Help me not to tell DP it's his own stupid fault

[Kingfisherfly]

And offer words of encouragement.

First I'll say I don't have a perfect driving record and have points on my licemce, from doing 27 in a 20 limit without realising it wasn't 30.

DP has done similar, although this time it was 72 in a 50 (not 70) limit. He was pulled over by a police officer on a motorbike, who he felt enjoyed his job a little too much, and is incensed that he was only going at the speed of the traffic, why him etc (yes, I know I'm taking that with a pinch of salt).

Beyond that he's worried about what it will mean re points and/or a ban, mainly because of how it will affect work.

He wasn't given any paperwork at the time, and hasn't received any yet. At what point does he tell his insurance company?

And what will likely happen next?

Edited because I misread.

I think some posters are being a little hysterical here 😂

Insurance don’t need to know anything at the moment as there’s nothing for them to know - until he’s actually been convicted and receives points/a fine, it’s all hypothetical and they won’t be interested.

For 72 in a 50 he’s likely to get points and a fine - unlikely to get a ban even with other points on his license. When he does get a conviction, that’s when he rings insurance and is probably hit with a huge increase to keep his policy or told they can no longer insure him (which will be a real ball ache).

Which his all is problem.

72 in a 50 zone, he needs to be told what an idiot he he. Why think he needs coddling?

Aye I think the speculation on here is silly. No one knows what the letter will say, just wait for it to arrive and go from there. And then get proper legal advice of who needs to be told re insurance.

Surely in the insurance form you don't put how many points you have? I've never had points so I don't remember declaring it. I know you put the licence number in and maybe it gets checked that way.

I know it's not the point but around me the motorways go from 70 to 50 to 70 not for safety but for air pollution purposes. It's perfectly safe to go at 70 if the traffic is flowing at that speed but obviously when you get caught that's the risk you take. Some areas by me are enforced and other areas at different stretches of motorway it's only temporary signs. The local drivers literally decide it's optional because they know it's not enforced for air pollution in those areas. I'm not saying it's OK I'm just saying it's the reality of my local motorway. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I don't think he needs coddling. He's been told off by the police he'll have to deal with the consequemces of the court, what is me adding to that going to gain? Why would I want to make him feel worse?

He answers the questions honestly.
Do you have driving convictions? — No, if he hasn’t actually been convicted.
Do you have any pending? Yes

Read the small print - do you have to tell them if you get a conviction?

As others have said, expect a court summons.
What he gets in terms of points, if that makes him a totter, possible ban and amount of financial penalty will depend on various factors.
This will include how long he was speeding for, if he was driving dangerously in any way etc.

But best case scenario would be a big old fine.
Worst case will be a disqualification. You can generally shorten this by taking (he'd have to pay for it) a does awareness course.

I've seen several websites that have different info than that posted above. They class anything that is 21 or more miles over the speed limit as a Class C offence.

Edited to add: I don't think there's any value in adopting an "it's all your own stupid fault" approach, especially as you don't have a clean licence yourself - bit hypocritical. The punishment from the authorities will be difficult enough.

When I got stopped for 72 in a 50 I got 3 points and £100 fine. It was a proper traffic car though sitting on the motorway with the speed gun out for the sole purpose of issuing fines and it was issued at the time.

He's worried about having a ban hanging over him if he's got say 9 points. I.e. one more offence would mean a ban.
That worry is easily solved .... all he has to do is stick within the speed limit.

He needs to get rid of his boy racer car .... often they go with boy racer attitudes.

Why try to stop yourself telling him it's his own stupid fault? It is.

Speed limits are there for a reason ... to prevent death and injury ... the sort of injuries I saw day in and day out whilst working with people with brain injury. Whilst he is fretting about points and fines and bans, he should be thinking about the misery that is caused by his sort of behaviour.

He sounds like a danger on the roads and deserves whatever he gets .. he’ll have to wait and see, no point guessing. Hopefully he’ll learn his lesson before he kills someone!

It’s too fast for a course but within the threshold for a fixed penalty. All being well that’s what will happen.

So you won’t be impacted potentially by him not being able to drive? By his ability to work severely impacted? By the financial implications of premiums rocketing?

I’d ring your insurance don’t take a chance presuming
ultimately if you have an accident they check absolutely everything and it could invalidate your insurance

a quick google search says this is what he’ll get

4 to 6 penalty points and a fine amounting to roughly 100% to 150% of your weekly income, plus a potential 7 to 28-day driving ban.

he’ll struggle to get insurance

72 in a 50 is 3 points and a 100 pound fine. The starting point for court action in a 50 is 76.

https://library.college.police.uk/docs/NPCC/Speed-enforcement-disposal-guidance-2025.pdf

Page 6

Well, having someone he loves and respects tell him what an absolute bellend he's been might get him to actually reflect and change his behaviour more than some random police officer and a hefty fine.

More to the point, it'll mean you're not lying to him, which is also important. I love DP and support her in almost everything. But if she doesn't something stupid and dangerous, I going to tell her she's a tit for doing something stupid and dangerous.

His finances don't impact me.

Some people do love a bit of doom and gloom. He's input the details into the renewal portal on the assumption that he gets 6 points, to see what the impact would be. Yes, it's going to cost him, although not as much as you might think, but there's no suggestion that they wouldn't insure him.

Do you live together?

If it goes to court 4-6 points or a short disqualification. Band B fine which is 100% of weekly income, reduced if he pleads guilty.

If you're struggling not to express you annoyance , maybe something like " What a nuisance, I can see you are/you must be really annoyed at yourself."

To give him the chance to vent but just listen neutrally and don't actively pander to his excuses.

Don't say anything more exonerating than "well that's a lesson for all of us".

I suppose what I'm saying is try to coax him round to taking responsibility for his own part in this, and "manning up" rather than making him defensive which will be counterproductive.

If he goes to court tell him to dress smartly, a suit if possible, be very respectful, express his guilt and apologise for the offence and for taking up the court’s time.
Do not make excuses as to his speed or mention the police officer.

What’s your experience with this?

Wrong quote sorry