11 year old at LGBTQ school lunch club

[Hunnybadger1]

Just wondering what the general thoughts are on schools having clubs like this for 11 year olds? I personally feel like I’d rather my child went to a general interest club, or hung out in the library, as it feels young to be labelling themselves sexually. It’s such minefield for parenting and obviously don’t want to make them feel self conscious / close down communication so am being supportive but also asking them if they have other interests they want to explore too.

11 seems young, it depends if the group is for each year group or if you have 11 year olds and 18 year olds in the same room. It depends on the topics being discussed. Sexuality and being transgender are two very different topics, with being transgender potentially having physical implications on the person's body. It's great to have a support network when you are going through puberty, regardless of how you identify in your gender and sexual orientation, but I think if my 11 year old was attending a club where sensitive topics were being discussed, I'd want to know more about it.

@Petitchat Who do you think you are telling someone you’ve never met that they’re ‘not normal’?

I was madly in love with a boy in my class from being 6/7 to going to high school- it didn’t change in 5 years. Was it ‘normal’ when I was 11?

You do know that just because you didn’t experience something doesn’t mean it’s abnormal, in much the same way as you not seeing the value of a club for LGBT kids who might find value in it.

I couldn’t give two straws about the LGB but no child of mine would be anywhere near the TQ.

Who’s running this club? Activist staff? Activist sixth formers?

When I was a kid we weren't even allowed to be told that gay people existed! I think it's wonderful that it's only taken one generation to move form the insanity of Section 28 to clubs, or safe spaces, like this for young LGBTQ+ kids.

It's not about sex FFS, it's a nice friendly place for gay/nerdy/weird kids to hang out without being bullied. My kid goes - they eat sweets and do colouring in.

I don’t think an inclusive school needs clubs like that especially at such a young age. It’s just more liberal woke lefty BS and encourages cliques. Children don’t care about each others sexuality at that age and if anyone is being homophobic they should get disciplined accordingly.

Not this again. When you were 11, did you know you liked the opposite gender? Had you had an innocent school crush? If so why is it so hard to understand that 11 year olds know they are same sex attracted?

I would question why a club like this needs to be a thing rather than a general acceptance of sexuality throughout the school. (By sexually I’m not including children that like to pretend to be something that they are not eg cat, dog, male, female).

In what world is a club whose membership is defined purely by sexual preference not about sex.

It's odd IMO.

In the same way that when the vast majority of adults ask kids if they ‘have a girlfriend/boyfriend’ (and it’s always heteronormative relationships), they’re not generally referring to them actually having a sexual relationship.

Quick update that the club wasn’t on today, typical scatterbrained DC not to check details! They weren’t bothered and went off to a youth club after school with friends. Like the comments on this thread I’m torn between the importance of safe spaces for kids to be themselves, but also worry about spaces which may have an agenda or not be careful on how the groups are facilitated. One of the friends who thinks they are bisexual has suffered criminal abuse from a different sex / gender parent so can see how this could affect your outlook on relationships, especially when you are 11. But can also see how useful it could be to have peer support too! Arrgh! I guess I’ll just stay curious and supportive but will contact the school if I have concerns. Thanks everyone for your comments!

They absolutely do know.

No, its completely normal. Maybe study some actual college level texts on child development and get back to us.

Probably due to the enormous amount of hate going around your set towards Trans people, whom have always existed.

If I was 11 I would had have a fear of missing out attitude so would attend this club. Yet it is no different to have a heterosexual club…….As a parent I would be ok with a gay club. I would be worried about the T+. I would also ask about safeguarding and what resources are provided and by who?

It’s quite a common thing at secondary schools- it’s just a safe space for kids to hang out together, no agenda or ‘resources’ - as someone else said they just hang out and eat their lunch, maybe play uno or do some colouring!

Any school that needs a club to provide a safe space for lunch is a school with very big problems. Jesus. It’s 2025. Doesn’t help that the T is rank homophobia unfortunately.

My now Yr8 realised she was lesbian last year at 11yo... from the crushes she had on various characters in TV/film/books. Same as other girls having crushes on make characters. Its not too young to know what you like.

I've been quite relieved really about how accepting school children are these days. Because to be frankly honest, I was terrified for her as I know how cruel people can be about those outside the "norm". They don't have a school LGB club but I wouldn't object to her going.

Actually,he's a new to us ht and shithot on bullying. He was a twat on many other levels, but bullying he cracked down on like a ton of bricks.

No they have not 'always existed'. Transvestites/crossdressers, yes. But not transgender. They were extremely rare, not like the 6000% increase there is in children identifying as trans in Scotland. It's a form of social contagion, even doctors have said this themselves.

I wouldn't be worried. I went to a Catholic
Club and I've never been the slightest bit interested in religion. I just liked tbe people that went to it and the peace.

If your DC does turn out to be gay, I wouldn't see the issue. Better to let them be open and honest rather than repressed.

Surely that would be a concern with any lunchtime club. And girls are exposed to "the sexuality" of heterosexual boys daily at school or out of school (boys and men) when they are regularly sexually harassed and assaulted.

I think there is a very good arguments for smaller schools, middle schools and single sex schools but a LGBTQ+ club doesn't pose a risk more than any other across school club and there are significants risks to just being in school at all, with the way they are set up.