Neighbour banging on window at 2yo playing in the garden!

[Ibytam]

This happened about 15 minutes ago. These neighbours aren’t very pleasant tbh, I have no idea if either of them work night shifts but it’s the only reason I can assume a person would bang on the window because of a child playing in their garden, I figure they must be sleeping.

Anyway, I wanted to know what others thought of this because my immediate reaction has been to get him inside, it made me feel super awkward and I’m the kind of person who’s overly polite. After speaking to my mum, who seemed furious, I now realise maybe that was the wrong thing to do. She says it’s midday and you can’t stop people from being in their garden during the daytime just because they work night shifts, something that is entirely their own choice.

I can understand if he was screaming overly loud or crying etc, or maybe even multiple children screaming. But he was just going around on his trike shouting ‘beep beep’ whilst giggling to himself. Our garden is also in an L shape and he was actually playing on the side that’s furthest away from their house too.

What does everybody else think about this?

They’re being unacceptable! But is it your own garden or a shared garden?

Id totally ignore them

I wouldn’t take him inside, it’s a nice sunny day and if you cave into this kind of behaviour they will only get worse xx

Oh yes totally our own garden!

Ridiculous- I'd have just waved and carried on like I didn't think anything of it.

We have a boy next door with some kind of special needs who really shrieks/ screams with excitement constantly when he plays in the garden but I would never dream of saying anything. They need to work it out for themselves.

No, I wouldn't bring him inside.

I would however sit out there for a while and distract him from shouting beep beep on constant repeat, that is a bit annoying for the neighbours.

Not a chance in hell would I have brought him inside. Kids will be kids and as long as you’re not letting him scream and shriek out there constantly all hours of the night and day, then you’re doing nothing wrong!

I would just ignore as long as the kid is just playing and not being overly noisy. It’s middle of the day so normal time to be awake and do daytime things.

It'll be the neighbours who are nuts. Ignore.
I have a mental neighbour too.

Nice way to shoehorn a misogynistic hate slur into a normal conversation there. 🙄

Definitely! I never let the kids out any earlier than 10am and never any later than 7pm! But I’ve always thought this to be quite reasonable tbh? They’re also never out all day either, even on super sunny days there’s large chunks of the day we’re either out the house or they’re inside.

Don't take him inside. It's good for children to be out in the fresh air. It's also late morning, so perfectly reasonable for your child to be out. Just smile and wave and turn away.

Def don’t bring him in! If they bang then just wave and smile at them. If they have an issue then they will have to use their words rather than banging on the window at a 2yo. If they are trying to sleep then they can invest in ear plugs and a white noise machine.

I do wish now that I’d responded differently. He must have banged a good 8 times and it didn’t register with me what I was actually hearing until it had stopped. I think we had only been out there 10-15 mins whilst I put the washing out. We hadn’t been out yet at all and were going to be coming in for naptime anyway. I’m frustrated with myself tbh, I know for next time though.

Let him go back out asap! Poor kid. Not only are they being unreasonable but you're teaching him that his perfectly reasonable needs/wants are less important than those of random others.

Anything between 9am and 6pm is fair game in my garden with my children.
I do stop screeching and shouting but chatting and playing is fine. We have bouncy castle so I limit the amount that is on during the day as the noise can be annoying after a while. We are only home weekends though so never in the week

Just because a neighbour might be a night worker and sleeping in the day doesn't mean they can dictate what you do in our own garden during what I class as normal business hours.

Last house we had neigbour like this no night shift.

I ended up in stupid position of taking kids out to park or out all the time - and neigbour still moaned - they blamed us for other kids nosies so we were out and they were still moaning. So stopped and they were no unhappier and it was a big easier for me.

I would suggest sitting out with child in garden and letting them play if there's an actual problem neigbour can knock on your door and explain.

If they make a habit of doing this, I would threaten to report them for harassing your child. Your mum is right - it's completely unacceptable. Not only because your child isn't doing anything wrong but because, if children are being annoying or noisy (especially when in this case, the "child" is essentially a large baby), it is entirely wrong to confront or intimidate the child, you should speak to the parent.

If I behaved aggressively to toddlers in public, I'd be arrested and rightly so.

My DS used to do the beep beep reversing noise and it was really annoying, even if you weren't trying to sleep!

For next time: "We are using our garden in a reasonable way. My child is entitled to play in his own garden during daytime hours. If you have any issues, I suggest you contact the council to make a noise complaint. Please stop intimidating us and buy some ear plugs instead."

I’d have given him a wave and carried on, ignore

If there was constant screaming, crying, then to I'd understand. However, some people just won't appreciate others should enjoy their own gardens. DH worked away a lot while DD was little and you could hear neighbours next door tut if DD and myself went and sat outside while we had a drink/snack or a meal. Glad they moved before she started having parties!

Oh I could for sure understand constant shouting and screaming but he was honestly just having fun out there. I could also understand if a dog was barking non stop too. You can’t win with some people, if kids aren’t outside they’re ’being brainwashed by the tv’ and when they are outside they’re being too loud.

"Nightshift is entirely their own choice"?That's a stupid comment!!
Anyway, I do ns and I just have to put up with neighbours noise. Summer is a nightmare cos every man just seems to love playing with their power tools in this season.
They have absolutely no right to bang their window at your wee one.
Let them play.