How often do your grown up children call you?

[pinenuts75]

Just that mine never call really, unless I call them, or they want something then they will call, I appreciate they are young adults with their own lives but I just feel a bit abandoned I guess, is this normal?

Whatsapp messages almost daily Maybe a call off one once a week , the other could go a while ...

To be fair mostly everything is done online now.

My girls, often. My son, not so much. Then I bombard him with text messages until he caves.

We text quite a lot. Call if we have something we want an answer to quickly. Few times a week. Mostly quick enquiries.
Eldest likes to talk. So we have long rambling conversations when I have time.

Son is 22. Weekly phone call, message maybe once/twice in between. I would say I initiate it most of the time but he would notice and be upset if I didn’t, and I think if I stopped he would take over but it would be a bit more erratic.

Id just message them! I usually send cat pics or ask info for bits of admin.

Dd1 21 and at uni. We message multiple times a day without fail. She only phones me if there’s a problem and only phone her in kind of the same circumstance. We do video call between once a week and once a fortnight for about an hour and a half though.

dd2 may be less communicative when she goes. We shall see. She’s always been more independent. I’ll keep message and video calling her though whether she wants me to or not 😂.

OP, I moved abroad age 23 and was absolute rubbish at staying in contact with my parents in my 20s. I love them, we have a great relationship, but I sometimes let it go 3-4 months between phone calls. I would send a photo of whatever exotic destination I was travelling to, so they knew I was alive.

I started having DC age 30, and now we do a weekly Saturday morning call with the DC and my parents. I also call them several times during the week, often late night my time/early morning their time, for about 30 mins.

Having my own DC has made me appreciate them so much more, and I feel very guilty for effectively not speaking to them for 7 years. I’m moving back to my home town in 8 months, and I cannot express my excitement at living so close to them again and making the most of our time together.

In my experience, no call ever is odd.

I'm assuming they whatsapp/messenger you?

My son and daughter call me (separately!) when they're walking to the tube or to the shops or when something exciting has happened to them

Or when they need me to do something for them 😀

Otherwise we whatsapp a few times a day

I think kids don't use the phone like we used to. My son had to make a call to cancel a credit card and was utterly horrified that he couldn't do it online with a bot 🤣

One calls me 4 or 5 times a week just for a chat
with the other two I always joke that if I get a text from them it costs me about £30 if they call it costs me considerably more

I’m 36 and never call my mum, she calls me about twice a week. We text daily on our family WhatsApp and I see het every week.

Once a week . That's quite enough. I much prefer messaging

For a general chat - never. If they need something urgently, once or twice a year.

I also receive very few texts or other messages unless they are about things they want me to do for them, or unless I instigate a conversation about something.

I do occasionally get a photo of my youngest grandson sent to me, but that's about it. I don't think it is deliberate - I just think I'm not that important on a daily basis. And yes... It does hurt.

@DilemmaDelilah do you say anything to them? Gently explain how you feel?

It’s giving off I’m morally superior vibes. Hopefully the poster has lots of good friends she sees in real life otherwise social isolation looms.

Oh I thought you were an adult child talking about how your mum interacts with you as first two paragraphs are exactly how my mum is with me!

@Miranda65 why does this make you proud? Proud that you don't know how to do something which is very easy? That seems a weird take 🤡

My DD are aged 34 and 28. I rarely talk to them on the phone. DD1 maybe once a month and DD2 only if we have complicated arrangements to make. We do chat very regularly on WhatsApp on various groups depending on what we are discussing. We all prefer this as we can answer in our own time. They are both very busy with work and other stuff and I am not keen on chatting on the phone. This suits us all.

Daily. Minimum once , probably more and messages about daily life 🙄😁

I'm 50, DD is 21, third year at uni and messages pretty much every day, phones or video calls two or three times a week for anything between 20-90 minutes. If she's particularly busy it'll tail off a bit and I wouldn't expect her to be in touch that often. We just get on really well and there's a crossover in our interests (I'm also studying part-time for a degree) and work so we have plenty to talk about.

My mum is 86. I speak to her every other day (sometimes more) and visit a couple of times a week.

Yes they when they want something or advice whatever, but not just in general.

Proud? Have you made up some weird competitive anti video call game in your head?, because nobody cares whether the next person makes a video call or not.

Once a week - more often if she's worried about something- usually a couple of whatsapp's as well

Daughter of (now gone) parents.
Pre DD - might message once or twice a week and would go see them probably for an hour or two Saturday. But this could go weeks without at times. Rang only to clarify stuff if the messages were getting confusing.
Mat leave - photos on WhatsApp odd message here and there might see them three ISH times a week. Phone calls to clarify stuff.
When working - message most days at some point not necessarily a backwards and forwards but something if I couldn't think of anything to say that day it would just be a message or something my DD had done.
But I knew they were there and they knew I was. So don't be disheartened they might come back to you x

Once every couple of weeks. We text too.
I am happy with that.