Jealousy over diagnosis - thinking of staying off social media

[Silverwhining]

I shared a personal experience about a serious health issue and misdiagnoses on a Facebook group from where I used to live. Many people had wondered why I disappeared for 10 years, and the condition was part of the reason I moved away quietly. Most responses were kind, but one long comment accused me of lying and seeking attention. Some people didn’t even think it was actually me, though others verified it by asking questions only I could answer. The comment was entirely driven by jealousy and ultimately led to my post being removed and me being banned from posting.

To be fair, years ago some people pretended to be me online as a joke, but this was very different. Some people who know me say the Internet is savage and they would not say things like that face to face. This has really affected me and I feel it might be better for my mental health to avoid social media completely.

But why on earth did you go on a FB group from somewhere you've not lived in ten years and recount a personal experience out of the blue, particularly given that you had someone pretending to be you in the past??? I mean, what could possibly be your motivation for telling something relating to your own medical diagnosis on a neighbourhood SM group where you are presumably not in touch with any of the people on it?

I don't understand. Are you a local celebrity? Sorry to be blunt but why would people care?

I posted because I have only recently been able to really think about what happened to me. 10 years is just how long it’s taken me to process it and I got a feeling that it was important for to me to say something.
I suppose I didn’t need to post in the first place at all and will consider that an option in the future.

Why would people be jealous of a diagnosis?

Her children have been on a waiting list for a diagnosis all their lives, and I was able to get one privately. She was frustrated that her children hadn’t received the same validation or support, so she projected that onto me.

I don’t understand how you are linking this to jealousy? It’s quite a reach.

No one wants to hear about that. Local facebook groups are for locating missing cats and getting rid of old sofas. You probably came across as unhinged. Do people even care what someone from 10 years ago who they don’t even know is doing? Was the diagnosis a mental health issue by chance? Are you struggling now and looking for support? If so, there are better places to look for support than your local facebook group from a house 10 years ago.

This is why social media is not the place to share personal information.

They wrote a long post about how hard it is to get a diagnosis and therefore I must be lying and have another agenda
She was also worried that me taking action might result in it being harder for her own children to get a diagnosis for the condition.

Yeesh. I’d either delete or block. You were after a certain reaction and didn’t get it. That may be the case here aswell!

Who is this person?

What do you mean by that

I find your motivation in doing that unfathomable but agree that staying off social media is wise. Hopefully you have people who care for you and know you in real life you can discuss your health with. Seeking validation from strangers is never going to give you what you want.

Social media is so dangerous and fake. Avoid .

You sound like a colossal attention seeker.

I dont understand any of this.

Its been 10 years you have all moved on.
Or did you just pop back up to brag you have a diagnosis.
Did you move away because you kept pissing folk off.

It all sounds a bit bizarre. It’s been a decade, surely anyone interested in you and your health would be in touch with you via other avenues, so it’s unlikely anyone in that group is going to be interested. It just seems like an odd interaction all round so I’d just move on from it and pick your platforms for sharing stuff more carefully from now on.

Seeking attention, you say? A wild accusation indeed.

I don't understand why this person would think you getting a diagnosis would affect her children.

You made a mistake posting this on social media but I would ask for your post on Facebook to be deleted and don't give it any more thought.

I was completely uncontactable

That is a bit of a strange thing to do OP. Social media is about social stuff, not sharing your personal information. I doubt 10 years on many people really wondered why you disappeared so the post was unnecessary.

You don’t need to stay off social media - just think whether a group is the right place for a post.

I am not on any social media.
It is too fake for me and too many people become addicted to it.

I am a bit confused about why you would create a public post on a group like that.

Gently, why do you think people would care?

I would reach out to friends and explain why you disappeared but I wouldn’t have said it to the entire town/village.

What was you hoping would be the outcome?

Some people are just nasty and definitely say things they wouldn’t be brave enough to say to your face but you can also stand up for yourself or ignore them too.
Don’t let them drag you into an argument nor let them push you off social media if you want to be on there.

Yet another reason not to post stuff on socials about your personal life. You never know where it's going to end up and nowhere is 100% safe except in your head.

I think sometimes you see something on social media or mumsnet and can kind of call how it’s going to play out.

Ask what you hoped to get out of posting and if you felt you got it.