What fairly normal things do you not let your DC do?

[Mayflyoff]

I won't let my DC have candles, my 14 yo is not impressed. I also don't let them go on fairground rides, though I'm OK with permanent rides at theme parks. Are there things you don't let your DC do, that their friends seem to do?

No smart phone until secondary.

There is definitely some extreme paranoia and anxiety on this thread, but tbf that's probably fairly reflective of society overall. Some of my examples are probably equally batshit but make absolute sense to me...others I think are/were probably fairly sensible. DC now 21/15/12.

No fizzy drinks till age 10 (though DS3 probably sneaked in a few earlier than that age, third child etc etc...)

No phones until age 11

No electronic noise of any kind (including TV/radio/music) in the mornings before school, ever - we're so much calmer without people trying to talk over radio noise or getting distracted by screens

No screens at the dinner table

Phones in a different room and switched to silent whilst homework is completed

No TVs/games consoles upstairs (for anyone - DH and I included)

DC's phones left charging downstairs overnight until GCSEs are done. (After that, phones can be taken upstairs overnight....I think it's important that older teen DC try and learn to self-regulate before going to university...no-one's going to tell them to leave their phone downstairs once in halls)

No pyjama days, or dressing gowns/slippers to be worn for extensive periods during the day, unless genuinely ill (v bad for mental health to stay in pyjamas etc all day imo)

Encouraged to get out of the house at least once a day during holiday times, even if for just a quick walk around the block (again, I think it's bad for mental health to stay in the house all day)

I would also say absolutely no ear piercing till 11 but in all honesty that's never been a rule I've had to enforce - all mine are boys and none of their friends have ear piercings so it's simply never been an issue as they've never asked. I suspect this would have been a more difficult situation if I'd had a DD, though.

No food or drink except water in bedrooms. I was convinced that if I budged on this, there would be rotting bananas under the beds and infestations of various pests.

At 17, DC1 put it to me very nicely that they would take full responsibility for the consequences, and pointed out that they were actually the tidiest person in the household, so they got an exemption. Years later when DC2 reached a similar age, they also got the rule relaxed.

I still hate it when DH takes a soda upstairs though. He is a very mucky pup! 😂

No food upstairs.
No phones until secondary.
No tvs in bedrooms.
No tablets at the table.

Until this thread I hadn't thought tio deeply about sleepovers, but I'm not comfy with that until they're older (except grandparents)

I was no gaming until older too, but dh is a pc gamer, so ds (5) plays minecraft and is currently being educated on the switch with sonic, zelda, crash bandicoot, donkey kong, mario and spiro 🤷‍♀️ I won't win this battle.

And no touching the button at pedestrian crossings 🧐

Agree with this. Find some of this quite upsetting and controlling. Not allowing a 17yo to play an 18 game - wtf?! I have a 17 year old and we regularly chat about films/progs that we’ve watched which are definitely over 18.

I’m pretty chilled, even though my 17yo says I’m not. Rules are now that she has to have Find My on so I can see where she is and she has to let me know her general itinerary.

She, and all her mates, have been allowed some cider etc at parties since they were 15/16 but the novelty wore off and now she’s driving she doesn’t drink. She’s is off to festivals this year too…shock horror!

I was given similar freedoms and turned out to be a relatively boring 40 something with a professional job.

It has to be incremental, surely? You can’t just set them off in to the wild at 18 having not prepped them properly and expect them to be OK? They will be the ones completely out of their depths in potentially dangerous situations they’ve not been taught to handle.

Fags n weed
Coke n speed
But I draws the line at crack.

Oh, and trampolines.

Dd is not allowed to wear leggings as trousers except for actual sport/physical exercise.

To be clear, I do not consider a 10 year old in leggings to be sexualised. It's just me making my small fight back against a culture that has taught us that "normal" or "casual" or "comfortable" for women also has to be skin tight.

99% of people who know i have this rule think I am ridiculous.

All those parents controlling and manipulating their kids lives, lets take a guess where that's gonna end.
Hmmm, had a thought, they are gonna rebel against you.
Your children are not your puppets to control.
They are going to do shit or something good, with support.
That's your choice, support them in whatever they choose.

If I was reading a story aloud to my kids, it couldn't be one in which characters were horrible to each other on a regular basis. Enid Blyton and Roald Dahl for example. I skipped right over most of Harry Potter's upbringing with the Dursleys.

The kids would have been welcome to read those books for themselves, but I wasn't having anything to do with them.

Those electric scooters.

I'm just aware of hazards I suppose, like many other parents on this thread. It takes seconds to chop up a few grapes, so I don't see the point of not doing it. Likewise with a car seat - we have to have one, so why not go for the safest option? No brainer really. We're all just trying to do the best for our kids, I hope.

Mine are grown, but we never gave them juice, squash or fizzy drinks when they were young. No sweets either. Might sound draconian to some, but it’s incredibly easy to just never buy them 🤷‍♀️

We didn’t enforce what they did at friends’ houses, but they never got a taste for sugary stuff.

I got my ears pierced when I was about 8. Did PE every week in both primary and secondary. Rounders, hockey, basketball, athletics, dance - never once had to tape them or use plasters over them. Never once caught them, tore them or got infected.

I still don’t allow my children ( one of which is 14!!) to have Lolly pops 🤦‍♀️😂 terrified of them choking .

Playdates in Secondary 🤣

These restricted kids are going to go absolutely insane as soon they are out of their parents clutches.

Some of you are absolutely mad. Good lord.

Uni will be wild. It was always the ones with strict parents who went bananas when they left home.

Mopeds/scooters get a hard no from me too but the kids have never been interested in them.

About the sleepovers though, no regrets there. Kids come here, mine have done group camping trips and taken kids away with us and were never bothered about not sleeping over. It’s possible to balance risks and fun. We discussed this at length on a camping trip when away for a team sporting event. The three other parents who didn’t allow these included a CP SW, a policeman and a school safeguarding lead. Keeping to this hasn’t stopped my children or their friends identifying us as the relaxed house!

Where does it become ridiculous then?
Some females will have hit there full adult height at 14.

Checking the WHO growth charts even kids on the 0.4 centile will have hit 135 by 14. Or it's seek medical advice.