I've focused on this issue because there have been important court cases and proposed legislation. I started thinking about it because I have PTSD and can't share loos, changing rooms, or other intimate spaces with men, including transwomen. They trigger a trauma response. At first, I thought it would simply be a matter of everyone agreeing on what, to me, seemed an obvious need for separate facilities for transwomen and for women who needed or preferred spaces/services without transwomen. Instead, when I tried to explain why I can't share spaces with transwomen, I was called a transphobe, a bigot, told to get over my trauma response, told that I was a bad person because of my trauma response, and other things that indicated that I was the problem and a very bad person.
It was cruel. There was no empathy at all for my disability. Many feminists, who should understand trauma responses since they're common among women who have been sexually assaulted, refused to listen to why people with trauma responses can't just get over it or that it's an autonomic response that has nothing to do with how we feel about transpeople or men.
The response to lesbians who didn't want to have a relationship with transwomen was pure rape culture. Once I saw that, I noticed how a lot of it is rape culture: men feeling entitled to women (and their spaces, bodies, time, etc.), anger at women's boundaries, an attempt to destroy our ability to say "no" and to punish us for trying. I don't understand how any feminist can support it.
@Smurfetteto
You say
Transwomen, those who don't wish to be gender normative, do need protection though whilst we figure this out!
What about women like me or other women who can't share single sex spaces or services with transwomen? What are we supposed to do?