I wish I hadn’t read this thread just for pure ignorance like this.
My best friend has a physical disability and is currently on her 5th holiday in 12 months. She has friends and family and drives an adaptive car from her PIP. Her kids all get benefits from physical disabilities and she has a large house and disposable income. She gets extra help as her ex husband pays a huge amount of child maintenance.
My friend has never worked but has a busy happy fulfilled life with lots of support.
I would rather have the physical restrictions my friend has and would swap with her in a second. She has regular trips away as well as holidays, has massages and beauty treatments and days out, she has pain but it’s easier to control physical pain sometimes than mental pain.
My friend has admitted she has a much easier and happier life than me.
I have mental health problems but worked until I no longer could and worked from 14 until almost 40, I used to work 50-60 hours a week and have contributed into the tax system.
I have no family at all, my parents died young and I struggle to leave the house from anxiety. I don’t just mean I feel a bit uncomfortable or a bit anxious, I feel like I’m being buried alive or suffocating and am so flooded with adrenaline I feel paralysed. I have been a victim of sexual abuse and assault and I’m terrified when a man comes too close to me which can’t always be avoided.
I had a good day earlier this year where I made a short bus journey alone and this was a huge celebrated event from my mental health support workers. I didn’t celebrate, I wondered how I’d got to a place in life where such an insignificant thing to most people became something to be celebrated for me.
Every day I wake up and I wish I hadn’t, I’ve attempted suicide multiple times and now I’m just scared of another attempt going wrong and being in a worse position with lasting damage. I have panic attacks and spend a lot of days where I can’t stop crying and I’m very bitter and angry about life. I have bipolar where my mania can lead to unsafe situations and I lose complete touch with reality. My employers could no longer support me and other staff found me too difficult to work with.
I have addiction issues as sometimes drugs and alcohol were the only things to get me through life. I have eating disorders and am generally just a mess, I hope that I’ll get cancer soon and die like my parents from my lifestyle as it would take the decision away from me.
My best friend once said she thought it would be a blessing for me if I died as my life is so difficult.
I have been trying for 8 years to learn to drive but due to dyspraxia and anxiety it’s just another thing I have failed and makes my world even smaller.
My partner has just left me for a much younger woman after being my only support for the last 13 years and I did everything for him. I thought we were happy and he was the one person I felt safe with and could leave the house with but he suddenly decided he wanted children and I knew I could never have a child and risk them having the same mental and physical health problems.
I also have arthritis and gynaecological issues and am going to have to have a hysterectomy soon which I struggle to come to terms with. I have other physical problems as well but I could work if it wasn’t for my mental health.
I take medication, go to therapy, see my psychiatrist and engage with all services I’m offered. I’d give anything to return to work and have a purpose, feel less of a burden and spend time in the outside world instead of trapped inside day after day alone.
There are plenty of people in a similar situation to me. PIP isn’t an easy benefit to claim and it was suggested to me to attempt to claim multiple times over the years but I refused as I wanted to support myself. When I was awarded the biggest thing to me wasn’t about the money but the acknowledgement that I was struggling so much and that my mental health issues were taken seriously. Up until then I’d fallen into the common mindset that only physical problems counted.
I am not rolling in money, I get hardly enough to live on and use my credit cards every month as I run out of money. I’m in debt and am currently sitting in the cold as I can’t put afford to put the heating on with an empty fridge. I don’t have any luxuries or waste money, the cost of living means even if I wanted to then I couldn’t.
Lots of people seem jealous of people who don’t work but claim benefits. Would you swap places with me? I could die tomorrow and no one would know until I didn’t pay the bills.