Girls at DD’s school cannot wear socks because men and boys feel uncomfortable

[Eastie77Returns]

DD’s school has placed a ban on girls wearing socks due to persistent issues with girls wearing skirts that are too short and not the school’s regulation kilts. According to the e-mail sent to parents, girls wearing socks with said short skirts has resulted in some “members of the school community” feeling uncomfortable. When the issue was raised further by some parents, the (male) Deputy made it clear that it was essentially unfair to male pupils, and presumably teachers, to be made to feel awkward when girls undergarments were visible to them. There have also been issues with boys making suggestive comments to girls in short skirts.

I support the school enforcing school uniform policy but hate the fact that 12 year old DD and her friends are already being policed as to what they can or cannot wear because…men. DD hates the thick black tights she now has to wear. She always wore the correct length skirt and knee high socks.

The situation will apparently be reviewed ahead of the warmer months. I just feel this reinforces the view that girls & women need to ensure they dress in a way that doesn’t attract male attention but boys are not learning that inappropriate comments and behaviour towards a girl because of the way she dresses is completely unacceptable.

My daughter has the correct length skirt when she leaves our home.

It’s probably not making it out the front garden gate before being rolled up.

Why, because boys bullied her calling her Nun. She then felt self conscious and was trying to fit in.
reading what the op said boys are then passing judgement/comments on the skirts.

School introduced trousers as an option - out of roughly 120 girls in her year …1 wears them (due to changing pronouns)

Children especially teenage girls just want to blend in, be part of the wider tribe. It makes me sad to see my daughter getting in a pickle with fear of the bullies.

She doesn’t roll hers too short - she wouldn’t want her underwear on display. In the lower years as they sat on the floor in school hall she wore cycle shorts underneath.

She is a fairly resilient confident usually, except that damn school skirt. It’s also a rubbish design to try and stop the rolling ..all it means it’s designed for people with no hips, she has to go up two sizes to get the top to go over her hips - which bizarrely means the length increases.

This is so true.

This isn't about sexism or controlling women. Why are some people on here so keen to argue for their daughter's right to go to school with her privates on show? Is this what they really want?

If you want to talk about women's rights, how about the right to live in a society where young girls don't feel the need to walk around school with their privates on show. And not only at school, they are walking to the bus stop, through the town.

This isn't female empowerment - quite the opposite.

It's always been like that. Even when I was at school and I'm old.

Get together with other parents of girls and kick up a stink. We did this when DDs school insisted all girls wore trousers at all times. They did listen and retracted this rule.

The school seriously cannot expect girls to wear tights when it’s 25 degrees outside. They need to focus on the girls rolling up their skirts rather than punishing every girl in the school.

You've got to be kidding. Walking around in public with bum cheeks hanging out is a different thing entirely. Both the things you refer to are bad but in different ways it's like comparing apples with pears.

Do you not think that the rest of the pupils- boys and girls, and the staff- male and female- should be entitled to go to work/school and not see someone’s arse cheeks? Teenage girls are not responsible for the way boys and men treat them, but they are responsible for ensuring they are not flashing private areas of their body that other children and staff won’t want to be exposed to. Make or female.

How the hell do you do that when there is literally 500+ girls arriving with their arse on show? I'm not even kidding. I see more bare bum cheeks on the school run that I care to see thank you. I'm not 'looking', I can't help but see. The trend is short and the trend is gstrings, even for year 8's. That's what we're dealing with.

Ban skirts and put every kid in joggers and a hoody. Job done.

Love all those who think as parents you can “educate “ your teen dd into wearing a longer skirt when no one else in their year is! I gave up on the argument but bought Nike pro shorts and insisted they went under the skirts and told them that when they got detentions in the periodic crackdowns they would get no sympathy….

There was definitely that style too. In summer there was an open necked blouse with no tie option and that was often as skin tight as possible. But. All uniform had to come from
the school shop. We had fawn shirts and socks and a green worsted, can’t get that in the supermarket. And supermarkets possibly didn’t sell clothes then!

Then those girls should have to wear tights and not ruin it for everyone? I get the school having to address this - frankly if undergarments are on show they need to do something. If some girls ruin it for everyone especially after the school have addressed it what should they do? Tights for those with too short skirts - note home to parents about girls who break the uniform code. Simple.

Pretty much all the parents respond with
"Oh we pick our battles! She's just the same as the other girls".
It gets the school nowhere.

Couldn’t agree more. I think it also drives the acceptance of near nakedness out of school. In summer I see girls of 13/14/15 with thong bikinis, shorts up their bums. It’s horrible to see, there’s body positivity and then there’s just a lack of self awareness and respect.

I grew up with no uniform. We didn't have these issues.

Okay in winter it was like 0 to -5 so it wasn't an issue then. But we had 30 degree plus summers and didn't expose ourselves. More freedom in other areas can cut down in adapting uniforms.

And yeah, my kids wear uniforms. I see the pros and cons but preferred no uniform.

That’s as may be, but how can a parent prevent a child being put in detention during no the school day? Do the detentions at lunchtime.

“Listen to” is different to “follow the instructions of”.

Yeah, it's not easy though. You have 500 girls in tube skirts when all parents have been sent a letter about it and it's on your website?
Many parents obviously don't want to challenge what their daughters want to wear.

The boy is to blame for breaking the rules. He is not in control of the way the girl feels because of an item of clothing he has chosen to wear. But in general boys and men are not made to feel they need to adapt their clothing to make women feel comfortable. Women and girls are chastised for wearing clothes that show parts of their bodies. Men are not subjected to the same criticism. They are not told they are to blame if they are attacked because their shirt or trousers are too tight. They walk around without restrictions comfortable in the know that if they find something objectionable in the way a woman dresses, she can be shamed into changing.

Have you complained about the DH? He could be in deep trouble for that statement he made.

I would say if you are showing your underwear, sanitary items and bum to unconsenting members of the public/school you do contribute to making the space uncomfortable.

the issue isnt mini skirts. The issue is showing underwear and everything else.

that’s like saying a flasher isn’t in control
of how the public takes viewing his lack of clothing.

This is a strange thread. Some people seem to think its fine and dandy to wear skirts so short their arse cheeks are in full view. Shouldn't we be educating our daughters to make better choices of clothing rather than "they should be allowed to wear whatever they want"
These are CHILDREN FFS, and children need to have firm boundaries. It doesnt bode well for their future if they are not prepared to adhere to certain rules and behaviour.
There is really no point in swaggering around barely clothed and then complain that boys/men are looking at them. OF COURSE males will be looking at them, they cant exactly help it if a gaggle of schoolgirls are walking in front of them semi naked.
Just put some fucking clothes on !!

I've told my DD for 3 years not to roll her skirt.
It makes ZERO difference!

Yes it's weird. "I want my dd to be able to show her knickers at school. She should be able to dress how she likes. Stop looking etc"

Has any parent on here who says let them wear bum showing skirts answered the question I asked. Will you say it is ok for them to do the same when they have a job?

Who has said its fine for girls to wear skirts that show their bum?

People are just making stuff up.