Things that sound nice but actually aren't

[WeeAgnes]

I'm putting forward Fruit teas.
Some of the combinations sound so promising and positively delicious.

In reality, they taste what I imagine drinking pot pourri to be like.

Pets. I like animals but they are generally minging and needy if you take responsibility for one. No thanks. Best to leave them in the wild.

Really hot sunny weather. I feel so great about the idea but then always have to retreat indoors.

Sushi! I'm not fussy at all where food us concerned but I've never liked this

That really made me laugh 🤣 I find dolphins elusive little bastards at the best of times and have never seen one on any organised ‘dolphin watching’ expedition 🤦🏻‍♀️🤣

In Majorca this year we went on a boat trip and stopped in a bay for swimming. I thought it would be lovely. Turns out the middle of the med is bloody cold in April and for some reason I thought I was never going to surface and would drown so I clung on to the side of the boat like a barnacle while my husband and three year old started down at me, a mixture of disappointment and perplexity in their eyes, since I’d made such a big show of diving off in the first place. I think it was the shock of the cold water 😳🤣

Also, most cheesecakes. I crave a good cheesecake. It doesn't exist!

they are mostly sugary imposters

a baked cheese cake uses curd cheese and isn't sweet

Broad Beans. So shiny and lovely looking. But absolutely vile.

International travel for work. Sounds glamerous. The reality is lots of time in airports and taxis and feeling tired / not sure what time zone you're in. Plus the obligation to socialise with clients when you'd rather be in bed.

Cinnamon buns.... None quite ever live up to what I expected. I mean they're nice and everything...but not amazing.

Broad beans are delicious. Runner beans though - home grown ones are wonderful, supermarket ones a big disappointment.

Spa days. I also find it hard to relax. And then when I’m just about relaxed I have to go home. I should so spa day with hotel night before and after as it takes me that long to unclench

They are. As are those giant cupcakes and cookies that are everywhere.

Occasionally taste a really good homebaked one and think THIS is how they should taste. Stinkng imposters!

I say every year I don't want a birthday cake. They just disappoint. Every year this is ignored and a disappointing cake sits in the kitchen for a week.

An ‘everything shower’. Always mentioned as a form of self-care and relaxation. Nothing more exhausting to me!

Hard agree with travelling for work.

Expectation: Great! They are flying me out to an exotic and interesting cultural destination and paying for a 5-star hotel.

Reality: 5 days of compulsory breakfast, lunch and dinner with colleagues you hardly know, trapped in an over air-conditioned hotel seminar.

No chance to look around the place properly or even relax on your own in your swish hotel room before it's time get back on the plane.

Can I add alcohol-free mulled wine? It’s always so unbearably sweet it sets my teeth on edge.

So true!

Fruit teas, agreed
Popcorn - freshly popped, buttery… I’ll eat a barrel full and be annoyed as I feel I’ve eaten nothing, it’s a SCAM of a food
Bottomless brunches - totally biased as I don’t really drink and would never go for G&Ts or Prosecco anyway, but I want bottomless food not just booze. Secretly fuming each time certain friends excitedly suggest going for one, because even if I’m honest and say it just isn’t worth it for me, it still comes off as I’m no fun. Which I’m not, tbf, but that’s for many reasons and Canva-menu, neon-lit, rose-gold, marble-topped bottomless brunches making silly money off women isn’t one of them.
Baths - my face is hot and sweaty, it’s boring, and I can’t wash my hair properly

Yes. I have a friend who travels to India and America for work and he's barely there a few days and most of that is spent in a hotel room or with the team at work. It sounds crap.

Im disappointed in most shop bought or restaurant cheesecakes but home made is usually yummy!

Fucking Camping!WTAF
Lets buy miniature (and shit) versions of all the things we need at home, put them in a small dome shape material house and spend an hour stressing over getting it in the car, drive to a field somewhere, spend an hour stressing over putting it up, live in it for a few days, get all damp and uncomfortable (while trying to keep it clean and tidy (which is fucking impossible!)and then stress about packing it all up again. NOT FUN AT ALL!!

Staying in an Air BnB with young kids because it’ll be easier than a hotel.

its not. You can’t check in until 4 pm. And then you spend the last morning from eight till 10 am check out cleaning the whole kitchen emptying all of the food and getting everything into the back of the car, trying to check nothing‘s been broken, stripping the bed rearranging the bathroom and emptying all of that, and pretty much binning half of the food you brought because it now won’t fit in the car but you haven’t got round to eating it.

And there’s always a load of ornaments all over that you have to run round and grab before your child smashes. We’ve decided we’re just gonna get hotel suites in future. Same price tbh.

Don't become a vegetarian. It's on every sodding menu.

I agree with the comment about most shop bought / cafe cakes .
They look wonderful with frosting on top and some edible decoration , but they are just often a lump of over sweet and tasteless goo .

Give me a homemade Victoria sandwich , or Lemon drizzle or good old fashioned fruit cake and I'm happy .

Ikwym about fruit teas. The only way they start to taste of the thing they smell of is if you literally don't ever drink any other liquids except water. Then the flavour starts to come through.
If you drink anything with sugar or a strong taste it does just not have an impact at all.

For me the worst thing I can think of is macaroni cheese. Any really. But the ones that Americans seem to eat out of a box with this gooey plastic they add to it? Or from a tin. Even really fancy pasta with a well made cheese sauce is just awful to me.

Loads of people seem to love it and they tried to make it some kind of street food trend a few years back. But just no.

@Hoppinggreen
@therewasafishinthepercolator

Agree re Cake.

The only cake I'll entertain is a Black Forest Gateau or a Pavlova.
Any mass produced shop bought cake is a massive let down. Just way too sweet!

Parkrun (sold as you can also walk it!). I walk the dogs and watch them every Saturday and the sight of 200 people looking so miserable they surely wish they were dead is quite enough to make sure I never take part.