Very advanced children

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I just happen to have landed on a bunch of threads by parents with 'gifted' children, and one or two about parents who think their kids are more gifted than they are.

It's reminded me of an 18-month-old I once met, who talked more eloquently than most 7-year-olds can. He had a very enquiring mind, asking intelligent questions (I was at work) and telling me about stuff he'd learned. He could read and was good at arithmetic. He was a little charmer, really, a delight to meet - if somewhat wearing; he never stopped asking questions.

He evidently had the mind of a toddler despite his advanced skills. He was quite physically developed, though still within range for his age. His mother told me her biggest worry was that people couldn't help treating him as if he were older, expecting him to be more responsible or experienced than he was able.

One of my nephews suffered from this as a young child, too - nothing like the prodigy I've just described, but he was verbally advanced due to spending nearly all his time with adults and was also big and strong for his age. Kids shouldn't have to keep telling adults "I'm only three, I can't do that!" but he did have to.

I sometimes wonder how Prodigy Child turned out. His mum said she was prepared for his development to slow down until others caught up, but lifetime prodigies do exist and I don't think they always have an easy time.

Have you known any DC like this? What happened to them? Alternatively, feel free to share about the deluded parents of normal children you have known!

So are you researching for your work?

in my experience, a lot of children seem to peak in primary school and then disappear into the average in secondary school.Most of the top set kids from my oldest son’s primary are now firmly somewhere in the middle.
That doesn’t mean they shouldn’t have been in top set in primary school, it just means that all kids develop differently and parents shouldn’t put too much emphasis on sets - they are for teaching purposes, nothing else.
Others are average or even slightly behind early on , and then just keep getting stronger.Very few of the remarkable scientists i work with (not me) were anything but ordinary in early life in their memory, but all had supportive parents and were always curious.

Ha, no. It's just as I said - threads I landed on reminded me of that little boy.

At primary school, (long ago),the boy who was top of the class by a mile was also a year younger than the rest of us. When we moved to secondary school, he had to stay in primary school an extra year. I believe very advanced children like that are easily damaged and need careful handling or they won’t achieve their full potential.
My own daughter was identified as gifted and talented and there was a halfhearted attempt to run a few special sessions for them in years 5 and 6. She soon lost faith, observing ‘the problem is that the people running the sessions aren’t gifted or talented’.

There was a thing in the 70s where some children were taught to read before they were 2. It was just a specific technique rather than that the child was a genius. Can't remember what it was called...it did involve word labels being stuck on everything including the dog apparently. I could therefore read before I was two. Everyone always thinks I must have been a prodigy and where did it all go wrong!

I was identified as gifted and talented in the mid- to late-1990s, in the wake of the Dearing review (1993) I was registered as having special educational needs and included in local programmes such as a summer school to meet other "G&Ters". School also really wanted to move me up a year but my mum bless her said no.

By the time I did my GCSEs in 2005 I was a good academic all-rounder, came away with 11 A*s and As as they were then. However I honestly believe that 50% of my "gift" was a good memory and ability to prioritise tasks, 30% a good use of vocabulary and persuasion, and the other 20% is a kind-of upright, extrovert pseudo-confidence that allows me to bullshit...

I am bright and engaging but extremely ordinary now, work part-time in a job that fits with my family (£30k fte), and talk mostly about minutiae like what's on at the cinema and who said what to who Brooklyn Beckham

I do struggle with my self-worth as I was destined for "great things" (never applied for Oxbridge but had a place at Durham, didn't want to go and did nursing at the local poly instead) which never quite came off. My perceived intelligence was so central to my identity in my teens and sometimes I feel like a complete failure. I went back to my old school for an open day with my own tween a couple of years ago and saw some of my old teachers, they all recognised me and I felt really embarrassed talking about how my life turned out. I wish I'd never been told I was special tbh 🤣

I do think it is different if someone is an actual prodigy in something arty or sporty or sciencey though.

I had one who was very precocious as a pre-schooler. Now a teen and does continue to excel quite significantly but not in a prodigy sort of way, he's a normal kid at a normal school with normal mates. But it was obvious when he was a toddler that he was extremely academic and he's lived up to that.

My DM tells me that my cousin could speak in full sentences and hold a conversation at 9 months. She’s in her 50s now and is as thick as 3 day old porridge. She’s a lovely woman, but it’s quite funny to think that she was once pegged as a child prodigy.

An 18 month old that could read and chat eloquently? 😂

“However I honestly believe that 50% of my "gift" was a good memory and ability to prioritise tasks, 30% a good use of vocabulary and persuasion, and the other 20% is a kind-of upright, extrovert pseudo-confidence that allows me to bullshit...”

ha! That is the best description of me I have ever seen! Yes! I think I have done OK but I could do more I guess but I’m realising now is the effort worth it?

My kid is year 5 and doing ks3 science & maths. Currently learning quantum physics & year eight algebra.
However he does have autism and thinks very literally which gives him the ability to do that.
Some kids are ahead, doesn’t make the parent deluded.

Mine could do this at 12 months. I'm sure 9 months was still single words though. Very early with all things. Did a PhD then decided to follow their heart and become a nanny. Good on them for doing what makes them happy.

My brother was like this as a child. Extremely academically advanced in almost astonishing ways; educational theorists were studying him for a while. He has a doctorate in aerospace engineering now and leads a major American think tank on thr subject.

He was a deeply isolated and awkward young boy and never really grew out of it. Interestingly, both of his children are diagnosed with autism, which makes me wonder if he may also be ND, though when we were growing up diagnosis was far less common.

Bright and gifted children need nurturing, which is why grammar/comprehensives and private schools shouldn't be stamped on like they are. It's just smarmy and envious to destroy a decent education for these children.

Me too!!!!

This is very interesting. My husband was apparently like this as a young child, confirmed by all the family. He was one of those who was in the gifted and talented set throughout school. After college and university he was contacted by a company to work for them, he traveled allover the world teaching his skills (software engineer) and then was fought for by 2 companies to work for them. He is extremely clever in his field and can memorise codes and numbers as long as what fits on his 3 screens. He is absolutely neurodivergent. He knows he is extremely clever in his field but lacks common sense (sorry love). He is now top of his game for software engineering and has been offered jobs allover the word. But don’t tell him I was this nice about him it might boost his ego too much 🤣🤣🤣

I certainly wouldn’t class my child as “advanced” but he definitely met some of the first ‘big milestones’ quite early. He was confidently walking at 10months and by the age of 2 he could have proper conversations with adults who didn’t know him - his speech was always very clear and easy to understand. He’s also in the top centiles for height and weight so looks older than he is.

“I’m only 4” seems to be his catchphrase at the moment. People expect a lot of him because he looks older. I also get comments most days about why he’s not at school as if I just never send him. He’s not started school yet 🫠 And at certain play places where they have age restrictions eg, an under 5s area - I usually get reminded that “older children shouldn’t be in there” and then have to explain that he is actually only 4.

I do know someone like this - a proper ‘what happens if I put this fork in a socket’ kind of 6 year old prodigy (he shorted half the street and nearly killed himself). His whole childhood is littered with stories of ‘experimentation’ like that. He got a scholarship to a top boarding school which he hated, aced his A levels at 16, and had to go to work for a year because university wouldn’t accept him until he was 17 (the year of his 18th birthday).

He went on to be a very successful producer who travels the world and works with an array of top artists. He’s perfectly lovely and it’s always a real treat to spend time with him as he’s a great raconteur and conversationalist - he’s excited by and interested in everything - like a magpie for information. He has some nerdy hobbies - likes building complicated musical instruments from scratch, programming for fun, etc. but they add to his charm. His wife is very similar and they dote on each other - as happy as clams.

All children need nurturing, and all children deserve a decent education, not just those who can afford it.

Someone I follow on instagram had / has a child like this (a sort of Z list celeb, ex big brother winner,)

Her DD is now nearly five and clearly very bright and alert. I used to fret as my own ds (similar age, that’s why I started following her) was nothing like her but it is levelling out, as much as I can see anyway.

I was talking with my husband last night about treating our son (now 5 and likely ASD/ADHD) like he was older when he was a toddler because of his advanced speech. I feel really guilty about it because looking back at photos it’s obvious how much of a baby he still was.

He’s not a genius just a bit ahead (Yr2 level versus Reception). Our second child is now twenty months and (though she’s smart) she doesn’t have precocious speech like her brother which really brings home the differences in how I’ve treated them.

I would imagine he is neurodivergent. Most who excell like that are. Lovely to hear about your brothet my 10 year old son is very similar and despite him having autism, gives me some hope he will be successful in his adulthood!

I just don't believe an 18 month old did all that.

Walking and body size have zero to do with intelligence.