Daily Project round 8

[SpiritOfEdna]

A brand new shiny thread. Whether you want to do one extra thing a day, or a brain dump of what you have to do this is the place.

It’s a lot on your plate on your own @Mumtobabyhavoc. It really sounds like you are doing all the right things. There could be something going on so looking at that is a great idea. It is more likely just age and some jealousy. I think children can get pretty frustrated at that age. How is Havoc’s communication? One of my nephews was a bit of a nightmare until he could talk and actually communicate what he wanted.

I was guilty of losing my temper with DS at times. I found the book 123 Magic really helpful. Just the act of counting to three helped ME calm down a bit often.

We all have or had to figure out what works for us as parents and for our families. And we are all different and so are our children. We all parent differently I think.

One suggestion I would make is to try to keep a note of what triggers a tantrum - hunger or frustration or tiredness or overstimulation. Too much sugar, not enough down time, a late night etc etc. There can be a lot going on. I know you have said you don’t always get them to school as it’s not a requirement yet but maybe Havoc would benefit from a regular routine of school and some time away from the baby. Some kids thrive on regular routine. Same time up in the morning and same routine of bath, bedtime etc at night.

Oh and I think I have seen a book called The Explosive Child recommended on here too.

@Mumtobabyhavoc 🌷🌺🌸 💐.
Busy work day but am listening to a very boring town hall and managed to have a daytime bath and lunch. Multitasking heaven 😂
Today

• chase bathroom, window company and heating AND flooring companies for quotes. Am wondering whether it would be easier to get one company to project manage it for me for next year
• refpilates this morning so kit to be washed
• book SpiritDoggo in for a groom
• started building a click and collect list for shopping and a Costco trip on Friday after work
• need to buy some birthday presents
• the third volume of the Book of Dust is out tomorrow there may be nothing done for a day or so - I won’t be able to save it till the weekend 😂

I love having my car back! Have a good one, SoE

Oh @Mumtobabyhavoc 🥺❤️❤️

It happens to all of us, we all get these times. And it's nothing to blame yourself for, this is parenthood and life

This thread is my fave place on mn. Just so safe. And youre free to share as much or little as and when you need, thats the beauty of mn.

I saw your update as to the day improving - hopefully the next one is even better. Youre doing amazingly and I am in awe.

The kids are safe and happy and feel no worries about the stress they cause you because they know youre always there

One thing i think though, is today's stubborn child is tomorrows prime minister! At least I say that to myself when dd ignores me for the 8th time 😄🥰

Sounds like some positives @Mumtobabyhavoc .
Today hasn’t quite gone as planned - Junior Petaldog needed taking to the vets as he was very under the weather and had gunky eyes. He’s now on antibiotics and anti inflammatories poor boy and needs a return trip to the vets on Friday. I did manage to get to the jewellers to pick up some earrings I’d had altered, clean the bathrooms and change our bed linen onto cosy brushed cotton. Beautiful day here so a couple of loads of washing dried on the line too.

Morning all ( probably still evening for @Aria999 and @Mumtobabyhavoc as I'm awake ridiculously early)
All the hugs 🫂
I hope Junior Petal dog is soon on the mend @petalpower I'm envious of your line drying. I was in too late to hang mine out so it went in the dryer.
I like the way you make your job work for you @SpiritOfEdna You epitomise multitasking!

This is my favourite corner of MN too. It feels gentle and non-judgemental. I don't need any extra help to raise my stress levels so I try to avoid argumentative threads and sail along looking at what books we're reading and chit chat threads, occasionally amusing myself with the odd cleaning/hygiene ones.

And now I'm going to put my phone down and read my novel, which has a similar tone to this thread. The Friday Night Knitting Club by Kate Jacobs.

I hope you all sleep/slept well. I'm just listening to the clock ticking and the rain coming down ( plus a bit of squeaky tinnitus but I'm used to that)

Hugs to all.

I was thinking also of frustration that Havoc may feel with communication as well, like @Peridot1 . DS1 was non-verbal until he was 5 and it drove him to distraction not being able to communicate properly. Even when they are verbal, they often can't express themselves properly.

Anyway- I lost my temper with DS last week. He's 15! I don't feel good about it at all, but we are all human. (And the provocation was great). But he knows that my usual setting is calm, patient, respectful and that I'm human too. I guess what i am saying is that there will be many a time when you don't respond in the way you would prefer, but that's normal. I'm expressing myself clumsily but I hope you know what I mean.

Anyway- hugs to you. And hugs to everyone on our lovely thread.

Good morning everyone from a very soggy part of the country, I would like to share a rare efficiency achievement - just after 9am I had already accomplished something, sent my passport off for renewal! I doubt anything can top this level of achievement for the rest of the week 🤣

Good morning all. Wet and wild here.

Hope you are all doing ok with various trials and tribulations.

Not much achieved here yesterday. I ended up going shopping. Saw a dress online from a shop I really like and decided I’d go and try it on in a local town. Didn’t need it but medium was too big and small fit so I had to buy it! Haven’t bought small in anything for years. Probably the 80s.

Did some more painting of the garden room. It’s almost done. One more session will do it.

Today I’m being lazy so far. Still drinking tea and in PJs. About to do dishwasher and kitchen. Might do a bit of a deep clean as our neighbours might be coming over for dinner tomorrow and he sneezes a lot when he is here sometimes. So I am going to make sure it’s not my housekeeping and too much dust!

Wet and wild here too and forecast to stay the same all day I think. The dogs didn’t seem
to mind on their walk though and Junior Petaldog seems to be responding to the antibiotics.
Well done @SingleThreadJoiner2 . That’s a definite achievement!
Just waiting for my friend to arrive as we’re meeting for lunch at a local cafe!
Have a great day everyone!

I've missed a lot! Sorry you are having a hard time @Mumtobabyhavoc. Apologies if this is wide of the mark but is there any correlation between havoc's starting to melt down and the time at which you became a single mum?

DS is a handful and the 3-4 years were hard. He has always acted up more around big life changes. The months approaching the switch to kindergarten were bad.

you achieve so much and always seem so on top of things. Hang in there! Someone up thread said everything is a phase, it's so true!

*I don't mean correlation as you can't have a correlation between two points. Maybe 'coincidence of timing'!

Good afternoon everyone 🥰

Not so windy where I am in London but looking forward to it picking up 🍂😍

Someone linked this YouTube page where planes land, so might catch that after I catch up with big brother.

😄 well done @SingleThreadJoiner2

@WinterFrogs I love love listening to the rain coming down

@FourSeasonsLobelia happens to the best of us 🥺

@Aria999 which country are you in?

@petalpower my love to petaldog on their antibiotics

@SpiritOfEdna How's The Book of Dust vol 3?

Today's plans are to entertain dd with some sand and some biff and chip phonics books, make a fry up for our late lunch and figure out something for dinner

So far I've vacuumed our bedroom and the hallway, washed up and put on sausages in the oven so I feel justified in a little bit of relaxation whilst the food cooks

Have a lovely one all ❤️ and 👋 to anyone ive missed xx

@mumofoneAloneandwell I am a Brit living in America, east coast.

I also meant to say, awesome pumpkins @Mumtobabyhavoc! I need to get some at the weekend. We did do some from a pumpkin patch at the start of October but they went very moldy in about 3 days despite being sprayed with hydrogen peroxide.

I am insanely jealous @Aria999 😍😄😄, its my dream to live in NY on the east coast!!

I'd have Carrie Bradshaw's apartment but as close to the upper east side as possible 🤭🤭🥰

Well, since i'm dreaming, i'd have Charlotte's apartment!

Good morning everyone. 🩷
It's going on for 8am, but have been awake since 6am. Baby has a fever of 38.2 and a mucous-y sounding cough. I gave some Tylenol, nursed and now have a sleeping bub on me. 😇 Havoc and I have had a stuffy noses, but sinus rinses and nasal sprays are working for me, and saline sprays for Havoc. Keeping my eye on little one.
Had parenting meeting/counselling yesterday which helped. Ordered book recommended by @Peridot1 and another. Thanks. 🩷
Am a single mum by choice @Aria999 went it on my own as found out I could carry after years of thinking I couldn't, no partner/husband so decided to go it on my own. Best decision ever despite this rough bit. ☺️

I don't think I'm going to fall back asleep...
Plan is laundry. Does it ever end???? 😵‍💫
Had a lively afternoon yesterday. Took DC to shopping mall as needed a few things for Havoc and since it was pouring rain out we spent a couple hours there with them looking at shops and in the bookstore, particularly the kids' area with books and toys. Got home and starving so reversed dessert and dinner which they loved. 😋🩷 Had hot choc with marshmallows, two Halloween chocolates and some chai spiced cake, then penne with chicken and veg. Baths. Pumpkins and lights again. Baby crashed. Havoc cuddled with me for a bit on the couch watching tv.
I think I'll put some coffee on and start breakfast. I'm in the mood for pancakes...

Love to everyone. Your support has been amazing. ❤️

btw, didn't know about the peroxide trick for pumpkins. I'm expecting them not to last but the are staying outside. We might grow the family by another two...😂

🙌🙌🙌 @Mumtobabyhavoc

I wanted to go it alone but had dd through some really tough circumstances instead.

I am so grateful for the way things worked out, and agree: best decision ever 🥰

Have now made myself a latte, nixed the pancakes and have a slice of the chai loaf, put the heat on, done 5 perfect push-ups, plank and side planks and have got a talk show on. Kids are still asleep. 🤗

Wet and windy here too, though the sun came out an hour ago.

👋 @Aria999

@mumofoneAloneandwell I have been known to play rain sounds during heat waves...

I have done a lot of paper shredding today. Very old papers from my mother's loft. Quite a lot with my late father's handwriting on, and he's been gone more than twenty years 😔 Also found some very sentimental items which have come downstairs to show the rest of the family. The time has not yet come to sell her home but finances will force it soon enough so I'm getting ahead with non-sensitive possessions. She will never be well enough to go home but she retains mental capacity so I'm proceeding with great care.

House has got a little bit cluttered with general busyness so I need to address that. It never takes long but I'm putting it off. Have sat down with a cup of tea instead.

I cross posted with @mumofoneAloneandwell and @Mumtobabyhavoc

Much love to you both, deep in the trenches and doing so much without support 💕

Ps @Mumtobabyhavoc your planks reminded me: I have eased a lot of thigh pain through doing gentle streching, planks and squats. I am sounder than I've been for months despite stopping the nerve pain medication

@Mumtobabyhavoc - I had wondered if you were going it solo but never liked to ask. Well done you. A brave decision. And you will get through this tough patch. And then another one will come along! It’s just life. And parenting. The challenges change as they get older but they are all still there cropping up along the way.

And like wise @mumofoneAloneandwell. You have a lot in your plate too. I think you said DD is non verbal? A girl in DS’s class at school when he was about 8 or so had selective mutism when she was younger apparently- before she moved to his school. She was a couple of years older than the class as she was playing catch up a bit. She is now a lead singer in a rock band in the US…..

A more productive day here than I thought. Cleaned out the tea/coffee cupboard which has folding doors that stay open a lot and it was pretty dusty. Took everything out and cleaned the shelves, threw away lots of out of date flavoured teas and washed all the teapots and coffee pots. Cleaned the downstairs cloakroom including dusting down the walls. Did the same in the hallway. And vacuumed and washed the floors. Feeling accomplished! Also removed all scented candles and reed diffusers from downstairs cloakroom and kitchen in case that’s setting off neighbour’s allergies. Should help me too as I’m often very sneezy.

Crossed posted with you @WinterFrogs. Sounds like a productive day for you too. Glad your pain is a bit better. I do some stretches every morning before I get out of bed which helps my lower back. Exercise really does help although I avoided it for years!

I'm loving the non verbal classmate becoming lead singer in a rock band @Peridot1
There's some comfort right there @mumofoneAloneandwell 🎶

I'm normally very active, till this summer when I slowed down considerably, but I have taken to doing an actual proper routine which is very boring but has helped enormously so I'm not going to stop now.

👋 @WinterFrogs😊

makes sense @Mumtobabyhavoc ! Massive respect as that can't be easy.

One of my friends did the same though she originally planned to have 2 and I think has now decided 1 is enough. She has recently connected with some of the families of her DS brothers and sisters and they have a nice little community support group.