What is your biggest wedding regret?

[TeaAndSymumthy]

Trying to gather some information on what people regretted most about their weddings (excluding maybe who they married 🤣)

things like, not hiring a videographer, over spending, uncomfortable dress, venue?

what did you regret about your wedding?

Zero regrets. It was a simple day with great food, lots of wine and dancing with all the people we love.

Letting my father walk me in. I wanted Dh and I to walk in together but caved to pressure from outside and have regretted it ever since.

Also Mil was insistent on certain people being invited or not. We should have ignored her.

Moral of the story - do it your way!!

Getting married on my birthday.

And going on honeymoon next day...having to leave venue at 5am...everyone stayed all say ..had breakfast, chilled then had lunch todsy and remininsed about the day...we missed out!

No real regrets. It was 36 years ago, so things were very different.
I'm delighted that there was no video - they're awful and intrusive.
I'm delighted there was no "evening do", as I think they're grim.
I suppose, ideally, I'd have had fewer guests - ditched all/most of the family members I felt obligated to invite, and just stuck to friends.
I'd do it differently now, and make it more relaxed, but only because fashions have moved on.

Just echoing other comments to say the groom first time round
Second time round I got an upgrade! No regrets other than 15 years later wishing we’d had a video as quite a few guests have died since then

I wish I had booked a Child care provider to attend the wedding and look after my then 2 year old. I couldn’t quite relax and it was a long day for him.

Not hiring a photographer (we couldn't afford it). My FIL took one lovely photo of myself and my husband and we have another one of when everyone was throwing the confetti, but that's about it.
Asides from that the day was magical, but I just wish we had more photos of it to look back on.

that it took place 😅😂

Similar experience with photographer. Our chosen photographer told us that he was unable to photograph our wedding due to a "personal reasons" but said that he had a replacement lined up for us - we were so relieved we went with them - huge regrets - quality of photography was very amateur. We should have researched alternatives ourselves.

I was married 25 years ago before phone cameras - if I was going it again I would like at least one of my friends to have captured my DF do his speech - I can’t recall what he said (apart from it was lovely) because he did it off the cuff (my Mum had died) just before. It would be lovely to play it back, that said I wouldn’t have wanted a video of the entire day. We had a small beautiful day and the best thing is I chose the right man

Don't regret a thing. Ours was very (very) budget indeed and we were glad not to get into debt.

I had cream patterned flat lace up boots with satin laces ( nicer than it sounds) and ooh a top hat - quite fashionable at the time - late 90s!! Great thing was my feet were comfortable all day

Snap, I also got married on my birthday.
The good thing is my husband has never forgotten our wedding annivesary.

Letting MIL come

Assuming people can do the basics. I assumed hotel coordinator woukd nake sure everyone sat on right sides. Instead they didnt bring in tge guest to the room until maybe 10 miss gegore I came in ended up a free gor all - my now husbands family all sat on my side (not intentionally) which neant my aunts&uncles - tge peopke I wanted up front ended up in back 2 rows on his side!! There were empty seats on his side n first couple of rows so do not rely on people to do basics. Appoint someone to make sure people sit in right place.

Only married recently and am so upset that this basic rule of bride/groom sides was not followed by anyone and the people I wanted near me were stuck down the back

Not arriving in a nice car. My DM and DDad did not have a great relationship ( even though they were married until his death) My mum more or less took over the arrangements and I let her ( another regret). My dad wanted to pay for the wedding cars. She thought they were a waste of money. The cars were the cars of family. They were just bog standard boring. But that was just one part of me not having any control over the day- mainly my fault because despite being a nearly 30 year old woman at the time, I should have said no a lot more.

I wondered at the time of I would go on to regret our very low key wedding, but 17 years later I don't at all, it remains the most fun day ever.

We had 9 guests - no flowers, no photographer, no cars, no hair and make up. I had a very simple dress (though still white, long, and off the shoulder), and Puma trainers. We had breakfast all together in a local pub, then DH went with his family to get ready at our house, whilst my parents and I went to a local hotel. We hailed cabs to the register office, and then again to the bar we wanted to go to (we hadn't booked, just turned up). Cabs again to dinner (our one expensive treat), and then got the Tube home for cake (not a wedding cake, just a bespoke sponge cake).

I was pregnant, didn't want the day to revolve around waiting around and drinking. We wanted it to be very London and it was.

Two days later we hired a pub function room and invited our friends for an afternoon celebration.(Got the Tube there in my wedding dress again). Then a few close friends came with us to another bar and then out for late night burgers.

I'd do it all exactly the same again!

Absolutely!

I said no videos and I've never regretted that. I look bloody awful on videos. At least you can pick and choose the photos you look nice on and throw the others away (these days, delete them :) !

Two things - well three. Two dresses were in the running and I should have gone for the other one. The one I was pushed into choosing by my mum and the lady selling it was far too fussy for a venue wedding.

Second/third, we had lots of our parents' friends there. It was all very silly and we should have said no to some of them. But conversely we invited a couple of parental friends just for the evening and they really should have been invited all day especially as one of them is still friendly with my mum and sees her regularly and has helped her this year when she had an accident and couldn't' drive for a bit.

Not making sure we spent the day together. He went one way and I went the other! The best part of the day, apart from the getting married bit, was catching up over a Chinese takeaway in our room later that night!

My H won’t watch our lovely video - we got married in gibrakter and just had a reception for the 7 of us on hotel terrace and then all were given £100 to go to the casino for a meal and play - problem is his mum who died only 64 is on it all and it upsets him - so I’ve not watched it for 20 years now!!

Inviting a family we knew who didn’t show up. They claimed illness but I later found out that it was because they were staunch Catholics and didn’t want it to get out that they’d attended a divorcees wedding!!! I really wish they’d just been upfront from the start as I would have respected honesty and wouldn’t have had 4 meals go to waste and a massive gap on a table!

I also wish we’d had food all day or some canapés or something. I didn’t think we’d need it but the ceremony was quicker than we thought and then there was too big a gap between the ceremony and the meal and everyone got a bit too drunk as a result! Great memories though!

The groom - if I knew then what I know now….

My dress and my hair. I picked a dress my mil liked I wish I picked the one I wanted. My hair was up and I hated it. I didn’t feel like me. Everything else the important bits were perfect just wished I felt more glam. )I had only given birth 3 weeks before hand so my appearance was different from my normal body etc)

I wish I'd paid for a proper photographer. I thought family could take decent photos and they couldn't and there was no proper composition of photos.

I wish I'd had a proper church wedding with the big dress, everything rather than the small register office ceremony we had. I should have gone for the full wedding thing rather than trying to keep it simple.

I still regret these things even though I'm now divorced. I'm not likely to get married again so I can't do it all over and a lot of the people who were at my wedding are now dead so some decent photos of them would have been nice.