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Original poster

Is pissing in the park a giant red flag?

132 replies

enkelt2 · 08/05/2025 20:45

So I just met a new friend, and we were having a chat in the park. He then stood up, saying 'I'm going to have to relieve myself soon'. We chatted for 3 more minutes, then he excused himself.

He came back, admitted to having relieved himself in a corner of the park.

I feel that it's not great to admit you just pissed in public. But how big of a deal is it really? And how do people feel about this? I have witnessed random men pissing in the park before...

I think the act itself not okay, but more than that, I find his totally being ok and telling me about it, a bit more disturbing than the fact of having done it.

Not looking to date this person. Just curious how you'd feel about this? Would you still hang out with them, etc.

I guess I'm just a bit shocked, since his demeanour is very calm and logical and it just doens't seem like something he'd do (and admit to doing!).

OP posts:
Original poster
enkelt2 · 09/05/2025 15:36

It was a big park, and I think he did it discreetly. He's young, probably no medical conditions, nearest toilet about 5min walk, but he wouldn't know where it is as he's new to the park. (As I said, my bad for not pointing it out to him!)

In any case, it stopped bothering me about 20 hours ago. 😂I've decided there are much bigger things that are worth breaking a friendship for. I'm still glad I asked and got to see how people feel about this!

OP posts:
Icexream · 09/05/2025 16:12

It depends what you mean by park. Town park with swings etc, absolutely not.

Country park without facilities or a long way from the facilities, OK discreetly. I don't think it's terrible that he told you where he was going.

Icexream · 09/05/2025 16:14

CovidMemories · 09/05/2025 09:14

I don't understand all the people saying this is always men.

It's pretty much always men if we're talking weeing in the street, near enough to toilets that could have been used.

But on longer walks, in a mixed group, my experience is that it's the women who need to nip behind a tree first!

Show quote history

Yes, when I've been on organised walks the leader often has a designated wee stop, where we all disappear behind a wall or hedge.

Birdist · 09/05/2025 16:17

Out in the countryside, the odd nature wee is absolutely fine. How do you think hikers manage, or farmers?

In a park, grim.

DiggyDoodad · 09/05/2025 16:19

OrangeAndPistachio · 08/05/2025 20:50

Urinating outdoors is only acceptable if its a child in desperate need. An adult should be able to wait , or look for a public toilet or coffee shop.

I'm guessing you've never been for a long walk!

It's not always possible (nor is it desirable, as it's not good for ones urinary/bladder health) to hold onto urine until a toilet is available.

BobbyBiscuits · 09/05/2025 16:24

It's not the best, but if there is no toilets anywhere near and you need to go, then you have to I guess. I've had to pee in the bushes in the park before. Not my finest hour for sure, but it was a secluded area that I used.
Maybe he was a ketamine addict or had bladder cancer or something? Or had been drinking plenty of booze?
Either way I wouldn't say it's necessary that severe of a red flag in isolation. Everyone needs a wee sometimes?!

Missj25 · 09/05/2025 18:37

ItGhoul · 08/05/2025 22:50

Depends on the park, where he went and how visible he was, whether there were loos available.

I regularly run in a huge park - for perspective, you can do a five-mile walk without retracing your steps. It includes two playgrounds, open parkland, woods, a lake and loads more. There’s one set of loos and they close at 5pm; park is open until dusk. If someone was walking their dog after 5pm and they needed a wee, their only option is pissing up a tree, basically.

Last year I was running around 8pm and saw a dog tied up on its own. Park was basically deserted. I was worried it had been abandoned and had stopped to say hello to it when a man of about m 60 emerged, mortified and hugely apologetic, from the bushes and explained it was his dog and he’d been caught short. It never occurred to me that this was a problem for other people. What else was he meant to do? Piss himself?

That’s fair enough 🤷🏻‍♀️…

Why did OP even write post then though , if circumstances were he had no other choice ….

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