Messy situation - pregnant with wfb's baby

[Namechanged140525]

Very tricky situation, I am neither of these people, but I'm trying to help as much as I can but don't know what advice to give. I am friends with Sarah and know of Joe.

Let's call the woman Sarah and the man Joe.

Sarah is a British citizen, she is 45 years oldand has four children, 20, almost 18, 13, and 10 (two eldest and two youngest have different fathers)

Sarah divorced her first husband after he became a drug addict, her second husband suddenly passed away. A year or two later she met a 20 year old man, Joe (now 24), non-British (this is relevant for the story) on a dating app. They dated for a couple of years but decided to break up as Joe's parents are very religious and wouldn't accept Sarah.
Sarah and Joe remain best friends and have casual sex.
A while later, Joe announces that since his student visa's expired, he has to move back to his home country (all his family including parents and siblings still live in the UK).
Sarah offers to go to his home country and the two youngest kids to visit.
Sarah falls in love with the country despite not speaking the language and decides to move there a few months later with her two youngest children.

Joe and Sarah are still casual, he sometimes sleep over at hers, he doesn't have a permanent address and airbnb hops, but she stays at his from time to time too. Joe gets along with the children and even accompanied them and Sarah on the kids' first day of school.

Sarah unexpectedly gets pregnant. Joe asks her not to tell his parents and suggests an abortion, Sarah wants to keep the baby and tells his parents, in the hope that they will make him see some sense.
The whole family blocks her and Joe ghosts her, move out from his airbnb, and is nowhere to be found.

Sarah is a (smallish) social media influencer.
She calls him out and publicly posts his name and socials.

Joe is unaware of it and shared all his details including his phone number on said socials.
He doesn't want to be a father, he is now engaged to a girl his age as his parents disapprove of the age gap.
Joe and Sarah live in a religious country where having children out of wedlock is a crime.

What would you do?
Also, would you let Joe know?
Sarah refuses to take down his details

This.

She hasn't been to the UK since she's moved there. She only travelled back and forth once for the vacation before she moved there.

She sold her house (that she shared with her ex husband) and used the cash to save for a car, put down a deposit for her rent, and I guess she uses some of her savings for schooling and healthcare. Her kids school is approximately £6000/year per child. I am not sure how much healthcare is, but I believe giving birth at a private hospital costs around £600 to £1000.

Her rent for a 3 bed flat is approximately £400 a month and bills come to around £40 a month from what she told me, if I remember well. She also says food is much cheaper.

Her UK wage also allows her to afford a lot more things.

I know that the first appartment she moved in was for short lets only, but the landlord agreed to her living there for almost two years. He's recently asked her to move out as he wants to turn it into an airbnb, I just know she's managed to find a new landlord. I am not sure if the contract is under the name of one of her friends there of it's just not that strict.

As for schooling, they go to a private british school, so the government doesn't have the same requirements for international schools.

Will her children be safer there if she gets arrested and sent to jail? What does she think would happen to her children then? Or will her baby be happy if she gets deported and isn’t allowed to take the baby with her? She needs to grow up and think of the consequences of her foolish decisions

Surely no one is that stupid. What a mess.

Yes that's a mess. What was Sarah thinking of? She's bonkers.

Sarah is a bear of very little brain.

Her UK wage also allows her to afford a lot more things.

So she’s working remotely? I wasn’t sure if social media influencing was her actual job or an extra.

What would you do?

Nothing. It’s not my business. Sarah is an adult. Sarah is a parent, and she should be able to navigate this mess she’s put herself and her two youngest children in. She sounds selfish.

All you can do OP, is give her advice. You can’t do anything physically to change her situation.

Sorry, I should have been more clear.

Yes, she works remotely but also does sm part time

I believe this bit - countries that are strict about sex before marriage don’t always force it on foreigners / non-Muslims.

Where she could get caught out is custody of the child, as it usually goes to the father.

And why on earth did she contact his mum? She sounds like a child herself.

She’s a fool who is messing with her children and unborn child’s life. I have no sympathy for her.

Seeing as you say she’s an influencer, what’s her Instagram?

I completely forgot to address the social media batshittery. Have any consequences happened? Did anyone call / text him as a result of his details being shared? I mean that’s one way to piss a man off and get him to take legal action against you.

If this is true then there isn’t much anyone can do is there but I hope she comes back to the UK …

They always ask for their papers.

I think it’s appalling that the younger two’s father was happy for her to take them out of the UK and live in circumstances which would, in the most positive light, be described as risky.

She’s an idiot to not at least try to normalise her visa status within the new country.

Did the 20 and nearly 18 year old go out there with her too?

She's got herself in an unbelievable mess.

Does her company know?

If she doesn’t have the right to work in the country she can be deported. She and the company she works for can be liable for tax in that country as well. Let alone breach of company policy.

She is playing with fire with the country she is living in, having a baby when unmarried, working illegally (remote work for a UK company is still work in the resident country), illegal residency (what some call an illegal immigrant in the UK), and potentially setting herself and her company up for tax obligations and violation of company policies.

Let alone doxxing the baby’s father.

This will likely end in tears.

I think it’s appalling that the younger two’s father was happy for her to take them out of the UK and live in circumstances which would, in the most positive light, be described as risky

OP said the father of the younger two was dead.

I think it’s appalling that the younger two’s father was happy for her to take them out of the UK

Doesn't the op say he's dead? 🤔

Sarah sounds unbelievably stupid and beyond any help.
What was she thinking?

Sarah clearly has poor judgment, but seems determined to stick to her decisions. She’s endangering her children and it’s a shame that their father isn’t alive to protect them from their mother’s stupidity. There’s not much you can do.

Poor children.

The cost for the older two children to go to school is £12,000 pa. She pays for schooling and healthcare from savings. However, you said “she basically escaped poverty”.

Sarah thinks her life is a Bridget Jones movie and Sarah is going to get a fright when she realises it’s not

I can't believe that she abandoned her older two kids, and is now pregnant by a boy not much older that her oldest. Crazy. I'm not surprised the boy's parents encouraged him to steer clear of her. She needs to start putting her kids first.

She thinks because she’s not a citizen she can’t get arrested?
OMG I’m laughing!
In the US, that’s EXACTLY why they arrest you.
Then they deport you to some random South American prison and nobody ever sees you again.
What a naive, silly woman.