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Original poster

BIL using our bedroom for intimate purposes

481 replies

WhatTheMirrorSaw · 03/08/2026 16:58

We arrived home from holiday last night. BIL has kindly been cat-sitting for us, popping in twice a day, but not sleeping here overnight. This is important.

This afternoon, I've been sorting out a few things in our room. The sun was shining in, and as it hit the mirror I could clearly see strange marks - handprints, quite high up, and what I think is a willy mark at hip height. They are quite noticeable, so I'm sure they weren't here before we went away.

I suspect BIL has been entertaining himself in our bedroom, either alone or with a partner. He's single and the thought of him bringing a hook-up into our bedroom makes me feel ill.

I've changed the sheets (just in case his activities culminated in our bed), but I don't know if I can bear the thought of him cat-sitting for us again if he does this. But DH will think it's strange if we don't have him back, and DCat has never been to a cattery.

Is there a way I can subtley dissuade him from using our home in this way, without offending him?

I've added photos, but they aren't very good because my phone doesn't seem to focus on the mirror surface.

BIL using our bedroom for intimate purposes
BIL using our bedroom for intimate purposes
Sensitive content
BIL using our bedroom for intimate purposes
OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
Calliopespa · 04/08/2026 01:06

ParsleySageToiletDuckAndBinBags · 03/08/2026 23:42

Phallus Screw the Looking Glass.

Ah Ha ha HAAAAAAA! 😂😂

Calliopespa · 04/08/2026 01:07

12234m · 03/08/2026 20:21

🤮🤮

why on earth did you think anyone would want to see photos? 🙄

If you are an adult, use your words and speak to him.

In fairness, sometimes there are no words ...

Calliopespa · 04/08/2026 01:12

Growlybear83 · 03/08/2026 21:05

🤣🤣🤣. This thread is totally bonkers! I thought I’d seen it all on Mumsnet, but I never thought I’d see the day when someone would be posting about supposed Willy marks on a mirror.

Show quote history

It is a bit surreal. I'm trying to imagine seeing those marks on my mirror and immediately thinking: "BIL's willy!"

Calliopespa · 04/08/2026 01:16

cloudtreecarpet · 03/08/2026 22:15

But he might not have been in the bedroom at all - it's probably just her oddly fertile imagination...
Ps I didn't get you were tongue in cheek, sorry

Show quote history

"fertile" alright ...

Calliopespa · 04/08/2026 01:17

cloudtreecarpet · 03/08/2026 22:19

Oh no, don't come to the OP with an actual logical explanation!!

She prefers to be imagining her BIL squashed up against the mirror, covered in lube, leaving an anatomically impossible imprint of his willy.

Show quote history

She prefers to be imagining her BIL squashed up against the mirror, covered in lube, leaving an anatomically impossible imprint of his willy.

This is kind of what it comes down to op ...

Calliopespa · 04/08/2026 01:18

WhatTheMirrorSaw · 03/08/2026 22:41

That's a very good point...if he was having some solo fun, there would only be one hand print on the mirror.

Unless he uses both hands interchangeably, so the propping-up hand doesn't get tired?

Or unless he did in fact have company, which is a horrifying prospect.

Show quote history

Unless he used the mirror as his "third hand"?

Which would explain the otherwise not very convincing smudge.

Calliopespa · 04/08/2026 01:20

WhatTheMirrorSaw · 03/08/2026 22:47

Thank you, that's a very thoughtful offer!

Show quote history

Maybe just ask BIL to measure up against it. If the shoe fits ...

NotMeAtAll · 04/08/2026 02:05

OP, do you normally fantasise about your BIL writhing around your bedroom while oiled up?

Ayarreet · 04/08/2026 02:43

LadyBeatriceBeaHiggins · 04/08/2026 00:25

The willy aspect is a wet flop @WhatTheMirrorSaw

Based on these photographs alone, it is not possible to identify the exact cause with certainty, but the marks do have characteristics that make some explanations more likely than others.

General observations

The surface appears to be a mirror viewed under strong directional light. The white areas are not sharply defined scratches or chips; instead they appear as films, smears, or residue sitting on the surface, visible because the light is reflecting at a shallow angle.

The marks have:

  • Diffuse, cloudy edges rather than crisp boundaries.
  • Curved and elongated shapes.
  • No obvious cracking pattern.
  • No radial fractures that would suggest impact damage.
  • No evidence that the reflective backing has failed (which usually produces black or permanently transparent spots).

Likely causes

Hand or finger oils (Most likely)

The second image especially resembles a partial palm or finger contact that has dried and become visible under grazing light.
Human skin leaves:

  • oils
  • sweat
  • salts

These residues often become almost invisible until sunlight or a bright LED strikes the mirror at an angle.
Probability: High

Cleaning residue

Another very common explanation is:

  • glass cleaner allowed to dry
  • soap residue
  • detergent
  • microfiber cloth residue
  • hard-water minerals

These frequently produce cloudy patches exactly like those shown.
Probability: High

Condensation marks

If someone touched the mirror while it was damp (for example after a shower), minerals from skin oils can remain after the moisture evaporates.
Repeated condensation can make these marks progressively more noticeable.
Probability: Moderately high

Cosmetic or aerosol deposits

Products such as:

  • hairspray
  • deodorant
  • perfume
  • furniture polish
  • air freshener

can settle on nearby mirrors.
These deposits are often uneven and create cloudy shapes.
Probability: Moderate

Transfer from another object

The elongated mark in image three could be from something soft resting against the mirror, such as:

  • clothing
  • towel
  • rubber item
  • packaging

Pressure can transfer residue without leaving sharp edges.
Probability: Moderate

The third image

The third photograph is the most interesting.
It shows several parallel streaks with a wider translucent area. That pattern is consistent with something being wiped across the surface while a residue remained behind.
Examples include:

  • wiping with a damp cloth that contained detergent
  • wiping over greasy fingerprints
  • wiping before the cleaner had evaporated

The streaks are much more characteristic of a cleaning action than an impact.

Edited

AI posts get on my nerves.

Ayarreet · 04/08/2026 02:45

NotMeAtAll · 04/08/2026 02:05

OP, do you normally fantasise about your BIL writhing around your bedroom while oiled up?

Trying to do a penis beaker 🙄

CypressGrove · 04/08/2026 02:51

Calliopespa · 04/08/2026 01:12

It is a bit surreal. I'm trying to imagine seeing those marks on my mirror and immediately thinking: "BIL's willy!"

Show quote history

I'm imagining the OP doing one of those ink blot tests 'that's my BIL's willy' for each one.

AlwayAnxious · 04/08/2026 03:12

Hay... How was the week? .. Cant wait to view the Cat Cam, cat gets up.to the funniest things in the bedroom, it really makes us laugh. Want to come round on the weekend and we can watch together?

rwalker · 04/08/2026 03:31

Some one single with the run of an empty house
of hell bring someone back for a shag if he has the opportunity don’t be so naive

LarkspurBlues · 04/08/2026 04:46

If it’s the picture I think, then you’re imagining he has gigantic balls and a spindly dick like ET’s finger. Yes?

Lifelover16 · 04/08/2026 05:16

DeathBanana · 03/08/2026 17:40

You need to get your spy kit out. Dust for fingerprints and check its not yours / your dhs

I mean he could have been having a wank / shag against your bedroom mirror but there are about 400 other plausible explanations.

Dust for fingerprints? And Willy prints ????

Empress13 · 04/08/2026 06:11

Call the police to take DNA samples of said Willy against your mirror🤣

GalaDinner · 04/08/2026 07:34

To avoid embarrassment, just ask him to draw round his erect willy and compare it. That won't feel awkward at all.

MargoLeadbetterisQueen · 04/08/2026 07:44

rwalker · 04/08/2026 03:31

Some one single with the run of an empty house
of hell bring someone back for a shag if he has the opportunity don’t be so naive

An "empty house of hell"? Well, maybe the decor isn't to everyone's taste, but that's quite a strong description.

MargoLeadbetterisQueen · 04/08/2026 07:45

Me too, @Ayarreet
@LadyBeatriceBeaHiggins, why did you post all that?

2O26 · 04/08/2026 07:45

GalaDinner · 04/08/2026 07:34

To avoid embarrassment, just ask him to draw round his erect willy and compare it. That won't feel awkward at all.

Nope, not awkward at all. Just a regular, everyday thing.

RowsOfFlowers · 04/08/2026 08:05

Honestly — this is one of the most ridiculous threads I have ever seen. Unless you directly ask him, which it sounds like you will not, you are never going to know. At the moment, it’s all speculation. What is the benefit in knowing other than it embarrassing your BIL? Just drop it and move on.

If you really can’t move past it, then you’ll have to say he can’t stay over anymore and find a new cat-sitter. Cats don’t actually 100% need sitting. Most people have friends or family drop in to check in on them, feed them etc. so there’s not a huge need for him to stay while you’re not there anyway…

cloudtreecarpet · 04/08/2026 08:18

@WhatTheMirrorSaw
Come on now, fess up, this was just a joke thread to make everyone laugh wasn't it?

It was a great thread, very funny, so thanks for the laughs.

VideoVox · 04/08/2026 08:19

Charlize43 · 03/08/2026 22:23

Could it have been a gay orgy? One of those flash things that goes viral and 74 gay men might have turned up for an orgy in your bedroom, with one of them being pressed up against the mirror due to massive overcrowding.

How do you know it is your BIL's willy? Have you measured it?

You have to quite admire him for organising such a successful event.

CatLandOffTheA3 · 04/08/2026 08:26

Clean the mirror and say and do nothing. Next time, strip your bed before you go. You need a cat sitter in the future right? Just leave it.

Tryanalogue · 04/08/2026 09:16

LadyBeatriceBeaHiggins · 04/08/2026 00:25

The willy aspect is a wet flop @WhatTheMirrorSaw

Based on these photographs alone, it is not possible to identify the exact cause with certainty, but the marks do have characteristics that make some explanations more likely than others.

General observations

The surface appears to be a mirror viewed under strong directional light. The white areas are not sharply defined scratches or chips; instead they appear as films, smears, or residue sitting on the surface, visible because the light is reflecting at a shallow angle.

The marks have:

  • Diffuse, cloudy edges rather than crisp boundaries.
  • Curved and elongated shapes.
  • No obvious cracking pattern.
  • No radial fractures that would suggest impact damage.
  • No evidence that the reflective backing has failed (which usually produces black or permanently transparent spots).

Likely causes

Hand or finger oils (Most likely)

The second image especially resembles a partial palm or finger contact that has dried and become visible under grazing light.
Human skin leaves:

  • oils
  • sweat
  • salts

These residues often become almost invisible until sunlight or a bright LED strikes the mirror at an angle.
Probability: High

Cleaning residue

Another very common explanation is:

  • glass cleaner allowed to dry
  • soap residue
  • detergent
  • microfiber cloth residue
  • hard-water minerals

These frequently produce cloudy patches exactly like those shown.
Probability: High

Condensation marks

If someone touched the mirror while it was damp (for example after a shower), minerals from skin oils can remain after the moisture evaporates.
Repeated condensation can make these marks progressively more noticeable.
Probability: Moderately high

Cosmetic or aerosol deposits

Products such as:

  • hairspray
  • deodorant
  • perfume
  • furniture polish
  • air freshener

can settle on nearby mirrors.
These deposits are often uneven and create cloudy shapes.
Probability: Moderate

Transfer from another object

The elongated mark in image three could be from something soft resting against the mirror, such as:

  • clothing
  • towel
  • rubber item
  • packaging

Pressure can transfer residue without leaving sharp edges.
Probability: Moderate

The third image

The third photograph is the most interesting.
It shows several parallel streaks with a wider translucent area. That pattern is consistent with something being wiped across the surface while a residue remained behind.
Examples include:

  • wiping with a damp cloth that contained detergent
  • wiping over greasy fingerprints
  • wiping before the cleaner had evaporated

The streaks are much more characteristic of a cleaning action than an impact.

Edited

That’s a bit of a damp squidmark.

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