Tutor turned up at my house at 9.45pm over a negative Google review – what would you do?

[Booyou123]

Hi everyone

I’m still quite shaken up by this and would appreciate some thoughts and perspectives.

My son attended a private tutor for about a year at the start of Year 5 for the 11 plus exam. After we stopped using her services, I left an honest Google review based on our experience. It wasn’t abusive or offensive, just a negative review.

The tutor was extremely upset by it. She repeatedly called me and my husband, sent so many emotional voice notes and messages, and even contacted my sister-in-law (who also has used her tutoring services) multiple times because she knows her. She told my sister in law that if I don’t take the review down, she’s calling the police as I am violating her business.

The part that has really terrified and shocked me is that she then turned up unannounced at my house at around 9.45pm. She was banging on the door and windows, demanding to speak to me about the review. She was absolutely hysterical, crying and sending me messages begging me to take the review down.

My children were in the house and ran upstairs because they were scared. My son was crying and very frightened, and asked why his teacher was there banging on the door.

I called the police afterwards and was advised to document everything. They couldn’t deploy anyone as they had some major incident in Woolwich, London. They told me that if there were further incidents, the behaviour could potentially amount to harassment.

Since then, she has sent a message apologising for coming to my house, saying she will never do it again and won’t contact me further.

What is bothering me most is that she only knew where we lived because of her professional relationship with our family. I can’t get past the feeling that using a client’s address to turn up at their home over a Google review is a huge breach of professional boundaries, maybe even DBS and goodness knows what else.

Part of me thinks I should just accept the apology and move on. Another part of me feels this was so inappropriate that I should take it further. She’s a woman who runs a professional tutoring company, and she was completely unhinged.

What would you do in my position?

When the 11+ system was standard, this is what used to happen. And children took the exam in their classroom. You could opt out, but it was normal to do it. Tutoring was rare.

When the grammar systems were largely abolished you then had to opt in. But because the number of grammar places were far fewer, they became more competitive and tutoring was done to give children an advantage and cover work no longer covered as part of the curriculum.

I'm talking state grammar here, not private school.

None of this would make it okay. Leave your personal life at home.

OP - leave another review. Save anyone else the pain of having to suffer this batshit cow.

This. I’d also tell her I saved the voice notes and wouldn’t hesitate to share them as appropriate if she contacted me or my family again.

If you tutor in a small community, it could well do. Word of mouth travels. I don't have to advertise at all or recruit because I get so many word of mouth referrals.

One of those going bad could shoot down all of my new intake for September.

What I have learnt from this thread is - you must never leave a bad review for someone's service, even if it is bad, because of (add long list of spurious/ made-up reasons). And even if the service was actually just bad, it was most likely your own fault because of (made up reasons/projection).

The salient point to me would seem to be that no matter what, if you are working with children, you don't turn up at their house at night and rant and rave outside the door. That person I wouldn't want any where near children, no matter what.

Ah ok, thank you. I'm not that au fait with state grammar as we don't really have them anywhere near where I live. That's interesting.

@Booyou123 are you saying that she knew your address through privileged information from working in a school and she accessed this specifically so she could come to your home and harrass you? If so, that's a GDPR breach, which is why you may have mentioned it earlier. It all really raises questions about her DBS and suitability to work with children.

I kind of feel this depends on what the review says…. “We didn’t like her”, no, I’d agree, most people would overlook that. “We found out she’s a criminal and responsible for human trafficking” - I could see that ruining a business…!

Obviously I highly doubt that’s what the OP wrote in her actual review!

Yes, this was more or less my point too: the content of the review is relevant up to a point.

I assume the review was note factual than the vagueness posted here (to avoid us finding the review)

if it was posted as the vague statement why would that seem incredibly bad -most would just ignore it. So it must have been specific to merit such a bad reaction.

did the 15 missed calls that night of the review posting happen sane night as tutor turned up? As seens unlikely to have had an actual impact on the business in those few hours.

We don’t need more information, even if she’d left a review saying she boiled children alive and ate them, repeatedly calling threatening police action and turning up at OPs house are unacceptable.

@bigboykitty She runs a large tutoring company and she has our address on file from when we enrolled in September 2025. Our address was on the invoices she sent us etc.

I am guessing she used that information to drive down to our home last night.

It’s scary to even write it.

OP, how would you feel if you were the next parent and hired her without knowing that she had behaved like this?

That you had given her access to your child and home?

You emailed your concerns.
She chose to ignore you and them.

Only when you put up a factual review did you get a reaction.
She chose to react like this.

Her behaviour was completely unhinged.
Terrifying your children?

I would not be letting this go for another family to experience.

I use Trustpilot all the time.
I put up many great reviews.

I received faulty goods, got the run a round for two weeks.
Within one hour of a stinker going up I had a detailed apology, a full refund in my account and a request to take it down.
I didn't.
I amended my review and added in that within one hour of posting my review on TP, the matter was now resolved.

Fxxk taking it down. Far better to make it clear that this is what it takes to resolve a complaint over them delivering faulty goods.

An apology is fine for a rude email response, NOT turning up at your home in a deranged manner terrifying your children.

You've done your bit. She says she won't contact you again. I'd leave it there.

Nutjob. Tell everyone you know.

I too had to sit an equivelant to the 11+ in my last year of primary in the 70s The results of that were used to "stream" you in the comprehensive you went to (as by that time the old Scottish High schools had been abolished).

Streamed comps were actually not a bad idea, as it meant classes were made up of kids with a similar level of intelligence and there was also the ability for a kid to be moved up or down classes.

It even meant I got to learn Latin, at my comp in a very working class area, which surprises a lot of people 😂

Definitely. She could do this again. Probably has done it before.

A bad review isn’t slander.

No, it’s libel if it’s unjustified. I’m extremely cynical that it was true and unbiased to cause such an extreme reaction and for the reviewer to be so reluctant to communicate about it.

This thread is bonkers. I suppose Mumsnet has a lot of Mumpreneurs. You know, the dog walkers, tutors, cake bakers, face painters, gift basket curators, mobile nail technicians, pet sitters who rely on good reviews.

I personally dislike today's review culture and online rage and fuming. It's so easy to vent online and pfft someone's reputation and work.

However, these online feedback options do exist and businesss need to ensure they know how to manage their reputation. Best is to take feedback on board and saying we are sorry to hear, feel free to discuss and your feedback will be considered. The worst is for business to start retaliating and arguing 😂talk about shooting yourself in the foot. I recently decided to chose a certain local business based on the reviews and against another due to their more concerning reviews. If you write a factual review it's ok to be critical, just don't slag them and vent your anger, that's just unpleasant.

I can't quite get a feel if OP is unreasonable or not. The tutor made a huge mistake in paying a visit scary but OP is quite cagey and sounds annoying, so maybe both at fault.

I am confused.
It now seems that the company is not just a one man band it is a large company with multiple tutors.
Who did you complain to? the head or the tutor?
Is the tutor also the head of the company? which was alluded to upthread?
Was it the tutor that arrived at your door, or was it the head?

I left a bad review with my dentist (old) when a £5K bridge operation was handled by an under qualified staff member and not the dentist I was quoted for without prior discussion with me just assumed and put on me where I felt I couldn’t refuse and also mixed messages as to the other dentist doing the work, otherwise I’d have gone elsewhere. I think they responded but can’t recall. Damned right I was going to complain!

Well done for leaving a mixed review.

Not necessarily.
WH Smith did books of 11 plus practice papers at that time. I know because I was made to practice at weekends.

I only ever leave a review if I truly believe a sole trader, restaurant, or a business, deserve 5 stars and nothing less. Saves a lot of bother.