Will you provide regular childcare for your grandchildren?

[GranparentChildcare]

For those of you that have kids.
Are you going to provide regular child care on a regular basis for your grand children.

Not 'instead of nursery' care as when we are finally free of elderly parents and child responsibilities DH and I would like freedom to do some more holidays etc while we are still young and fit enough.

But ad hoc bay sitting or emergencies yes.

Possibly a day a week but will depend on if I am still
working and how many DC my DC have. Would prefer to have them regularly (monthly) at a weekend.

I work full time in a senior role - and do not plan to retire early so it’s unlikely

Yes my mum has done for me so I didn’t have to send them to nursery and I will for my daughter God willing so she doesn’t have to send theirs to nursery. I don’t find little children always easy, but for the close bond and the small joys I’d happily sacrifice some of my own comfort for that. I’d still be alright to go on holidays if I wish and we’d sort out the practicalities maybe both of us work part time. Family is very important to me. Grandparents who say “I’m not helping” lose out on closeness with their grandchildren

Yes, 100% . I’ve not had much grandparent childcare for my DC and it’s been very hard - I know a lot of people are in the same boat too.
Ill want to be with my future GC, and ill also wants to give my DC a break too so that they can sleep/go out/have a movie night. I wouldn’t be able to have them in the week when my DH is at work (I have a disabled DC who is going to need care even as an adult) but I will certainly offer a night every weekend when my DH is home and any other time when he’s home too.

Not even babysitting for a date night? A sleepover? Covering in an emergency?

I work full time and DD lives a 4 hour drive away so "no" would be the answer to the question.

No. Ad hoc and emergency care only.

I hope to be travelling the world. Raised my own kids myself.

There are too many unknowns to be able to answer this because I don't yet know when dd will have children or where she will be living etc. I also don't know what my health will be like at that time.

If I'm still in full time work, separated by physical distance and/or not physically fit enough to help out on a regular basis, then obviously that will impact on what I'm able to do. However, I will certainly do whatever I can to help out to the best of my ability at the time.

I don't really understand grandparents who choose not to help on principle, but each to their own, I suppose.

if they ask
i would love to

Probably a day or 2 a week if my kids have theirs young / we live in the same country.

If they are the same age as me then i'll be 80 so unlikely to be able for a 13m old!

I would have thought you of all posters- with that user name- would be tired of parenting. 😀

But more seriously, why is it hard to understand that GPs may want their own lives?

No. Ad hoc and emergencies only as per what we had. Too much of a commitment otherwise.
I saw too many beleaguered GP (usually women) pushing prams and standing in the school yard looking utterly bored and resentful every week.

Absolutely not! Raised my own kids as a single parent with no help so absolutely know how difficult it is! But I’ve done my time.

By the time I have grandkids I’ll probably be retired, travelling and living my best life. Don’t want to be restricted to promising one day a week or whatever.

Although saying all that I’d definitely be available for a week here and there in school holidays and cover for sickness (if I’m retired). And will always be up for a weekend.

But ask me again when I’ve actually got grandchildren, it may indeed be a different story ;)

No for me
and my husband doesn’t for his sons child

he could if he wanted to as he’s retired and very active and fit
but the other grandparent is doing 2 days a week and they are having another one as the eldest will be In school by and they just assumed that the other grandparent would look after baby no 2 because they look after baby no 1

they have said no they can’t do it because they are buying a house with their new partner and it’s caused a massive family row

so Im glad we never got involved with childcare

Yes. As a child I used to sleep at my nan’s every Friday night so my parents had sat mornings to themselves.

when I had kids, my mum looked after my kids two mornings a week and Friday nights.

I work 4 days, so when my children have kids I fully expect to look after the grandchildren on my day off / school holidays and of course Friday nights.

it’s such a lovely tradition. I / my children found growing up that it gave you a relationship with your grandparents that didn’t go through your parents. I was always closer to my nan and she was a confidante to me, my mum was to my children and I hope one day I’ll be able to be that safe space for my grand children too.

I would, but I doubt it will happen. I suspect dd won't have kids. Ds probably will, but he is unlikely to live near enough to us to make it practical (we live in the rural NW and he wants to be a barrister and will probably head to London).

Yes I would, for either child, whatever they needed. It would be an honour to be asked. I wouldn’t want them to miss out too much on the time themselves though, so I would hope for them it would be as minimal as possible only so they don’t miss out themselves.

I would also be fully prepared to take them on full time if my child was hospitalised/both parents died or something horrific like that. I’ve never forgotten how my grandparents stepped in when my mum almost died when I was 10 and my brother 7, we moved in with them for 2 months and they did everything like parents. I felt really looked out for and they provided so much stability, love and reassurance whilst our mum was recovering in hospital.

Also, I have decided not to offer any regular childcare after all the moaning on here about unequal childcaee for siblings. If I offered equal childcare to both I might well be looking after kids in my 80s.

I would certainly consider doing it but it's likely that they'll all live too far away for it to be regular as my DDs have settled on different parts of the country due to their careers. I'm a bit sad about that but I'd try to make up for it by being a regular visitor if I'm retired by then.

It depends where they choose to live at the moment. I’m in the middle of the country so everybody’s got the options available to them to come up and down to visit me. They dont.
Currently, I’ve got two in the north and two in the middle
At least one of the northern ones I think will have children, which will make it difficult.
I’m already having to think about my housing arrangements so that I can have them come and stay.
Realistically, best I could only offer two days a week if I wasn’t working.
I’m willing, but I don’t know how practical it is

Emergencies of course.

Happy to help occasionally but I won't be doing regular childcare. I'm still working myself and I'm busy most days. I watched my mum look after my sister's children full time at 70 and it was just too much

I fully intend to offer childcare for both my daughters, fingers crossed they feel secure enough with the world to have children themselves.
My parents barely offered even the most basic odd night out baby sitting so I know the struggle of managing without them, also how although my girls love them, don’t exactly have alot of memories or experiences with them; (which is not just childcare, but not alot of time spent together generally.)

I would if they asked. I doubt we will live near each other though.