dm article are making sweeping assumptions about her background, her parenting ability and her future intentions!

I normally get pissed off by posts stating that to bring up a child successfully you have to remain surgically attached til they start school and sacrifice you entire life - but some of the comments on here are disgusting! You should be ashamed!

VinegarTits · 21/11/2009 17:48

' in what for most of us is the most crucial period of adjustment, to go out on a 'night out' is likely to continue going out throughout the child's life'

Whats wrong with going out throughout your child's life? are parents not allow to have a break in your world PP? i went out when my baby was 7 days old (it was to Ikea but my baby didn't know the difference between Ikea and a concert)

I didnt realise once you have kids you have to give up your social life

Bloody hell i am going out tonight my ds is with his other parent I should be ashamed of myself not

posieparker · 21/11/2009 17:49

She's fodder for judgement I'm afraid, she makes the column inches, she could have discretely gone out but no. She went where she knew she would be photographed and had some point to make.