He’s hit me and I don’t know what to do

[ThinkINeedHelp]

I’m crying and I probably won’t make much sense but please try to help me see straight.
Had an awful evening. I know it started as my fault. I was cross as trying to house train two puppies but it’s been a bad day with them today. I was a bit annoyed and swore. I didn’t swear at anyone, it was a case of oh ffs, this is getting ridiculous.

He was angry with me and we argued. It’s eventually ended up with him grabbing my wrists, shoving me against the bedroom wall and then hitting me in the face. My nose hurts, so does my shoulder.

I’m now going to be homeless. I’ve no family, no friends anymore, don’t work and I live in his house. I’m so utterly pathetic.i can’t drive as I’ve had two glasses of wine but come tomorrow I’ll have to leave.
I’ve allowed myself to end up in this position , I’m in my late 50’s and I can’t believe I’ve been so bloody stupid.

Well done. What a relief.now you can plan your life.

Lovely to see this. All the best. XX

You've not had any messages so I bet he's terrified you've gone to the police. If he does start messaging you, then you really should report him He'll keep quiet for a few days then when police don't show up he'll think he's got away with it. And police WILL help if you need anything from the house. Fantastic that you're out and keeping strong.

Whereabouts are you located Op? I might be able to help you with accommodation, send me a private message.

Thank you so much @AmelieSummer25 . Your words truly mean a lot .
It’s shocking how many women are going through this . My heart goes out to all of them .
I truly believe I was meant to go through what I did to get me to where I am now .
Don’t get me wrong it isn’t all plain sailing as ex still trying to control and manipulate me through the children but I am in much better position now to handle it and I’m so much calmer and I never thought I’d say it but I’m stronger too .
Regarding ex , I feel nothing for him not even hate just nothing . He’s engaged to the woman he met whilst I was going through cancer now. I’m nowhere near ready to start dating again.
Anyway I don’t want to take up anymore of OPs thread but just wanted to say it does get better xx

Hi @isthismylifenow . How are you? I remember you from my threads .
No your right , leaving was taken out of my hands because I don’t think I would ever have found the strength or courage to do so but the best thing ex ever did for me was throw me out onto the streets. I don’t think I’d be here now living and breathing if I was still there .
Im so so proud of OP she is being so strong and I wish I could give her a big hug .
Im so sorry you went through this too @isthismylifenow . Sending you a big hug xx

Glad you're okay @ThinkINeedHelp baby steps

Hi @ThinkINeedHelp .
Im glad to hear you managed some sleep even if it was on and off .
Right now is all about you and getting your strength up to start your new life free of an abusive narcissist. Sleep and rest when you can.
You’re bound to feel wobbly you’ve been through so much and it’s ok to cry and feel upset . I was told that crying is your hearts way of speaking what your lips can’t .
Your doing so well look at you already applying for jobs . I’m in awe of you OP xx

Me too, I bet a decent percentage on people on here have a moustache 🥸

but you can fix that with a bit of hair removal cream…he cant fix his entire personality. He is a dick and I hope you do get away soon (sorry if you already have , I’m only partway through the updates)

Ah brilliant you are out. Please drive somewhere random with your phone turned on, then turn off find my iPhone completely and drive back to your safe place. Might as well make it as hard as possible for him to track you

I think it's the shock of what you've been through that's giving you the wobbles. Long term, leaving was totally the right thing to do. Let us know how you're getting on as and when you're able.

Fantastic idea

I remember the posters who helped me along my journey too, and I always wonder if a total stranger on the internet even knows how much they have helped someone along the way. I think when you have been in this situation, a protective mode for other struggling women just automatically activates. So seeing your update has really made me happy, and you would not have even known.

@ThinkINeedHelp it is the same for you. There are a bunch of us here routing for you.

You should be incredibly proud of yourself for walking away. Don’t ever forget that x

Omg I teared up when I read your update.

58 and you're just beginning your life now after 20 years of hell.

You are incredible. Thank you for sharing your journey and if even just one woman reading this gathers the courage to leave their abusive partners, how amazing would that be!!!

Good luck job hunting OP

Strength and luck @ThinkINeedHelp.❤️

Yes, it is shocking how many women are going through it, but honestly your situation was one if the worst I have ever heard.

You are strong. You do sound 'in a good place' now.

Stupid woman, but we already knew that!!

if your situation could get better, any ones can!!

lots of love 💕 & 💪🏼

I honestly don’t think I’ll ever be able to show or thank everyone how much the support meant to me then and even now . They will always hold a special place in my heart . I truly believe that sometimes in life you meet people in some way or other who have such a huge impact on your life and those women on MN who took the time to support me , give me words of courage and give me strength and advice when I needed it the most just makes my heart feel so full.
And I know that the OP will have so much support too xx

Thank you so much @AmelieSummer25 your words mean so so much.
It’s so hard to believe that things will get better when you’re going through the worst of it but they truly do .
When you reach rock bottom the only way is up. I wish I could give OP a big hug and tell her everything will be ok.
Sending lots of love back to you too lovely 🥰🥰🥰xx

Hi OP hope your day is going well. Don’t worry if you feel wobbly and down some of the time, of course you will. Things will get better. It’s great to think of you in your hotel room.

What a Wonder Woman you are! 🌟 Stay strong! He has no power over you now. Take some time to rest, recover, speak to your doc and the police if you feel able. Your life begins again now. 😘

Well don't for escaping. Block his number so he can't rant at you and verbally abused you any more. Keep strong.

What a bloody wonderful bunch you all are!
I messaged my step brother, the one who lives a few miles away. He phoned me about an hour ago, I told him everything. He’s offered me his little spare room! I told him I hadn’t contacted him for a roof but he said he wanted to help, he told me I’d changed from being with my now ex. Funnily enough I remember him saying that to me a few years ago.
Im going to his house this evening and will stay there until I’m sorted.
I actually can’t thank you enough for giving me the help, advice and support.
I know it’s only the beginning and I’ve a very long road ahead but I’ve started.

So very happy for you, don’t look back but look forward to happier times.
You’ll smash this and have a great new life….. and we’re all rooting for you! 🌟

Excellent, what a lovely step brother.