Why are there so many men on this site?

[19ptrialprice]

There seems to be an increasing number of men on this website. These men appear to present themselves as straight cisgender men. This isn’t a trans issue. I don’t understand why a website that was created specifically for mums have a large number of men on it.

I understand why childfree women join as there are a lot of threads that are not about parenting. Childfree women will also use the site to get advice on TTC or miscarriage which are women exclusive, in the sense that women are the ones that give birth and also have to go through miscarriage. Men of course will experience child birth and grief but it’s the women, whose bodies have to experience this. Women have a shared experience of being a woman for example starting your period, growing breasts, TTC, miscarriage and menopause. Something that men’s body will never experience. Of course men are entitled to use this site but why should women have to put up with the men that are making sexist goady comments, which they are a lot of.

Should say this post is influenced by a man who told me to fuck off on this site after I called him out on his sexist behaviour.

But there are numerous websites specifically for dads and single dads. Why didn’t he get advice from there, surely he would relate more to other men that have been widowed rather than a woman.

Highly doubt all the single mums on here are on dad websites asking advice about boy related issues they have never experienced.

He hasn't sought MN out, Google has sent him in this direction because so many answers to mundane life questions have been answered here. It does similar with Reddit.
I eventually set up an account for similar reasons - I was waved in this direction so many times for answers or advice about such a wide range of subjects that it made sense to start using it as a primary source.
I'm not a parent (shoot me now) but I haven't needed to be a parent to discuss WLI, beauty advent calendars, TV shows etc. While I've been here I've picked up so much from a parents POV that's been really helpful as an aunt and a friend to parents.

I’m not a mum, but I am a woman. (I don’t post on the pregnancy / childbirth / parenting threads, but I’m on AIBU, relationships and books a fair bit.)

Is it weirder that I’m here when I’m not a parent, or that a man who is a parent is on here?

genuine question - I’m not being snarky

@DownAndOut25 I think it's weirder that men post here than women without children. By far.

Spot on!

A childfree woman and a father aren’t comparable. We’ve already discussed that a dad who is genuinely asking advice is fine. But the point of the thread is straight single men commenting sexist comments.@DownAndOut25

For those saying it wasn’t created as a women’s site but rather a parents site. Why is there a dedicated women’s health section but not a men’s health section. Surely if it was created for both women and men equally there would have been a men’s health section too?

Why did you use the term 'cisgender'? There is no such thing as 'cisgender'. It doesn't exist. Just man or woman. You sound brainwashed to use such silly cult terms.

These men appear to present themselves as straight cisgender men. This isn’t a trans issue.

You say it's not a trans issue. So WHY use trans ideology cult words then?

Why not just say man?

Yes cis gender is clearly the issue here 🤣

It is definitely a far bigger issue than men being on here. That's for sure. Someone brainwashed to use misogynistic cult words is a real concern. Far greater than just men being on here.

The website wasn't created specifically for mothers. At the time it started there was a site called parents net, and another called UK parents which was very popular.
Do you also believe that only tall strong fighting women should be allowed to use Amazon, or only matchstick people should use Tinder?

Do you also believe that only tall strong fighting women should be allowed to use Amazon, or only matchstick people should use Tinder?

Spectacularly misses the point being made by so many. Terrible examples.

Okay here's another example.
Im guessing baby lotion was originally created to soothe and hydrate baby's skin.
Im also guessing that today, most bottles of baby lotion are no longer bought by parents for their babies, but purchased by adults for themselves to use as a tanning aid, moisturiser, shaving aid and massage aid. So despite the literal name of "baby lotion", which would imply "a lotion for babies", insanely enough, its no longer primarily used that way.
Presumably you dont find that "baffling" or "hard to understand"?

Considering MN is a place where you can find huge amounts of discussions happening about periods, endometriosis, menopause, TTC, abortion, vaginal problems, breast and ovarian cancer, women's beauty, health and style, sex from a primarily female perspective, feminism and women's rights, relationships and specifically the imbalanced/abusive/coercive dynamics that abound in heteronormative relationships...
Id say its much weirder for a man to be here than you

Women who say they never want children, I wonder why they're here when it's promoted as a site for parents.

Perhaps he wanted a woman’s opinion 🤣

But presumably women who choose not to have children are still female, right?

Which group of humans has the largest experience of female related health issues? That would be mothers.

Who can the non-mums turn to for advice on such matters? Mums, that's who.

There are Mums and sisters on here for women who need them. It should be a safe space for women.

I don’t get it either, I joined to get parental and menopausal guidance. I see when men post they are given a lot of good, honest advice.

My dad introduced me to AIBU. We share topics that make us laugh. My mum
and sister think we need to get a life, but I love that it’s ’our Thing’

YANBU OP. I had a post deleted the other day responding to the out and out misogyny of one of the male posters. Guess what? MN didn't delete any of the crap he posted. MN has gone to the dogs.
We can't even have a sex topic without men waiting for salacious details.

Because men are parents and partners and get worried and need advice too

I don’t like it. They are always interfering with sensitive subjects like domestic violence or emotional affairs for example, where their advice is almost always guided to benefit the men in the situation. They should go to dadsnet, I am sick of the relentless male voice and look for women and mothers to talk about shared experience without them tbh.

It’s not parentsnet.

It is Mumsnet for Mums.

I don’t want or need their point of view thanks.

Some of the men come here for excellent advice and discussion, as the non-mum women do. Some get a kick out of reading intimate conversations between women. And no doubt there are many other reasons. Nothing to be done about it without some kind of expensive ID checks.