Why is this mum so angry at me?

[Ohhilois]

So, dd asked if I could take her and her friend to the cinema. They are 11, (both 12 in November).

The kids worked out what they would like to see, the new Jurassic World film. I text his mum, saying I would book the tickets for it and take them, I checked she was okay with the film choice. She said yes, amazing, thanks so much. I took them this afternoon, they had a great time and both loved the film.

We got back, the kids had dinner here and then she picked him up, all smiles.

This evening, she absolutely kicked off at me over text as she says she didn’t realise it was a 12A and she can’t believe I took her son to see something so inappropriate, she feels so let down after leaving her son in my care, and she will take it further with the cinema, whatever the hell that is supposed to mean.

I just can’t be arsed with this madness. I don’t know where it’s suddenly come from. I checked the film choice with her prior to booking. The boy wasn’t scared or anything, he loved it. He was talking to me and dd about the previous Jurassic World films at dinner - in depth, so he has seen them.

I’ve replied that I am really sorry for any misunderstanding, I asked her if the film choice was okay before I booked but I think she’s blocked me. I mean, ffs, it’s ridiculous, right? Thank god they are going to different secondary schools.

I hate bloody 12A!!!!

The first movie I ever watched at the cinema was Jurrasic Park at the age of 7. That movie had a PG rating back then (since amended to 12A) and someone had their arm ripped off and another was eaten on the toilet!

OP take it as a blessing as she has revealed herself to be a massive unreasonable pain in the a**e. Now you know where you stand you can be civil as a minimum and avoid interacting any more beyond that.

nice one 😂

You said he's seen all the previous films but aren't most of them 12A too? So she was happy enough for him to watch them when he was even younger than he is now.

Surely the clue is in the title? What on earth did she think “Jurassic World” was going to be about? She sounds completely ridiculous.

Someone messing with her phone?

I'm not surprised you're up to 90 with this mother's U-turn on things. You did your due diligence, you told her what they had chosen - she had the opportunity to check the age cert, how scary it might be etc - and she could have said no.
You've been very nice in apologising, along with pointing out that you had checked with her about the film. Download that conversation in case she decides to delete it.... and then put her out of your mind.

Crazy woman. She should have checked the rating if she's that concerned

Maybe she is confused about what 12A means. It just means that under 12s can see the film if they are with a parent/guardian who has deemed that the child is mature enough to watch.

The cinema aren’t going to do anything because they don’t stop under 12s attending that are accompanied.

If they mother was upset that their child was scared then she should have checked the content herself on the BBFC website before okaying the film choice.

For what it’s worth, I do think many of the 12A films really push the boundaries and can have some quite disturbing violence and horror in them. I think it would be better if we still had a 12 but the major studios push to get a wider audience in.

Both kids are nearly 12 so I think you have made the right decision but the mum was in the wrong to defer her parenting to you then get mad when things went wrong.

Im guessing a few people got eaten by dinosaurs. I’d have been fine with that at 12, by brother would have been terrified until much older. Some people just react differently to horror. (Not a horror film but BBFC gives it a 3 out of 5 for horror/threat)

Honestly you did nothing wrong. As people said 12A is somethings much younger children are allowed to watch with an adult. The cinema did nothing wrong - 12A means 12 or over alone or any child with adult. You also told her the movie title and she could have vetted it then. I wouldn’t worry about the boy being scared - the clue was in the title of the movie - it has scary dinosaurs!
There is no point trying to understand her or passify her as the way she has behaved is properly overboard and bordering on crazy. God help her son!
Tbh if it was me I would not even care - people be crazy and that’s their choice!

I cant explain all the ways the kid wasn’t scared.

It really wasn’t that! I’ve got 4 children of my own, it’s really hard for them to fake not being scared that well for hours and hours during and after. He’s been on a group chat with dd and their other friends this morning, I hear everything that is said, he was chatting to the other kids who had already seen it.

I don’t know what her problem was. Bad day? But I would stake my life on the fact that he wasn’t scared of the film.

It couldn’t have been a nightmare or bedtime issues either - she text me at 9 o clock last night and again, they were all laughing away on a group call, dd was sat next to me, I could hear him (lots of group calls as they are a lovely bunch of geeks who are working on some fan fiction comics together).

I feel really sorry for that lad. His mum’s going to be a real liability.

That's ridiculous.. you did nothing wrong..
If she wanted details she should have checked it.out herself...think most people would be aware of these films

Could it be a fit of envy on her part - perhaps her son was raving on about what a good time he had with you and your DD? Or maybe she doesn’t want him hanging out with girls? I’ve met mums like this, who think their sons will be emasculated if the have close friendships with strong girls. Whatever it is, thank goodness you don’t need to have anything to do with her going forward!

She is being unreasonable. You checked the film choice before with her, that was on her to do more research, if she was that concerned a quick google would have told her the film rating and more info about it. Don’t think anything more of it, it’s a her issue not a you one.

I have 12/9 year olds and this is ridiculous. I admit I might question a 12+ decision for the younger one without checking with me first (although it's actually my older one who gets frightened easily), but generally speaking I don't leave my kids with anyone I don't trust. You went one step further and asked and got permission and checked in... and the children were barely under the age limit anyway. Can't actually work out what on earth she's on about!

In high school your daughter can maintain a relationship with whoever she likes on her own so I'd just put the kids in touch with each other directly and step away from the strange mother.

Have you tried sending a normal text message? She might have only blocked you on WhatsApp but forgot that you can still text unless you're blocked on her phone. She sounds nuts anyway and clearly doesn't understand what 12A means.

She's off her head. Its actually her fault for not checking what film her son was going to see, not yours, you gave her the information so it was her responsibility to check and agree or not. I wonder if her husband kicked off so then she had to kick off at you. I guess if shes blocked you you'll never know, but I have known dynamics like this and if that's the case feel sorry for her and her son.

I'd text her and ask if she was pissed last night!

If not she's not well mentally.

This is actually really positive, at least you know never to entertain her son again!! What a whack job!

She gave her permission for her soon to go. The problem is her!

There’s always someone looking for an argument.

He's most probably gone home said what a great time he's had & you did this an that for him, tea was great your a good cook an she's got jealous & threatened

Sounds to me like she’s mentioned it someone else and they’ve got in her head about it and made her feel like she shouldn’t have let him go. Like her mum or MIL or someone like that.

Just ignore her. If the kids have for each others numbers they’ll stay in touch through that

The only parents who treat film ratings as gospel are lazy parents.

She's obviously a lazy parent, or a stupid one.