Is my mum allowed to pay for my weekly food shop?

[Smilingpeacock]

Hi,

my elderly mum has become obsessed with ‘off loading money ‘ before the government takes it. She gifts me 3k year etc, to be clear I don’t expect or need anything I am very grateful.

She now wants to start paying for my weekly food shop which is about £150 per week. We go shopping together every week and the plan from next week is for her to just pay both hers and mine shopping at the checkout. She seems to think that nobody will ever question this??

i’m always anxious about breaking the rules when it comes to. Money. Is her plan flawed?

My very elderly aunt does that. She takes out £100 a week that she doesn't spend, so that she can help/treat us and her great nieces and nephews whenever she wants.

What happens is that a persons cash reserves can and often will get used up before their most valuable asset, their house is sold. The local authority will set up a sort of agreement where they will ensure she still gets care but they will want paying back from the sale of house. So they get involved in money here. And do check for deprivation of assets/ cash.
Relevant only if in a care home or getting agency care.
The other situation where agencies can assess is if Power of Attorney is in place and active. If a bank or OPG thinks someone is financially abusing an elderly person they can intervene for example.

There is inheritance tax to consider but few people actually qualify for that.

You don’t have to go through the local authority for that.

Care homes do it, the advantage being it’s free (the LA only charges 1%, but still). We did it for my dad while we were waiting for the house to sell.

And they all they need is the deeds, to make sure that only that person owns the home, and any paper work if there is an outstanding mortgage.

Where I am, that stood for the care home and the LA. No one was looking at deprivation of assets at that point.

They just care about the value of assets at that point. They only start looking at deprivation of assets when you are expecting them to fund. It’s easy to prove you own a house and how much it’s worth; sadly, you just boil down to that at the end of the day.

They only cared that the house value was over 2 years of care home fees and was on the market immediately at the time when they went into the care home. (the LA didn’t care about that, the care home did. That particular one wouldn’t have taken him if he didn’t have 2 years of fees, but others would have).

I agree with you.
My husband's cousin is dying of mnd. She's trying to get her affairs in order and her lawyer is saying she's has to go through her accounts for the last 7 years and list all gifts. She is just above the IHT threshold so these gifts will have to come back into her estate when they do the IHT calculation. She's doing it now before she dies so that my husband and I who are executors don't have to.
In reality you could say it doesn't matter noone will notice it but the executors of your will are duty bound to go through your bank statements and look out for gifts. The fact is HMRC could come and do an investigation.
My husband found an old passbook of his mother's from 4 years ago, she died in 2023. He had to go through it and fill in another form for HMRC and there is more IHT to pay as she was giving money to her other son and it wasn't declared. (The money is coming out of his father's estate as everything was left to him anyway)
So yes you can get away with it but if the HMRC decide to investigate you then you can get in deep water

Alternatively, if you are the parent buying your daughter’s weekly shop, you make a list of monetary gifts for HMRC and just don’t put down the weekly shop.

If she had to have involvement from social care due to capacity issues, her buying your shopping could be seen as a safeguarding issue.

As pp said it's a food bill paid directly to the retailer she could take her to Harrods buy herself a two pounds buscuit and buy her daughter two hundred pounds of kit . No one will ever know !

Fair point. One reason why not would be to reduce risk.

True, but I think size of pot would have driven that conversation before IHT planning.

Just to add, if it’s withdrawn as income, tax paid as income, it would be hard to argue capital. Some providers are suggesting any amount goes.

I'm sorry but you are mistaken. The person you were replying to is correct.

"Regular gifts have no limit as long as it’s out of income"

[emphasis added]

Also, there must be no reduction in the standard of living of the giver.

It’s surplus income. She can spend it how she wants and on who she wants… Even if it wasn’t surplus income she can still spend her hard earned cash however she wishes. The LA don’t know any different as to whether she was helping her daughter out with a food shop each week or filling herself a trolley with caviar and champagne. And let me tell you the LA couldn’t care less either. You’re part of the well and truly scaremongered brigade.

Spot on. I currently, and intend on continuing to, pay for all DS outgoings while he’s at home (and likely when he has his own place too). All the money he earns he’s investing in LISA/S&SISA so future him is winning from time in the market and I can whittle down potential for IHT hit.