How attractive do you think you are?

[Electriceelslunch]

Inspired by a conversation I had about the sub Reddit ‘Rate me’ where people put a picture of themselves up and ask strangers to rate them out of 10 based on how physically attractive they are. Screams of either insecurity or narcissism to me, but got me wondering - how physically attractive do you think you are? What would you rate yourself out of 10? How did you arrive at that number? Eg. What evidence do you have for it? Do you think you’re average or above or below average? Do you think most people perceive themselves as more or less attractive than they actually are? Most of the time, are you happy or unhappy with what you see in the mirror?

how physically attractive do you think you are?
I've gradually started to appreciate my body more these days so I think I look pretty good.
What would you rate yourself out of 10?
I'd say 7-8
How did you arrive at that number? Eg. What evidence do you have for it?
It's just my opinion...my partner would say 10 every day (for me)
Do you think you’re average or above or below average?
If average is 5 then a bit above average.
Do you think most people perceive themselves as more or less attractive than they actually are?
Depends on the person, but I think we are our own worst enemies and pick out every flaw, every wrinkle, every spot, every grey hair that everyone else wouldn't notice unless they were looking at you with a magnifying glass.
Most of the time, are you happy or unhappy with what you see in the mirror?
I can happily say that, for the first time in my life, I don't actually hate what I see when I look in the mirror. I'm 36, soon to be 37, a single mum to a 4 year old, working full time and training for my first half marathon. I focus more on what my body can do rather than what it looks like.

Mid fifties, towards the upper end of the scale of attractiveness . Namely I can see I present as attractive, and men and women have told me throughout my life. My daughters school friends when at that young impressionable tween age decided I was the prettiest school mum sigh, still get it from men and women now.

however I think much has to do with grooming and presentation. I’m slim and toned. Long legs and relatively tall. I dress well, always with current styles, but my way, and in good quality well fitting clothing, I’ve a lot of hair, and good skin and know how to do my make up in a natural way to enhance Yes I’ve what would be considered a pretty face, but that I think is a small part of it.

I think it’s the overall image people see that they decide is attracrtive, the clothes, hair, skin etc,

if I went out make up free. If I cut my hair short and didn’t style it, let the greys come through, didn’t condition it, if I wasn’t toned with muscle defijtion and carrying a belly or big matronly boobs, if I dressed in clothes that were poorly fitting and poor quality and dated, then I am absolutely sure I’d be considered much much less attractive.

i think attractiveness is much about grooming and presentation.

I personally think I look absolutely gorgeous but I don't expect others to share that view. I don't care what others think of my appearance, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. When I look in the mirror I love what I see and I always have. I don't understand why everybody doesn't feel like this (or at least try to feel like this).

I reckon I look better to men than women because women have sometimes seem surprised by the amount of attention I get. I don't get so much now - I don't know if that's because I'm older and look less attractive or if it's because I'm settled / in a different line of work and not out in situations where men would approach me. I can tell you that I don't care either way.

We have one face/body and it's completely unique, we should treasure it.

Probably a 3 . I wish that was body dismorphia talking, but I think I’m probably right

I think it's important not to think about it that way.

In the 6th form I read The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf and I can't remember the contents, but what always stuck with me was that it's completely false and harmful to link your value to your visual attractiveness. Those feelings must be disconnected.

The world will judge you heavily on your face and body (more than I ever realised aged 16), and I fell into the usual trap of "performing femininity" with makeup etc, but at least I partly knew I was doing it for the benefits/avoidance of rejection or attack for being "ugly".

But we must try to push back, to really believe that we're important regardless. We will all end up looking like old ladies (which is fortunate! many don't make it) and if we fetishise youthful beauty we are heading for an emotional car crash.

I’m 62, can’t take HRT, everything is heading south apart from my boobs which are surprisingly good for my age. I’ve never considered myself attractive but I’m told I am.
My DH still thinks I’m a 10 and he’s the only one that matters.

My super power is my smile, my natural openness and my inability to flirt so men are much more comfortable around me. It is a much bigger threat to other women.

As women we spend most of our lives preoccupied with our outward appearance, it’s not until they fade that we realise that what attracts others to us is much deeper.

It's kind of funny, though. It beats all of the, "I think he's cheating on me as I'm reading this text from him to this girl and they're saying they love each other but I'm not sure," posts.

And, rogue attack dogs coming out of lavender bushes to devour the elderly.

Or whatever else nonsense. May as well add this to the headliners!

when up younger and up until 35ish very and I knew it. I enjoyed it at the time being attractive and using my attractiveness

now not really and mostly I don't care that part of life is in the past. People warm to me in a different way to when I was younger

I have always been told I am beautiful, attractive etc even now I’m 50 people think I’m 10 years younger and say the same but I think I’m about a 4 or 5. I don’t think I’m totally ugly but I don’t think I am that attractive sometimes I think I have some type of face dysmorphia otherwise everyone is lying.
I heard something not that long ago which does make sense - that I don’t think I’m pretty because I am not my type

It would be funny if it wasnt for the fact people DO actuallly judge appearance of themselves and others in numbers.

I think back to the 1970s when women actually fought against the beauty cattle market - disrupting the Miss World and other demeaning so called " beauty contests"

Yet here we are in the twenty first century and some people are still rating looks in terms of numbers. Still colluding with societies made up view of what they think women should look like.

It’s a bit difficult to put people into such a small scale I think. I’d say I am very conventionally attractive and people’s reactions to me agree with this. I am often the most attractive person in a room. I was particularly admired in China and Japan for some reason.

But put me next to Margot Robbie or Maura Higgins and I’d look like a cave troll or their munter little sister. So perhaps in my town I’m a 9 but in LA I’m a 4? So it doesn’t really work.

Going on what my boyfriend says very attractive. However if you compare me to the Botox, Filler, fully groomed type I’d say I’m probably not that attractive.

I do try to dress well though.

Interesting because not everyone finds the 'Botox, Filler, fully groomed type' attractive.

I guess it proves beauty really is in the eye of the beholder.

In my head I am a 6. In the mirror a 5. In a photo 3 at most.
But I really don't care!

Having lost 4 stone over the last 18 months, I think I look fucking great.

I read research that externally rated average/unattractive people tend to overestimate their attractiveness and attractive people tend to underestimate.

When younger, a 10. These days, a 2 on a good day.

I'm absolutely gorgeous.
You know Margot Robbie? I get mistaken for her on the regular. 👱‍♀️

I’m probably a 7 compared to other women my age. If we’re measuring against all women I reckon I’m a solid 2.

I'm in my 50s.
Old, tired and appearance ravaged by menopause and ill health.

I was pretty in my 20s.

I know I look shit and avoid photos, mirrors etc I would say 1 or 2.

It's all about individual tastes, and as someone who tends to be unimpressed by many celebs people find attractive, I don't think you can rate people on a number system.

I'm attractive enough to be ogled by men at the supermarket on a regular basis, but considering men, that doesn't really narrow it down a lot, does it? I'm mostly very happy with how I look as someone in my late thirties who doesn't bother with make up (although I'm trying to put on some weight as I'm too thin at the moment).

But as I'm married and my husband thinks I'm very attractive, I don't really care what the rest of the world thinks anyway.

About a 5. I don’t think I’m disgusting but I don’t think I’m a naturally really pretty person either. I feel better now I’ve lost weight but I don’t wear make up daily even though I know I look better with it. I just can’t be bothered. I’m probably the most comfortable with myself I’ve ever been.

I find this sort of view odd, and wonder if it’s resentment or lack of knowledge.

Human beings have always revered beauty. From when time began, history records show women adorning themselves multiple centuries ago, physical attractiveness and others reaction to it.

Is ultimately what enables the species to survive. Rallying against it is like complaining it rains. It will always rain. Beauty will always be revered, becaude it is what allows us to survive and procreate.

Which is why so many ugly people die alone, without procreating... Except they don't! Plenty of unattractive or downright ugly people have very happy marriages, and children.

I don't think beauty is what 'allows us to survive and procreate'.

(And I think youth, or the illusion of youth, is probably more universally revered than 'beauty' - although often the two are conflated.)

I'm fit as fuck. Solid 10.

Seriously though, I don't think I'm conventionally pretty, and never have been. And I don't photograph well.

But experience tells me some people find me attractive, and when I'm feeling confident I certainly seem to be able to charm people. And occasionally have been called beautiful.

But if I posted a pic online, I suspect 90% of male strangers would be a bit 'meh'.

I'm generally happy with that.