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Life tips for the soul

60 replies

Slottiethesluttie · 11/07/2026 21:05

If you’re really and truly happy and fulfilled in life, please give your top tips and how you got there.

(I’m 49 and just feeling meh lately)

OP posts:
permanently · 12/07/2026 16:46

Go vegan and alcohol free on a detox for 28 days. The world will feel more positive then.

SaraHoliday · 12/07/2026 16:48

Good thread. Thanks OP x

PurpleCoo · 12/07/2026 16:53

Balance

Think about what is important to you and what gives you joy. Letting go of the things that don't really matter. Not relying on others to give you what you need, but letting others into your life to share it with.

Compromise. I would love a big house by the sea, a stone cottage with a rambling garden. But I would be away from my family, and no doubt need a mortgage in order to do so. To have a mortgage would need me to work full time and travel less.

I opted to stick with my two bed miles from the sea ex council house, do it up nicely, but be mortgage free, work part time and travel lots. I can't have everything but I chose what gives me the most balance and best quality of life. I don't need a bigger house, or to keep up with the Jones'. It does me fine.

Wishitwasstraightforward · 12/07/2026 17:11

” Make a list of all the times in your life when you have been happiest and notice what makes them so in your memory. People? Places? What was going on for you then? Were you learning new things? Enjoying the excitement of the unknown?
Grateful for relationships/community around you at that point? On the edge of a new adventure?
Notice and ask questions of yourself then and now. Be honest. Can you spot any patterns in terms of what you need to thrive and what is perhaps missing for you now?” This is great advice especially if you are finding it tricky to pinpoint what gives you joy or makes you feel alive.

At a time when I felt a bit lost I also found it helpful to give some thought to what made me happy or excited as a child or teenager. My list included my cat, swimming, Indie music, sherbet, reading, dancing and a hammock. I’ve added all these things back into my life and they have bought me so much joy. Obviously we all grow out of, or away from, some of the things that worked for us in our past. However for me it was very helpful to think back without judgement to what made me happy before the pressures of being a certain way kicked in…..

Slottiethesluttie · 12/07/2026 18:08

permanently · 12/07/2026 16:46

Go vegan and alcohol free on a detox for 28 days. The world will feel more positive then.

Pretty sure that would finish me off. I love wine and meat!

OP posts:
Luvnhugs · 12/07/2026 18:23

Slottiethesluttie · 12/07/2026 18:08

Pretty sure that would finish me off. I love wine and meat!

You would be surprised OP.

DH & I decided to give no weekend reward wine a try just to see how it felt. That was 3 months ago & for us it's been a great decision especially regarding sleep. I'm out like a light within minutes which hadn't happened for a long time. I wish we had made this decision a long time ago. Now I realise you don't need alcohol to enjoy life or for celebrations. Everything you do with it you can still do without it. What a revelation 😄

Netcurtainnelly · 12/07/2026 18:31

Practice Gratitude. Three things every night you are grateful for in the daytime just gone. Say out loud or write down

herbetta · 12/07/2026 22:17

Slottiethesluttie · 12/07/2026 14:51

Yes, over last few months. I am on HRT - hadn’t considered it something you can just ‘up’, I thought it was a standard dose!

Nope we are all different & have differing requirements plus we absorb differently too - sometimes depending on the formulation.

Often we start HRT whilst in peri & still have some of our own Oestrogen left. Some of us need a higher dose or formulation change to top up the further missing Oestrogen. They pretty much always start you on the lowest dose.

ViciousCurrentBun · 13/07/2026 07:16

One of my favourite t.shirts has the immortal words ‘ say no to doing things’ emblazoned across its chest. Now I’m a great believer in trying as much as life has to offer but don’t do things just to please people if it’s an inconvenience to me.

Too many people do things they do not want to because they worry about offending, letting people down, etc.

CypressMoon · 13/07/2026 07:30

Every day, focus on and take pleasure from things that are simple or free: birdsong, sunrise and sunset, the shape of clouds, dogs zooming across the park, the shifting seasons - flowers, baby ducklings, autumn leaves, frost. There's so much beauty all around.

Take pleasure in things you already have in your life, and pay more attention to them: the taste of fresh tea or coffee in the morning, clean sheets, listening to a favourite song, reading a good book in the bath or curled up in bed.

Make small changes - they give you a fresh outlook - move the furniture around sometimes, or put different clothes together to create a new outfit from your existing wardrobe.

Do things you want to do but put off for no good reason. A life-long friend of mine became a poet who often performed in the town where we grew up. I always meant to go to one of his readings but it was a long way to travel and we'd sort of lost touch, so I didn't. Then he died unexpectedly young. The first time I heard his poems were at his funeral. They were brilliant and I wish I'd been able to tell him that in his lifetime. After the funeral, I made plans to meet up again with old friends instead of putting it off and now we see each other regularly.

Also, I really am not happy all the time. A lot of the time I have post-menopause meh. But I do try to keep returning to the small, easy ways to find happiness.

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