OK - it's the daily Mail so no wonder it's Judgy - Coleen Rooney

[DuelingFanjo]

out gigging and drinking 9 days after the birth

Is it wrong to be a little bit or mean to be even slightly judgy?

Or perhaps it should be more 'bloody good for her' ?

Oh, you're all right, I'm being unfair, obviously she has left the grandparents with several bottles of ebm (because at this age they feed every hour or so) and stayed on soft drinks so that she would be safe to co-sleep when she got home.

At 1.30am.

Yeah, because the area she is from (not far from where I live, so I know it) is renowned for it's classy, caring, breastfeeding, attachment parenting and babymooning for optimal infant-mother bonding and general enlightened parenting.

considering the baby is reported to sleep a lot and be very "good" I am not convinced he's breastfed or sleeping next to his mum, either in a Moses basket or in a sidecar crib. I'd put money on him being fed Formula on a 4 hourly routine and sleeping in a designer decked out nursery.

Feel free to flame me now.

But really, honestly, it sickens me that anyone thinks it's ok to go out like this 9 days after giving birth. It's wrong for a whole host of reasons, I can't believe anyone is defending it.

My dd was not feeding "every hour or so" at 1- days. She was bf and was feeding every three hours or so. Don't assume all babies are the same.

I knew there would be a thread about this, talk about the DM being judgey, MN is far worse. The baby will be fine. I hate this idea that everyone is the same after birth and you have to be lying on a sofa being a blubbering hormonal mess. SO the baby is left with loving, extended family, jeez, shoot Coleen now!

I left dd with dh when she was not much older than this, not for a night out admittedly but to pop out for a couple of hours to the shops and the library and y'know, get out of the house and have a bit of time to myself. It's not a crime y'know

10 days, not 1- days.

I found it more odd when Edith Bowman went off to Glastonbury not long after her section.

People are different though, just because I wouldn't do it doesn't make it wrong.

Good point about what expectations it will set for other parents. She does look good though .

But she could still be bf and have expressed enough for the evening. Even without staff to help I was expressing at day 5 and building up a supply in the freezer whilst my dd piled on weight. And CR has possibly had more cuddles with her baby than I ever gave mine at that age as I was juggling general housework / have we got enough nappies / food etc.

But, no, I wouldn't have gone out so soon, although I had cs's so I have no idea what its like to feel relatively normal after a birth.

Greenmonkies please could you provide a list of appropriate activities allowed 10 days PP.

Good for her - I remember my Dsis offered to take by DS when he was 2 weeks old for an overnight.
It was great, he was happy and cared for and I had an evening out.
It was no different than using a baby sitter, and it suited her better to have DS to stay over as she was minding her own DC.

I remember I did it for her many many years ago, when I was about 18 and living at home. Twas a nightmare, I hardly slept a wink, probably why I left it soo long to have my own DC!

mrsshackleton - Yes I agree it wasn't entirely helpful for our antenatal leader to encourage that. When the midwife visited me the day after I was discharged from hospital she told me to go up the high street the next day and have a coffee. I had lots of visitors and thought it was expected of me to be out and about when they visited. I was finding bfing really difficult and feeling under pressure to be socialising and going out made the problem worse.

Each to their own though if Colleen is happy having a night out there isn't a problem, she may not even be breastfeeding anyway.

Don't forget - this is Coleen's 'job'. She makes money from celebrity media, just as Edith Bowman made money from presenting Glastonbury.

I feel a bit sorry for both of them that they may have felt under pressure to put on a brave face and do something they might not have been completely comfortable with, for the sake of their careers.

Although I do take the point that it establishes unrealistic expectations for pregnant/new mums and their partners - this is one of my personal bugbears

I went for a night out 8 days after ds was born and it wouldn't have occured to me that that could 'sicken' anyone. I had the beginnings of PND and an evening with my friends being myself, rather than stuck on the sofa with my breasts hanging out, felt like heaven.

So what that she went out? So what if she is formula feeding, not co-sleeping blah blah blah. I am amazed by the number of people who think that their beliefs about parenting are the gold standard and that to differ in any way is to be doing it wrong.

I don't think going to a gig is part of Coleen's job really. Maybe she wanted to go to the gig and had arranged it ages ago.

She is 23 yrs old so she is probably at the optimal age for childbirth. 10 days after I cold barely walk let alone doll myself up for a night out. I take my hat off to her.

I do wish they would leave her and Wayne Rooney alone. She and he seem decent people who have made the most of their talent and made a shed load of cash. Good on them.

By LibrasBiscuitsOfFortune Fri 13-Nov-09 19:00:50
"Greenmonkies please could you provide a list of appropriate activities allowed 10 days PP."

Resting, healing, breastfeeding, staring at the new baby, resting, healing, breastfeeding, sleeping.........

By thedollshouse Fri 13-Nov-09 19:25:49
"she may not even be breastfeeding anyway."

I would bet serious cash she isn't.

By BettyButterknife Fri 13-Nov-09 19:27:56
"Don't forget - this is Coleen's 'job'. She makes money from celebrity media,"

She has other incomes, she presents tv, she has a perfume, a fitness DVD, a book and writes for magazines. And no doubt they will sell pictures of the baby to Hello/Now etc for a small fortune.

She's a massive role model, lots of young girls look up to her and aspire to be her, and this makes it look like you can pop out a baby and then just flit out on the town again. But for most people it's not like that. This idea that you have to get your life "back" makes it sound like it's ok to try to live the same way as you did before you had your baby. But it's not, once you have kids you have to shift your priorities.

To me, seeing Coleen out for a night like this makes it look like babies are something you simply hand over when they get in the way of your social life and this is not a good example to set.

"Resting, healing, breastfeeding, staring at the new baby, resting, healing, breastfeeding, sleeping........."

I seemed to be doing more laundry, cleaning, running around like a blue arsed fly type activities TBH. I would have preferred a night out.

As a total aside I wondered how come the NHS induced her at only 9 days over. They must have much earlier time scales than my PCT.

There might have been a medical need?

Yeah, that's what I was wondering (nosey).

I still don't understand the obsession with how the woman is feeding her baby though. Breast or bottle, who cares? Doing one or the other does not make you a better or worse mother.

lola infant feeding is a public health issue. I am not going to go into it all now, but (crap NHS bf support aside) the greatest number of women who choose not to breastfeed are those from the kind of background that Coleen Rooney came from, and those who aspire to be her. If someone like her were to publicly breastfeed (and I don't mean whip 'em out in public) then the Coleen Wanabees are more likely to consider it when they have babies.

As it is, by going out on the town 9 days after giving birth, and staying out until after 1.30am, she is actually showing these girls that it is ok to treat your baby like an accessory which you can chose to care for or hand over to grandparents as and when you feel like it. This example makes it look like you just carry on as before, no changes required, live your life as if you haven't just created a whole new human being.

But the truth is having a baby does change your life, and it should change your life, and if it doesn't, then perhaps all is not the way it should be.

I shall now

A friend of mine has just been to the ballet a couple of weeks after having her baby (perhaps the ballet is considered differently to a Beyonce concert?), as she had it booked for ages, went overdue etc. Her Dad looked after the baby and everything was fine.

However, there is no way in the world I could have done that for several reasons, and I am slightly jealous of her ability to cope! I think the same goes for Coleen Rooney - good for her. The only problem is the pressure it puts on young, new mums who think that this is the norm.

By the way, in my extremely high-brow copy of 'Closer' it states that she is living with her parents while Wayne is away footballing, has no nanny and that he does change nappies when around!!

So having grandparents looking after a baby for a few hours is "treating the baby like an accessory"? .

Of course having a baby changes your life but it doesn't mean you can never have a break.

I really don't get why people are so het up about this. She's young, had an uncomplicated birth (I assume, as she left hospital within 24 hours), has probably physically bounced back pretty quickly and is having a few hours out with friends. It's not against the law.

Incidentally, Wayne Rooney has just become a parent too, this life-changing event, any criticisms of him if he's seen out? Like when he played in the United game the day after the birth? No? Thought not.

So how do you manage to 'rest,feed, stare at baby' when you have dc3 or 4?
On day 2 I was up on the school run, the nursery run, shopping, back home, nursery pick up, home, play with dc2, school run.
Does that make me a bad mother..
Honestly GM you are delusional and judgemental.