BIL using our bedroom for intimate purposes

[WhatTheMirrorSaw]

We arrived home from holiday last night. BIL has kindly been cat-sitting for us, popping in twice a day, but not sleeping here overnight. This is important.

This afternoon, I've been sorting out a few things in our room. The sun was shining in, and as it hit the mirror I could clearly see strange marks - handprints, quite high up, and what I think is a willy mark at hip height. They are quite noticeable, so I'm sure they weren't here before we went away.

I suspect BIL has been entertaining himself in our bedroom, either alone or with a partner. He's single and the thought of him bringing a hook-up into our bedroom makes me feel ill.

I've changed the sheets (just in case his activities culminated in our bed), but I don't know if I can bear the thought of him cat-sitting for us again if he does this. But DH will think it's strange if we don't have him back, and DCat has never been to a cattery.

Is there a way I can subtley dissuade him from using our home in this way, without offending him?

I've added photos, but they aren't very good because my phone doesn't seem to focus on the mirror surface.

So the saga continues!

Willy or won't he confess to nefarious bedroom shenanigans??

Is your BIL quite a young man? I think it would be very sad if he felt the need to be down, if you confront him about this. Does he live near you, or is your home in a new town for him? Maybe they have very different cultures where he comes from.

I'd at least give him three more opportunities to cat-sit for you - to see if he attempts the M, the C, and the A - before reaching a firm conclusion and making any accusations.

At least he wasn't facing the other way when writhing around in the nuddy and pushing up against the mirror - a damp skidmark would have been even worse.

Yes, this goes waaaaaay beyond merely awkward, if OP's suspicions are correct.

"Did you open my box of posh chocolates that were on the side and scoff the lot yourself?"
"Did you buy a premium blockbuster film and charge it to our YouTube account?"
"Did you borrow our car without asking and take it to do your weekly shop?"

........."Did you take all your clothes off in our bedroom, make sweaty love to our mirror, smooshing your slimy willy and goolies against it whilst in the throes of passion, and leave a human slug trail all across the surface?"

Is that ChatGPT's explanation of where the marks came from? It's very interesting but isn't AI just trained on what's already floating around on the Internet? Maybe there just aren't many willy marks on mirrors for it to be trained on?

No, never! 😮

“The zizi of the ‘uman male leaves a distinct impression on the surface of un miroir.”

@WhatTheMirrorSaw, yes those AI generated posts are really annoying, imo.
You know full well it was the cat and a hotdog.

A Willy mark?! 😂

Mmm, interesting... perhaps something to work through with a counsellor?

You are a better person than me, as I can see neither hand print or willy print. Just looks like smudges and your pareidolia has run wild.

Ha ha yes, I'm sure that would be entertaining! But I've decided not to mention the marks to either of them as the ramifications would be too much.

Of course. It's just an entertaining thread on MN.
Nothing to pursue.

Our house is very nice! Much nicer than BIL's bachelor pad, in my view.

He may think his place is nicer.

Er, no....I think you must be looking at a hand print.

The willy one is the long thick smudge.

I'm in two minds whether or not to mention it to DH at all. He's quite protective of his DB, and historically he's been very reluctant to say anything that might upset his family. The most likely outcome is that he'll be irritated at me for putting him in an awkward position.

Are you STILL not going to mention it to your DH, even if you don't plan to pursue it with BIL?

Yes, this is what I'll do, I think

What does M, C and A mean? Perhaps I shouldn't ask!

BIL is 38. He lives near us. It is a new town for him, but not a new country, and the culture is the same as where he and DH grew up!

No, I can't bring myself to mention it to DH. I would if it were anyone but his brother, but no matter how politely I phrase it there's no way I can tell him without implying that his bro is a wanker who has betrayed our trust and defiled our bedroom.

Anyway, I've cleaned the mirror now!

Thanks for your help everyone! I won't mention it to DH or BIL (sorry!) and will continue to ask BIL to cat sit, but I will:

• install a lock on our bedroom door
• install a kitty cam on the stairs and point it out to BIL

Yeah I don't suggest you tell your husband you saw some smears on your mirror and started picturing his brother's naked body thrusting against the mirror.

Y.M.C.A

😂 😂

I find it odd that you wouldn’t mention it to your DH.

If I found Willy marks on my mirror and I thought his brother had been the one to have caused them my DH would be the first one I’d tell.

Why are you nervous/scared of your DH’s reaction?

What are these “ramifications” that you think you need to avoid by keeping quiet?