What do people in their 80s eat?

[Shoppingagain]

It might sound like a stupid question as I am sure everybody is different but I am wondering as I don’t think my elderly parents (80s) cook any more.

They used to heat things up in the microwave and use the oven for something simple they could put on a baking tray but it seems like too much trouble these days. They haven’t cooked anything like veg on the hob for a long time. They don’t make anything on toast even. So they must be living on snacks and things they can take from the fridge.

I do their shopping but they won’t accept any help in cooking or preparing food as they are very independent. I’m not even allowed to make a cup of tea!

Maybe I won’t feel like cooking in my 80s either so I am wondering what the ‘norm’ is and any ideas on what I can get them to eat that doesn’t involve much preparation.

My parents eat croissants, toast, fried breakfasts etc together mid morning. Dad will snack beforehand as he's up first.

Lunch may or may not happen depending on breakfast but crisps, sandwiches, sausage rolls etc or various snacks as they fancy

Dinner is pretty much anything. Roasts, stews, pizza, salad, barbecues, normal standard stuff.

Always up for fish and chips or a Chinese out or coming to mine for anything I feel like doing or that they request, remember or fancy (samosas, mwambe and bunny chow have been recent requests 🤣 )

My mother is 90 and says she hasn’t had as much appetite in the last 10 years or so.
She comes to our house and enjoys a roast with all the associated veg, but wouldn’t chop up cabbage for herself.
She likes smoked salmon, soups, egg on toast and Charlie Bigham ready meals.

My Dad and his partner just eat as normal.

Porridge and fruit/toast for breakfast.

Lunch is soup/sandwich type stuff.

Dinner...some sort of meat/potato/veg variant.

They like to eat out fairly often or get fish and chips too.

I don't think they're wildly adventurous in their tastes, but they definitely eat 'normal' cooked food.

Mine eat as normal, they cook every night, generally meat and 2-3 veg and potatoes or a Charlie Binghams or pasta. They have a roast on a weekend too and love a bbq in summer.

My mum is 99, nearly 100, and still eats a normal vegetable or salad heavy varied diet. She makes a roast on Sundays.

She liked to accompany ready meals with fresh greens and carrots. She enjoys high quality “live” yoghurts or tinned fruit and cream.

Mum is tiny but still enjoys her grub, and enjoys making it. Cooking is not for everyone so you either like it, right into old age, or you dont.

My mum likes lots of salads with slices of ham or quiche when the weather is warm.

Some nice crusty bread, tubs of sandwich filler, like egg mayo or prawn cocktail, a pre cooked roast chicken, pork pies with a bit of piccalilli, ready to eat sausage rolls, pastys etc. Sainsburys do a range of party food like mini egg bites and mini Cornish pasties that are easy. Lots of fruit. Apples, grapes and bananas are easy to eat, with fruit salads coming in ready prepared packs. Maybe some of those little porridge pots that you just pour boiling water into? Cereal bars?

The thing is, you could arrange meals on wheels for them, or try and convince them to use their microwave more, and in the winter, I’d definitely try, and I know that convenience food isn’t the healthiest, but they’ve reached a pretty good age and, if you can just avoid them developing diabetes or having a stroke, then I wouldn’t stress about it too much.

My mum is 84 and eats normal type dishes but smaller portions. Yesterday was porridge for breakfast, mid morning snack of toast, lunch was cheese and tomato sandwich, dinner was chicken, rice, vegetables with peppercorn sauce. I do most of the meal prep and will batch cook so always something in the freezer. We will often have main meal at lunchtime. Difficult for you to help your parents if they won't discuss it. Are they losing weight?

Wow to all the older people cooking full meals! My parents haven’t done that for a long time but they are not in good health and very frail. Good idea for them to eat more prepared fruit. My father will eat a prepared sandwich but my mother is fussy and will only eat certain things.

No they won’t discuss it at all or say they are struggling or ask for anything different to try. It’s just what I am picking up when I visit eg food that they haven’t eaten. I do say, What did you have for lunch? but I don’t get a straight answer. They do say they don’t have much appetite these days.

My parents live off ready meals toasties and things you can put in the oven. Breakfast is normal things like cereal toast, weekends is a cooked breakfast and a roast of some sort I think that's when they have vegetables.

Mine eat what they always have done. However my mum has a number of severe food intolerances which rule out a lot of things.
They eat very small quantities. I went to see them yesterday and took lunch - a quiche, ham, chips. They had a quarter of the quiche, one slice of ham and about 10 chips each. They were so full we had the individual trifle pots I'd taken two later before I went home. They have their main meal at lunchtime and a sandwhich in the evening.
I'd say they eat very simply, cereal and toast, ham, chicken, beans, soup, meat and two veg type meals. Fish and chips now and again. Big Aunt Bessie fans so they have to prep as little as possible. They like a banana but I see very little other fruit there. They like a bit of chocolate, a biscuit or a Tunncocks tea cake in the evening.
They were both very poorly the winter of 23/24 and lost huge amounts in weight which they've never really regained.
I was shocked about 18 months ago when I realised how little they ate but I've got used to it now.
They just don't have the appetite and as they are quite inactive now I suppose they just don't need it.

My dad's early 80s, we lost my beloved mum not long ago, she cooked most of their meals for 58 years, she baked, she created stunning dishes, so he's had a huge shock and a steep learning curve.
He stocks up once a week on good quality ready meals, he eats grilled salmon and lentils, he could do with a few more veggies but honestly, as long as he's eating something decent every day, I'm not concerned.
We have him over for lunch or dinner every week or so, his lovely neighbours invite him for Sunday dinner occasionally and one local lady brings him the most amazing home cooked Indian meals now and again. He's healthy and not on any meds, he's grief-stricken but he's doing okay, he still enjoys food, he's just not into cooking as such.

My mum used to cook "proper " meals but just don't think she can be bothered now,and the portions are so miniscule she would have food waste.

My mum has a boiled egg and toast for breakfast.

soup in the winter or a pre-prepared salad in the summer for lunch.

evening meals are usually cooked unless it is very very hot. Paella, grilled fish, she loves loves loves a good curry.

My Mum liked anything fresh with quality ingredients, which was difficult when she could no longer cook as all the delivery type srvices tended to be "school dinner" type rubbish. She also liked fresh bread and naice ham etc
I used to have fruit delivered to her regularly and take yoghurt over. I would also make stews and (mild) curry from scratch and drop them off to be reheated
I also sometimes had a bakery delivery sent for her.

At this sort of age, and on her own, my DM was a fan of Wiltshire Farm Foods. They seemed perfectly OK - I had the odd one when visiting. Otherwise I think it was mostly toast.
She did enjoy the individual fresh cream trifles I used to bring.

We suggested delivery meals like Wiltshire farm but they are too stingy to pay for them!

Older people, especially if they are very frail and don't move much, will have very little muscle mass and therefore a very low calorie requirement. This makes it even more important that the food they eat if the right kind of thing because they need to get all the necessary vitamins etc from small portions.

Will they take vitamin tablets?

Could you buy them some Cook meals? They are frozen ready meals but cooked as you would at home (ie no weird ingredients that you wouldn't have in your cupboards).

I guess they wouldn't entertain shakes or smoothies?

My mum is 87 and is a fantastic adventurous cook. She has always cooked very healthy food from scratch, she has never eaten a ready meal in her life. I wondered if she would change after my dad died a few years ago but no, she cooks proper food and has 3 good meals a day. She does get fuller quicker so eats smaller portions. She still hosts dinner parties for friends and family and as always the food is wonderful.
But she says that several of her friends who have been widowed don't cook as much as they used to, she is very disparaging about the ones who have ready meals.

I think it varies I had an aunt who was late 80s who really liked spicy food and would cook Thai or Indonesian. Others who have gone very bland and bitty lots of carbs, toast for breakfast, sandwich for lunch, small ready meal or chicken breast and veg for tea.

Some older folk struggle with digestion so that can be limiting too.

My DM is 84 and cooks/eats normals meals but smaller portions. She loves fruit and veg and would actually prioritise them over everything.

I think as they are frail they are finding it hard to stand at the oven or get things in and out.

Good idea to check they are taking vitamins.

Also reassuring to hear that they probably don’t need a lot of calories and yes they do like a trifle!

It's such a worry. My Dad basically neglected himself to death in the end - he was younger than your parents and he drank a lot so not the same situation but i remember the frustration of not being able to get him to do basic things to improve his health. It's like having a massive toddler but you have no real authority over them so you can't even compel them to do anything 😂

My DPs are late 80s & mid 90s.

Normal breakfast, cereal and toast.

Lunch is a tesco ready meal either in oven or microwave with mix veg from hob, followed by dessert such as banana, ice cream, steamed pudding in microwave. When DB or I visit we might make them something more complicated.

Afternoon tea is cake and a biscuit.

Evening meal is lighter sandwiches / soup / scrambled egg / salmon on toast

Mine were more like yours and didnt cook or bother much. We found things like quiche, cooked chicken, sausage rolls were great with a bit of salad or fruit. Lidl does mini pizzas which are nice zapped for a minute in the microwave but fine cold. My mum like prepared coleslaw which was good for some effortless veg. Essentially they had lots of picky teas.

As mentioned if they are inactive they may not need many calories.