Are you a mum of grown up boys?

[meringuenests]

Do your sons' partners laugh at you being indulgent towards them?
mine occasionally chuckle at me being CLASSIC boys mum 😀

I suppose the thread title is bad enough. Should be are you the mum of MEN 😀😀

I am not sure what a classic boys mum is. In what way do you indulge them?

What’s a classic boys Mum?

I’m a mum of a 15 year old boy. Don you mean we are supposed to be more indulgent towards boys? I really try not to be as I don’t think his future partner will be happy about this! Or he may end up living alone and needs to be able to look after himself.

I don’t know what a ‘classic boys’ mum’ is.

I don’t treat them any differently to daughters.

@meringuenests can you explain more?

21 year DS who has a lovely gf and I don’t know what classic boy mum behaviour is either?

I think you need to give examples, but don’t all mums spoil their children, male and female.

I’m guess you’re disliking what they’re laughing at, and feel a bit hurt, while they may see it as banter.

Just over fussy. Like an Italian mama I suppose. Sorry. Thought it was a recognised thing

Why does being a boy make a difference?

No because I wanted to raise an independent capable son who didn’t need to be mummied by women. You are not doing your future DILs any favours.

I've seen plenty of examples of mothers thinking their sons are the best thing since sliced bread and treating them like princelings, even when they reach adulthood. Perhaps it's an opposite sex thing.

What’s a classic boys mum? Honestly never heard of it.

My boys are all adults now and married. I certainly don't 'fuss' over them. They ate all independent- if anything they fuss over me as I am a widow.

Yup. Little Lord Fontleroy get everything done for him and it annoys the hell out of his gf.

No. I treat mine the same as I treat my adult daughter.

Maybe mums being over-indulgent towards their adults is one reason why so many men are so useless and entitled…

No
Absolutely not
Its how men become toxic and entitled

Ahhh you are Italian. I understand now. You probably do the same as my mum for my brothers. Things she does is say things like “oh my boy you work so hard let me help” and then she’s there cooking up a storm for my poor brothers and his family because he’s been in work (their wives love it). She’s always telling them they are so handsome but need to eat more 🤣 if they go on holiday when they get back she won’t knock the door but she will leave “supplies” outside the door and text and say that it’s outside, things like milk, a home cooked dinner, some homemade bread etc. when one of her grandchildren are sick then oh my god she’s there agin with the supplies, inputs that brothers and his wives jobs are so important and she will take care of the ill grandchildren. My brothers say no more toys etc yet when my mothers takes them somewhere and the kids say they want something she gets it anyway and says to keep it at her house 🤣 where as with me as a woman she asks my permission for all the above but she sort of tells my brothers that’s what’s happening and they let her 🤣

I have 4 adult sons and I don't behave like this at all. I treat them as any other adult, I have certainly never overindulged them just because their are male.

I only have boys so can’t compare my parenting them to girls. I still worry about them in their twenties but neither are spoilt brats, entitled or part of the manosphere, so I guess I got the right balance of love and boundaries. I’ve never treated them like little darlings who can do no wrong, if that’s what a classic boy mum means?

So she has the courtesy to ask you but not her sons or her daughter in laws. Do you have DC will you treat them differently when they are adults

Is there a ' classic girl's dad' ?

I was raised in a family that prized boys, the only girl with 7 brothers made my life miserable.

i raised my sons to be strong and independent, they can all do house maintenance as well as house work, they can cook clean and manage the accounts, my daughters are the same quite capable of decorating and checking the oil in their car.

my DIL’s say that all of my children can wrap me round my little finger and maybe they are right I am rather a people pleaser, but then my DIL’s are family too and I would do anything for them. In fact my eldest son’s partner (and the youngest DIL ) teases him and says she’s my favourite 😂

Are you Jackie from Friday Night Dinner 😁

No, I actually find the opposite. Having been determined not to raise them to be useless husnands and having them do their share of chores etc right up until they left home, I am horrified how much their girlfriends enourage useless male behaviour, with all the aw bless, he's a man what do you expect attitude, and how comfortable they are letting these women do everything for them.