How would you react to personal ashes buried in your garden?

[HonorBound]

how would you feel if someone turned up at your home and let you know there grandfathers ashes were buried in the garden. The grandfathers late widow buried him in the garden, even though that wasn't what he or his family wanted.

No one was allowed in the house after the funeral and the house was sold after she died

Oh and she hadn't told me upfront, I asked about the stone.

I would want to know before I purchased a house. I think it should be required to be declared before any house goes up for sale.

Any old house undoubtedly had people die in it, let alone ashes in the garden. It’s a very modern thing to die in hospitals.

We bought our house from an elderly man who’d planted a climbing rose in our garden in memory of his dead wife, complete with a memorial plaque. I assume her ashes are there too but didn’t ask during the purchase.

Unless they were put there last week, I don’t really see the problem. They’ll have blown away or got mixed in with the soil just like other organic matter in the garden.

Provided it was the ashes and not an actual body, I wouldn't mind. I wouldn't do it though because I want to take ashes with me when I move, not leave them buried in the garden behind. I've only got my cat's in a nice box and she's coming with me.

Logistically very hard to do. If the house is old you could have several generations of ashes buried there, plus the bodies of dead pets, but if the ashes were just scattered they'd be long gone.

How would that even be possible?

ashes are everywhere.

i would ask why they were telling me? Do they want them? Or want to say goodbye?

It wouldn’t bother me at all. I’d probably let entertain a conversation with the person as I’m extremely nosey but you shouldn’t feel obliged.

Ashes in the garden wouldn’t bother me.

Someone turning up at the house to tell me would bother me.

Why did he tell you, what did he want to happen?

My friend’s Mum’s ashes were buried in an urn in the garden. Several years later when her father went in to a care home they went to dig her up and couldn’t find the urn despite a stone allegedly marking the spot! Don’t know if they told the buyers!?

I would not be bothered about it in any way at all

My Mother scattered my Dads ashes in the garden, said they were a B**r to dig in

Mine are it seems to be flushed down a train toilet assuming there are any left that discharge on to the track...............

It won’t bother me in the slightest, in fact i’d think it was quite nice.

Warmly. But ultimately indifferent.

Ashes - wouldn’t bother me

As long as there’s not a body

Wouldn’t bother me. It’s perfectly possible there are burials of actual bodies in my garden. It’s only the far side of a (modern) wall from the ruins of an institution of a type known for undocumented burials, and when planning permission was granted for the site, there was a stipulation that a forensic archaeologist needs to be appointed for the entire dig, because they’re pretty sure to find human remains outside the set-aside burial grounds.

The ashes of both my late Dmum & Ddad are buried in the garden of the house they lived in for their entire married life.
We kept a small portion of the ashes back but 90% are buried in the garden.
We didn't tell anyone when we sold the house and TBH I can't see what difference it would make, we are never going to visit (which is why we kept a small portion back) and I can't see how they would ever find out. It is a huge garden and the ashes are buried under a favourite tree of theirs.

Wouldn’t bother me at all. I’d ask if they wanted them.

Really ? 🤔

Wouldn’t give a shit really.

Wouldn’t bother me. Two of our cats are buried in our garden.

It’s an urn buried next to the shed

Have you just moved in? If the ashes are in an urn I'd contact my solicitor and ask if previous owners want to retrieve them same as I would if they left any other personal items behind.

Then ignore and avoid getting dragged into this family dispute.

Scattered ashes wouldn't bother me at all - we are surrounded by old graves and many roads and houses are build over ancient burial sites.

Ashes, it wouldn't bother me per se, but I might be reluctant to dig that particular spot (if I hadn't already) for fear of disturbing his resting place.

Now if they'd said his body was buried there....

In that case I think I’d ask the relative if they wanted to dig it up and take it away. If they didn’t I’d probably put something such as a plant pot or water butt on top of where it is and leave it be.