Would you send your baby to nursery if you were a stay at home mum ?

[Senseibility]

If you were a stay at home mum and could afford to happily send your baby to nursery one or two days a week would you? I do because we can afford to im chronically ill my husband is self employed working long unpredictable hours and we have no family help unless it was an emergency as they work. I just feel guilty about sending him even though he loves it. It’s helped cure my PPD and my home life is so much better because of it. I just feel like a bad mum and I desperately wanted to be a stay at home mum

I wouldn't unless I had no other option. I would use a nanny or a babysitter though. I think it's good for you and the baby to have a break from each other.

If he loves nursery and is happy there then no harm done. Being a SAHM doesn't mean spending 24/7 with your child. Everyone needs a break. And everyone has always had a break as well, even in the cave the other women would have helped care for the young. No-one was expected to be attached to their baby 24/7. Enjoy the break. Don't feel guilty.

No I wouldn't.

But in your situation I would.

I wasn’t really comfortable using nursery until my child was potty trained and verbal. I can see circumstances where I might make other choices though.

No, but I would in your case as you have a chronic illness

No I wouldn't, not until they were three, because I would be a stay at home mum to care for my baby myself. But it's don't have a chronic illness, everyone's circumstances are different

Yeah, dd went as soon as I got the free 15 hours x

Mine went 2 days a week from 18months and I only worked 1 night shift , which often didn’t fit in with their days , I felt it was good for them to socialise and I wasn’t a toddler group type of person .

No

I dint think being a sahm means you have to do everything yourself all the time.

People might prefer nannies, or childminders or au pairs or other family members to help instead of nursery. But nurseries are fine.

I would. It’s good for both of you, you get some respite and your baby is socialising, nursery attendance makes most children settle into pre-school and reception better. Don’t feel guilty, it’s what you need.

Yes, definitely. It is important for children to socialise. Even more important for you to look after yourself so you can look after them!

Surprised by all the ‘no’s! I definitely would want the break.

I was vastly wealthy enough that the cost was literally zero consideration then I would do- in part for socialisation. But I wouldn’t if it was in any way eating into family expenses

Yes I would use the day to be productive and get a head start on the week, food shop or have time for yourself.

I wasn’t a stay at home mum but used childcare for my eldest when on maternity leave with younger dc.

I did and still do use childcare on my days off as I’m p/t. Don’t see the issue with it but I waited until they were 12 months, I did have family who could help though before that.

Yes, I would. You need a break sometimes. Others might have grandparents who take the child the odd afternoon, but where this is not an option I find it absolutely reasonable to use childcare.

i preferred a childminder to nursery though.

I did. I had 2 disabled children under the age of 3. Ds1 has autism and he couldn't cope with the stream of physios, OT's social workers etc coming to our house to see ds2. So ds1 went to nursery 2 days a week and I did appointments one day and took ds2 to a special needs baby group on the other day.

As you are ill then it makes sense for you to have a break and use childcare
If you weren't ill then I wouldn't see the point.
Nursery before the age of 3 is childcare. If a parent is a SAHM they don't need childcare.
But your circumstances are different so it's perfectly fine for you to send your child 💐

When they were toilet trained, they benefitted from mixing with other children and the other adults. Started 1 or 2 days per week and then increased.
A few DC in our village met at nursery and were in classes together for A levels.

Yes absolutely

It's not the only kind of break some of us get/got though.

I was a SAHM to all 3 of mine and if I wanted a break, my DH worked shifts and would look after them, or my mum and MIL would give me a break.

So I didn't feel the need for nursery.

I didn't send any of mine to nursery until they was old enough to go to the local school nursery.
My youngest won't go to nursery until next year.
Even if I wasnt able to stay home they still would not have gone to nursery until 3.

I wouldn’t have. No. But then I’m not chronically ill and so have never been in your position. You need to do what you need to do.

How old is the baby OP?