What do I eat when I’m dying?

[Okitsme]

I’ve just been given weeks to live.
I’ve found it very hard to eat for the last couple of weeks and am forcing myself to eat a certain number of mouthfuls while in hospital.
If you have looked after anyone in this situation what things did they like?
I loved food and cooking

Anything you would like to drink? In hospice I loved how they let patients have alcohol. My Dad had a taste of whiskey and ginger until very close to the end. Or a cold Coca Cola with ice. Or a glass of champagne. A hot chocolate?

Wishing you so much peace.

I’m so sorry. Do you have people who will bring in food for you that you fancy? I was in hospital recently and the food isn’t always very appealing.

If you struggle to eat much, complan is good, it’s like a light lunch in a milkshake, and comes in various flavours.

Snacking is probably better than trying to force down big meals.
What sort of foods are your favourites?

My dad liked sweet things so we took him a lot of things like rice pots , custard and trifles

I couldn't read this and run - I'm giving you the biggest virtual hug OP.

My great-aunt gave my great-uncle baby food at the end of his life. It sounds crazy but these days there are so many flavours, the textures are easy to swallow and the portions are not large. He enjoyed them served from a nice china bowl with a silver spoon.

My mum loved the foods she usually liked, such as a roast dinner, but she tended to nibble or suck on the food rather than eat the whole meal. She wanted the taste but didn't want to manage the food. I'd imagine asking for the foods you love but not feeling obliged to eat, just taste and nibble what you can manage. That way you can enjoy the textures and flavours but only consume what your body can manage.

Sorry OP. Can't imagine how this must feel. Eat what you want, when you want, if you want it. Nothing is more refreshing than a cold Coca Cola. Sending you a big hug.

Feel free to share yours thoughts here OP if you don't have anyone you are comfortable opening up to. It's particularly unfair that the dying person often feels they have to handle the grief of the living person instead of focusing on themselves. Have a moan, rant, or philosophise if you need to. We are all here to listen

it depends as others have e said why it’s so hard to eat.

Are you very constipated? Do you have nursing care, would they try laxatives or an enema? I’ve known that make people feel more like eating.

Is your mouth sore in some way? Have they checked for oral thrush? If you’re on painkillers can you have some half an hour before eating?

Are you feeling sick? Have you tried any anti sickness meds?

Ice cream is my go to, nice ice cream from small tubs or ice lollies. Id also go against the grain and say, rather than focus on calories, why not try something light and fresh like lemon or mango sorbet. Particularly if your mouth is dry. Likewise M&S do some really nice fruit fools as well as the creamy yogurts.

Could you fancy something moist like scrambled egg, or soup?

I am so so sorry to read your post @Okitsme

Do you like sandwiches? Instead of having two halves, you could cut the sandwich into triangle quarters so they are not as overwhelming. Also if you fancy a glass of wine or something alcohol tell your doctor during the ward round and they will prescribe it for you.

I’m so sorry to hear this Op, perhaps some cooling frozen yogurt, McDonalds Vanilla milkshakes are also delicious and maybe some of their skinny chips

Darling, you only need to eat if you want to. If you don’t, just drink.

But fruit might soothe you. Or fruit made into drinks.

I wish you much love on your journey. xx

A bit of melon

I'm so sorry to hear this, especially as you loved food.

My DF is in the same situation and just can't manage anything, but then we'll remind or suggest a food. The latest was scampi. He'd not had it in years but ate every bit with a load of peas and chips. I've not seen him eat like it in a very long time!

He loves a cake or biscuit. Eats porridge (bleurgh!) and a banana. A trifle, a custard maybe. Not much.

It's a case of wotcha fancy? What haven't you had for ages? Proper comfort food? Sausage and mash? A fried egg sarnie? A bag of Fruit Jellies, some crisps in a soft bread roll, a toasted jam and banana sandwich?

A little of what you fancy!

If you're a foodie, browse recipes and get your loved ones to cook and bring them to.you! Lobster thermidor with a side of cream doughnuts. Or Macarons!!! Ooh, I bet you could eat those all day long! I know I could. Even a single mouthful of something you had forgotten you loved to eat would bring you comfort, I'm sure. I see it in my DF.

OP, I am so sorry to hear this.
I hope those you love can be with you and their presence gives you some consolation.
As far as food goes, do you think you would like to try the purred food I the Wiltshire Farm Foods catalogue or similar?
Also, maybe experiment with home puree so you can have flavours you enjoy.
Similarly try things such as melted chocolate and ice cream.
So sorry xx

Huge hugs to you. My dad is currently in hospice and struggling to eat. The wonderful nurses said today it's not compulsory, you don't have to eat anything. I don't know you, but I'm sat beside you and my dad and I really do get it. I'm holding your hand and I'm here. Thinking of you xxx

If you are able to eat but only tiny amounts could you get a private chef type person to prepare small plates of canapés? Maybe good quality ice creams and sorbets? I hope you find something you can enjoy.

Hello my darling.

Rubbish situation 😔 - I'm so sorry you're going through this.

Ice-cream all the way ? Easy to get down, sweet and a bit calorific.

Or if you're savoury: bistro drinks ?

Sending love to you 😘

My darling, I think you can eat or drink whatever you like, whenever you like, or not as the case may be.

If it's sherry and fags, then let it be sherry and fags.

Have what you enjoy, or not.

Ps life's a total shit.

If you like comedy, can you get watch a really funny series? I love the (naughty and controversial now) little Britain and 'the office '. Watch something that makes you chuckle. Enjoy your precious time darling xx

This Is Just to Say

I have eaten
the plums
that were
in the icebox

and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast

Forgive me
they were delicious
so sweet
and so cold

Have whatever you feel you'd like OP, even if you end up not eating much or any of it.

Food can mean so much to us, can't it? Your post brought this poem to me. We picked plums from 'my tree' with my young son in my elderly parents' garden last week. We talked about how they planted the tree for me when I was young and how we'll plant a fruit tree for my son in our garden.

The plums really were sweet and delicious and bring so many memories.

I hope you get to have some tastes of things that you enjoy and bring you comfort and good memories. Wishing you a peaceful night x

Oooooh I'd love sherry and fags. Not terminally ill though. Op is bless her soul : sherry and fags for you!!!

I'm so sorry. Eat anything that takes your fancy and I won't blame you if you try all the recreational drugs on the market x

I wish I could help, OP.

My mother would have something like a cheese sandwich and a cup of tea. She'd only take a bite, but felt she was eating something.

I am so sorry op. 💐💐💐