How would you split the cost of a holiday cottage for family. Per person or room.

[MeMyselfAndIris]

I’m looking at potential holiday rentals for family get together. Do you split the cost per person or per room. For example a single person in one single room V 2 parents and one child in one triple room. Also single adult in double room. The party is made up of 3 single adults all wanting own room, couple with child (who would also like own room but tricky due to expense) and another couple.

Sorry, you want to explain how 1 income supporting 1 person is more expensive than 1 income supporting a family of 4/5?

Yup. The couple with a 16 year old will find it far, far cheaper in a hotel room over having to pay either 2 fifths or 3 fifths (depending if 16 yo is charged) of a 5 bedroom holiday cottage while having to squeeze the three of them into one room, while the singles pay a pittance for the luxury of a double room to themselves!

I'd split per person but wouldn't include children sharing a room with adults.

I think for group holidays, the cost and value is in the shared time, not the amount of space allocated to each individual and it's unlikely you've found a place that is exactly what everyone would have chosen for themselves.

Per room if the rooms are similar sizes.

So you weren't joking? Bloody hell

Your choices to have a family are up to you. Single people are rarely single by choice.

Probably best you just go on holiday by yourselves because you don't sound suited to a group occasion.

Ah, so you just have a chip on your shoulder. One income per person is always better off than one income having to support multiple people. I'm sorry you're single, if that's not what you want, but it's not up to me to financially compensate you for that by repeatedly subsidising you. Pay your own way.

Most families don't have one income though.

Being single is very expensive. When DH died my income was halved, I paid more more tax (only one personal allowance) all my bills were the same, going anywhere cost double (no one to share fuel or accomodation costs with) and none of the 241 offers are any use to me.

Most families with dependent children have less than one income per person. Can you explain how it would be otherwise?

Being single may be expensive, but it's not my job to subsidise you. It is up to you to pay your own way. The expection that other people financially compensate you for your life not turning out how you'd hoped is wild!

The period when most families are dependent on one income is very short in the scheme of things, compared to a life time of paying all bills and other expenses on one income.

Hopefully it will never happen to you, but it came as a big shock to me just how expensive living alone is. And I know all about the cost of raising a family, having done that too.

Also, fuck me "life not turning out as I hoped"? My DH died!

Plus, single people without children are subsidising your family every single day.

Well said

So very true and I'm so sorry your husband died and there was a complete lack of empathy on here about that.

I'm sorry about your husband dying. It's a nightmare I don't want to experience and I'm sorry you're going through this. Still doesn't mean that I need to pick up a share of your bills though.

And let's be honest, the majority of singles expecting to be subsidised aren't widows. They're just single.

I'm not sure how single people are subsidisng me? We pay, in full, for everything, and get no benefits.

My taxes pay for the education I recieved and the healthcare I get, just as my children's future taxes will pay for theirs.

Surely that depends on the income and the family? One income of £25k supporting one person is very different to one income of £250k supporting two adults and a baby.

But an income of £250k supporting two adults and a baby is still less than an income of £250k supporting just one single adult.

Or are you somehow suggesting that single adults with no dependants are unable to earn as much as adults in relationships with children? I think it's actually the opposite tbh, having children tends to restrict earnings for the main care giver.

Yes, but my point is that you can’t say that a single person is always better off - it depends on the income. Incomes are not equal.

i actually think everyone should pay their own costs, singles paying for the full cost of their room and parents paying for their own children. Not sure many people agree with both on this thread, though, given the number of people who are saying pay per person excluding children!

I 100% agree with you that everyone should pay their own costs and those of their children in full. And, of course, families may choose to help out other particular family members if they earn less. But single people feeling entitled to be heavily subsidised by couples or families simply because they are single is utterly bonkers and hugely entitled.

I wouldn't charge for the child in that scenario. If they're sharing a room with their parents then just charge for the parents.

I've never asked anyone to subsidise me and un a group holiday situation, whichever "side" I was in I'd be happy with the arrangement which placed me in the worst position simply because presumably if I'm going on holiday with these people I like them and want things to feel fair for everyone.

Of course single people with no children subsidise families. Your children have never used the education system or the NHS? You've never had a free or cheap child's meal or free child's place on a holiday? Or a reduced price theatre seat or train ticket?

It's OK, I don't mind, it's all part of being a member of society but at least acknowledge it happens.

In the OP's situation I'd charge per person, excluding the children, becuase per room his highly unlikely to be equal either. Do you pay extra for the room with a view or ensuite, for example?

Everyone benefits from an education or the NHS, and everyone pays taxes to support that. Childless people benefitted from an education and from the NHS, and my children will pay taxes in the future to cover their usage (although actually they were educated privately and and covered by private health care so...) No one is subsidising my kids (apart from me). They will put into the sytem just like everyone else.

You will have benefitted from education, health care, child tickets etc. You're covering your costs, not my children's. They will pay their own taxes (likely more for less benefit tbh).

And no, we've never had a 'free kids space', not our thing.

Paying 'per person, except kids' is wildly unfair and means the couples are subsidising both the single people and the families. Per room, adjusted for size/facilities is the only fair way.

Well that's blatantly not true, current taxpayers are paying current education costs, just as current taxpayers are paying current pension costs. It's not a saving scheme.

Right, but every individual pays in, and every individual takes out. Yes, you don't put in in youth or retirement, but every individual contibutes throughout their life (or should). Presumably you'll want a state pension and access to the NHS etc in retirement? Who will be funding that? It's swings and roundabouts. The net result is that you contribute and you take out. You were a child once, right? Someone else covered you then, and someone else will cover you in retirement. It's how society works. You are no more subsidising today's kids that the adults at the time subsidised you when you were a child. You're simply paying back into the system for what you took out.

I'm not single. I've been happily married for 15 years.

But I have the ability to see further than the end of my nose with regard to the situations of friends and family.

I don't know what this attitude is that you're displaying but you seem determined that every financial situation should be turned to your advantage.

Nope. I just pay my way. I don't expect others to subsidise me or my children, and I resent the expectation and sense of entitlement from others who feel they shouldn't be expected to pay their own way.

FWIW, I'm actually quite generous and will often pick up the whole cost of a meal out or a weekend away. But that's up to me to offer. I don't like people feeling entitled to me picking up their share of the bill.

Per room