In trouble at work- over a quiche

[Coffeandtoast]

Good morning

So on Friday we had a little gathering in the office at work. We all agreed to take in various food items and my contribution was quiches and sausage rolls.

so I took four quiches. At the end of the gathering there was one whole quiche left unopened.we agreed that we’d just share out the untouched food

I said that I’d just take the unopened quiche as we would eat it at home. In then comes Patricia, an older woman who I generally find quite difficult to work with. She’s self opinionated and knows everything. I generally try hard to get on with her but she’s a massive PITA. So she said something along the lines of “ you can’t just take the quiche until we’ve discussed who’s taking what” . I explained that I wasn’t to fussed about any of it and that she could just take the quiche, she carried on with her chuntering and huffing and puffing at me. So this is where it went pear shaped, I just snapped and shouted- “ just take the cunting quiche, Patricia”

it’s all kicked off and I have a HR meeting tomorrow regarding my foul language!!!!

No just crustless I think!

TBH cunting is not a word used very often unlike fucking so I’m presuming you use that term regularly. Coming from a woman that’s disgraceful IMO. Do damage limitation and apologise to her

Why is it more disgraceful coming from a woman - the OP hasn't actually said what gender they are if I'm not mistaken

So it's less bad if a man says cunt or cunting? Why so?

Gender stereotypes?

Quichegate:

I was there waiting to be ate.
Still in the box, it was getting late.
Time had come to be taken away.
But Patricia wanted all to share,
Huffing and puffing, quite a state.
Coffee and toast took the bait.

“Take the cunting quiche, Patricia”.

Coffee and Toast took me away.
and Patricia will live for another day.
But we are all are wondering what HR will say.

Just take the cunting quiche Patricia" could be a Mumsnet classic line.

My thought too, @BishyBarnyBee.

Can't add pic

We don’t know it is Patricia who room this to HR, it could have been anyone.

What has being a woman got to do with anything?

There is something wrong with that - it’s petty!

No one expected to go home with anything, so just grab whatever and go. And either eat it or don’t. It’s not like this was food that was relied upon for dinner.

How was the HR meeting?
If there were no other witnesses, remember, it’s your word against Patricia’s

Because they can’t control themself in the workplace.

When I first read the post I thought there was a miscommunication. Patricia didn’t know that op had brought the quiches so when Op did what I believe anyone would do, which is to take back her uneaten quiche, Pat thought Op was being selfish and tried to put forward a fairer way of sharing the leftovers. None of them was in the wrong at this point, although Pat would have seemed annoying. Op swearing at Pat was wrong in my mind. Someone “boiling your piss (charming) is not an excuse for swearing at them at work. It would have felt humiliating and abusive (there is no way that could be said in a “kind” way.

it’s not that it's less serious. It is that it has deeply misogynist connotations. You don’t expect a woman to exhibit that level of hate against another woman. I agree that it is an unusual phrase. I have to admit that I initially assumed Op was male (and I agree that is gender stereotyping). I have never had a woman say something like that to me. They have sworn at me but never like that. I don’t think a woman has ever called me a cunt. No man either. And yes I know that op didn’t call Pat a cunt but the intimation is there.

I never thought of that. you’re right.

It used to be the case in teaching profession. Perhaps not these days?

Totally agree that people shouldn’t swear at other people at work. Although op did make me laugh and I can see how it’s easily done with the certain types of people who are routinely annoying!

Right - so you object to the word cunt but you don't mind calling someone unhinged

Im sorry - anyone raising a formal grievance over being told to take a "cunting quiche" is a complete time waster

Tbf being assaulted by the cunting quiche would have been worse...
That be a lot of mess to clean up.
Hopefully P is out of therapy in time for Christmas..
Poor lamb.

I smell BS (it may be the quiche that's gone off) but I have worked with this person, or her doppelganger!

There is a difference in the way we use language in the workplace and on an anonymous Forum.

And it wasn't me who called them unhinged by the way.

My mum was a teacher all her working life - some head teachers did a lot more to staff than call them cunting and didn't even get a disciplinary. Maybe in the days where people had little employment rights - but you could say that for any profession.

Also depends on things like length of service and whether people can take an ex employer to tribunal even if they are sacked without notice

Tell them the woman is a menace always poking her nose into other peoples business and generally trying to get people into trouble and you were just taking home one thing that you’d actually paid for as it wasn’t opened and she came along and started shouting at you and cursing and you lost your cool because you are fed up with her behaviour towards you.

Lie, you mean? The only one shouting and cursing was the OP.