How would you react to personal ashes buried in your garden?

[HonorBound]

how would you feel if someone turned up at your home and let you know there grandfathers ashes were buried in the garden. The grandfathers late widow buried him in the garden, even though that wasn't what he or his family wanted.

No one was allowed in the house after the funeral and the house was sold after she died

I wouldn’t feel anything.

I'd wonder why some randomer had dropped round to tell me that. And then I'd have a look to see if the plants were growing particularly well in that area.

Yikes that would unerve me! I once pulled out of buying a house because the vendor had buried her sister's ashes in the garden.

They've most likely disintegrated by now. It wouldn't worry me. Probably lots if people have scattered their pets ashes in thwir gardens. Unless it was an urn that wa buried. Then I'd want to know whereabouts.

My garden is very peaty. So it's literally all dead stuff. Someone's ashes mixed in with that wouldn't bother me at all.

My dad’s ashes are buried in the garden of my old house.

no marker just a cherry tree.

I doubt people would care.

The ashes wouldn't bother me at all.

However I would not want random family members turning up to "visit" the ashes and would make that very clear

In an urn , in a biodegradable container,or scattered . Scattered would not bother me at all and neither would it is the container had composted and the ashes had returned to the earth. In an actual urn, I am not sure . I think I would probably ask the family to retrieve them . If not it would be ok if they were far away from the house where I did not want to sit or garden .

@HonorBound

Do they want to get him back?

It wouldn't bother me. There will be thousands of UK gardens with pet burials, not much difference really.
I buried 2 lots of cats ashes last summer under an old rose tree they like to lie under. I have to say the roses were magnificent this year

Id let them dig him up (assuming he's in an urn rather than scattered). I wouldn't be allowing visiting if he was scattered, maybe once but not more. And then think no more about it.

Are they in an urn? Do they want them back?

It wouldn't worry me at all but if I had a relative's ashes in the garden,I'd want to move them if I were to move.

This is bonkers, if then vendor didn’t tell you how would you even know if there were ashes in your garden? Any house you buy could have them.

Ooh, We've been emptying the BBQ ashes in a corner of the garden. I do hope no subsequent owner thinks it's a 'burial site'

Alternatively, I might buy one of those twee 'gravestones' from a garden centre to put there!

Wouldn’t bother me. My mum, four cats, two rabbits and about a dozen reptiles are buried or scattered in my garden.

Really? Most unusual to bury ashes in a residential garden surely? I'd be worried about family keep coming back to pay their respects. I'd dig them out and scatter them somewhere else pronto.

Wouldn't bother me at all.

It wouldn't bother me. So many people's ashes are scattered everywhere if you think about it. I don't really believe the person sticks around or anything.

Case in point- my ex boyfriends mothers ashes are upstairs in my attic, in a lot of stuff I need him to come and collect at some point. That woman hated me. But her ashes have been up there ten years now so if she was able to haunt me from beyond the grave I'm sure she'd have done it already.

I suppose I might feel weirder about gardening and want to wear gloves to tend the garden but that would be about it.

Ashes wouldn’t worry me a jot.
Uninvited relatives turning up to see the spot would! Although I cant imagine they will come often? People don't tend to visit graves/ashes that much after the first few years in my experience, and ashes in a garden of a house you no longer own much less than a churchyard I’d have thought!

mummified remains in the attic - no thanks
ashes in the garden - no probs

I wouldn’t care about the ashes being in the garden
I wouldn’t be happy with strangers calling round to tell me that and trying to drag me into their family issues - not my concern. It’s not like I could dig up the ashes and return them.

I wouldn’t be bothered but they or any member of their family would not be visiting my garden.

I don’t know how many people actual do it (although as this thread demonstrates at least some people do!) but my point is it’s silly being freaked out by it because it could potentially be any house.

Edited as just read the second part of your post- how on earth do you dig out ashes?!

I'd think it was a bit strange they showed and up told me. What were they hoping to achieve?

She was buried in an urn, and there was a little headstone!