Dressed up but bare feet?

[Flowerslamp]

When we visit BF's parents. I've met them a handful of times they're definitely BF's parents, not ILs iyswim. If it makes a difference, I'm middleaged, they're 70s.

On the odd occasion that I've been to their house, I've taken the lead from BF and gone reasonably smartly dressed, in the same way as we would have gone "visiting" when I was a child.

The difference is no one from my childhood had a shoes off home.

I made the right choice re what to wear, his mother was beautifully turned out, as she always is. She was wearing gold block heel shoes with her outfit, which (possibly) are only worn indoors.

BF removed his shoes at the door, so I did the same. Mother didn't say don't worry about it, as I would, so I assume shoes off are a requirement. Father was wearing smart leather slippers.

This left BF in his socks and me in tights, feeling partially dressed. Should I have taken slippers co ordinate with my outfit ?! Or is there another way.

Fwiw, they were perfectly lovely and we have a fun afternoon. It's not the biggest deal in the world, I'm just wondering what to wear on Boxing Day.

As an aside they have under floor heating, which is lovely at forst but by the end of the day I felt horribly overheated, you can't move away from it as you might a radiator and without shoes you have this direct heat on your feet all day!

Safety boots are de rigeur in my house.

Not totally convinced it’s a class thing. I went to a very posh prep school and as five year olds we had to change into indoor shoes when we came in from the playground so we didn’t scuff the parquet floors.

This is one of those things which I find fascinating-

IRL I have never ever been to a "shoes off" house.

I never knew they existed before mumsnet-except for that Sex and the City episode where carrie had her shoes stolen.

The very idea makes me very uncomfortable-I am clearly in a minority on this thread but I find the whole idea very precious and cringe.
I guess it's the same way you shoes off ppl would feel about me in my "gasp" outdoor shoes indoors.

The zebra print is fab, isn't it? They're not obviously not super cozy like a slipper boot, but they are made of soft warm material and the soles are rubber so your feet are well insulated against cold floors. Sizing is pretty true and they suit medium to wide feet (so may slip off on narrow feet, but I think they do a version with a strap too)

i think it possibly is a class thing. but also lifestyle. If you live in an old rural home with flagstone floors you don’t want to be barefoot on those. I imagine if you live in a home with carpets and the sort of furniture designed to loaf about on then you’re more likely to take your shoes off.

The question is though, what you require of visitors. That definitely is a class thing.

I’m two years in Ireland now and I think it’s really odd that nobody takes off their shoes indoors!! Why would you want your outdoor shoes on, bringing grime and dirt in and spreading it around the kitchen floor?

I have also noticed though that carpets are not at all popular here. Everyone loves tiled floors, so maybe it’s because it’s easier to keep the floor clean so shoes don’t matter?

In our house my PILs will not take off their shoes ever, even though they know we would prefer it and we have tiny kids who play on the floor, roll on the floor, drop and pick up snacks from the floor…
They come often enough that DH has suggested they just leave a pair of indoor shoes/slippers here and they just said no.

I don’t ask less frequent visitors to take them off but they often do when they see that we don’t wear them indoors.

The class thing...
I've been in wealthy households where old wooden floors and rugs are the mainstream. There's usually endless dogs named after greek gods, cats named after Shakespearian characters, and horse paraphernalia drying in the kitchen near an aga.

I think less wealthy households keep their houses and children cleaner, so no shoes.

I take slippers or dress up with something including socks not tights

This is partly why I think it’s rude to make guests take their shoes off. It just feels plain weird sitting round someone else’s house in stockinged feet, I don’t know why anyone would want to make their guests feel that way just so their carpets stay cleaner.

I also can’t believe this is such a thing. I’ve never been in a shoes-on house. Everyone I know is shoes-off. We’re all working or lower middle class in Essex, maybe it’s a class/region thing? Some of the comments calling it precious are funny to me, so is the idea of worrying about how it makes an outfit look or debating germ levels with/without shoes. How different we all are

It's aspirational among some - the idea that taking your shoes off is "posh".

If you have a doormat then there'll be no muddy or wet feet anywhere. It's an affectation and I think it's rude.

It's not aspirational and it's not an affectation. It's totally normal in many cultures.

https://flabelus.com

Thank me later.
These are amazing

What about getting a pair of these as your “indoor” shoes? They are pretty and soft.
https://www.fitflop.com/uk/en/shop/delicato-crystal-buckle-metallic-leather-mary-janes-p-E3J#011

We are a shoes-off house. Just take a little pair of slippers.

In the circles in which I move it’s the opposite. People-made-good (like me) like their houses clean and so have a shoes-off approach. My REALLY posh friends live in huge, old houses with draughty floorboards, cold flagstones, threadbare rugs, dogs and dog beds everywhere. No one takes their shoes off.

I never know what to put on my feet, so being asked to remove my shoes at the door can be relief. I am the one in a pretty dress and ancient trainers - because they are comfy.

As I don’t live on a farm and I trust grown ups to wipe their feet - I wouldn’t dream of asking for shies off downstairs.

We have bunch of ikea fabric slippers by the door for guests and they get washed with sanitiser and hot water. Different colours and sizes. I don't think they sell them actually anymore. Need to find alternative because size 10 is gone.
We are shoes off. Both from shoes off countries.

I don't under how this is a class thing. Tbh I don't under how lots of things here are class thing😂

DON’T YOU DARE WEAR YOUR FILTHY CLODHOPPERS IN MY HOUSE!

Take some lovely embroidery velvet slippers
. Like these laura Ashley ones .. only £14 at next.. plenty of colours to choose from.
Like a Mary Jane shoe but a slipper.
I have them.. the Green ones.
https://www.next.co.uk/style/su673355/f80717?gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=22747670873&gclid=Cj0KCQiAxonKBhC1ARIsAIHq_luW2A6ogfnsk4hEuTlXcSYMFQIla9BGd_bHjOyVUEpX-2Us6L5IAGcaAmOLEALw_wcB

It’s not that deep.

To me, it’s just healthier, comfier and keeps the carpet cleaner being barefoot. Win-win-win, surely.

I have a lovely pair of ballet flats that I only wear indoors. The weather is so horrible at the moment that I wouldn't insult my hosts by walking into their house with wet and muddy shoes. I took my ballet flats with me to wear when I went to dinner at a friends house last week.