Receiving Disturbing Cards

[Circularspandex]

Name changed because it's outing.

DH and I have been together for twenty three years and have two teenage children.

Last year, about a week before mother's day, I received a mother's day card with my name written inside and then a heart. Nothing else. I didn't recognise the handwriting. It was posted from a city which is at the other end of the country (NE and I live in the SW). My street name was misspelled on the envelope.

I was freaked out by it, but ignored it after a while.

We've been away this weekend, but have just found another one in our letterbox. Similar To My Mother card, with my name and heart. Written in the same green pen, it seems.

This time there's no address, stamp or postmark on it, which is really worrying. It just has my name on her front. Unfortunately our Ring doorbell has run out of battery and we haven't charged it.

Do you think I should contact the police? DH thinks I should, but I don't want them to think I'm wasting their time.

I definitely do not have any other children.

How old are your children? Very likely it’s one of your child’s friends if they are now adults (and suffering poor mental health)

if it was me I would assume it was my horrid SIL, just the type of psychotic shit she would do. Any chance you also have a cunt for a SIL?

When you moved into your house, were the buyers or sellers well-behaved or did anyone piss anyone off in the process?

Is there any chance that your mum could have a secret extra child, and they’re trying to (extremely weirdly) prepare you for the day they rock up at the door, or prompt some reaction from you telling your mum?

Or something prompted by one of those DNA connections on genealogy websites? Are you on any, or are any of your family? Not saying it’s the correct connection at all, but wondering if someone’s got the wrong end of an online stick?

That is weird. Personally, I would contact your PCSO. They will know if anyone else locally has reported a similar thing, unlikely but possible. And then if other weird things happen, you'll have it recorded.

DC are thirteen and fifteen. I really don't think it's one of their friends.

I do have a SiL, but she's very normal! She also lives in SW and wouldn't send anything like this. I have a brother who certainly wouldn't either.

I've been lucky enough to have only had two pregnancies which have resulted in my two DC.

Have a look on FB and search anyone that may have the same name as you, they may live in the SW also? My 1st thought that someone has tracked down their birth mother and have mistaken them for you.

I think if it was a crazed stalker they are not likely to just send a card once a year.

I'm sure my mother didn't have any other DC. Just me and my brother.

There were no issues at all when we bought the house, many years ago.

I could be mistaken identity, but I wonder why they were the cards anonymously.

It isn't a police matter OP, though it is certainly strange. You haven't been threatened in any way. Most likely the sender has you mixed up with somebody else, or maybe it's a prank of some kind.

It is probably someone trying to contact their birth mother. You say you have an unusual name, maybe it’s all they have to go on.

My brother was contacted by a lovely sounding 15 year old who thought he might be her father. She asked if he remembered meeting her mother in a city a long way away 16 years previously. He knew he hadn’t ever been there and couldn’t be the child’s father but he wrote her back a lovely supportive letter.

You can’t do that with the info you have. I think I would have to get to the bottom of it. I would go full Miss Marple.

I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about. It’s probably just Norman Bates.

I dont tihnk you are being dramatic at all. id be very unnerved by this. we never throw a single piece fo paper out (which is a problem in itself) so id still have the card. I think I would be inclined to g too the police actually.

That is absolutely bizarre. Ruling out it being a 'joke', I think it can only be one of two options:

1. Mistaken identity
2. Someone is fixated with you

Do you work/have you worked with any vulnerable people who might see you as a mother figure?

It's definitely unnerving and the mystery of it would drive me insane. How frustrating that the doorbell didn't capture it 😬

Even if she had, don’t you think she’d remember birthing another baby?

💯agree

I don't work with young people or vulnerable people and really can't think of anyone who has shown an unusual interest in me.

When I over think, I worry it's some sort of veiled threat on my children. The fact that this person is now geographically closer than they were a year ago scares me.

I am a catastrophiser and a worrier though.

My guess is someone was adopted at birth and has limited information and has mistakenly identified you as their birth mother.

As I already explained, I'm an alcoholic and didn't fully take in the first post. Thank you

Yep, this would be my guess. It’s very easily done with records so easily available on the internet, and if you get one fact wrong it will send you down completely the wrong route.

It would unnerve me too OP but tbh I don’t think the police would do anything. Just ensure you have a ring doorbell for next year

My guess is it is someone thinking that they’ve found their birth mother. Especially as you’ve got a relatively unusual surname; they might think that it’s you because it must be as your name is unusual and who else could it be?

They also might have written little because they lost their nerve, had a name change that would mean nothing to their real birth mum? I could imagine if I found on a census or electrol role or whatever someone with the same uncommon surname that it must be them.
If it’s not a prank.

X post

You didn’t have an abortion years ago and this is someone from your past who disapproved of it?

This is what came into my mind, but OP says she's only ever been pregnant twice - both resulting in her children.

I agree with this, or someone who was taken into care at a young age/went NC/ their mum ran off, and she had your name.
Sadly one of my uni friends had his mum abandon him (left with dad) age 2. He had no idea what she looked like but did used to check Facebook now and then for women with her name (never found one afaik)

Green pen = poison pen. It is a deliberate choice, it's definitely unnerving.