Neighbour banging on window at 2yo playing in the garden!

[Ibytam]

This happened about 15 minutes ago. These neighbours aren’t very pleasant tbh, I have no idea if either of them work night shifts but it’s the only reason I can assume a person would bang on the window because of a child playing in their garden, I figure they must be sleeping.

Anyway, I wanted to know what others thought of this because my immediate reaction has been to get him inside, it made me feel super awkward and I’m the kind of person who’s overly polite. After speaking to my mum, who seemed furious, I now realise maybe that was the wrong thing to do. She says it’s midday and you can’t stop people from being in their garden during the daytime just because they work night shifts, something that is entirely their own choice.

I can understand if he was screaming overly loud or crying etc, or maybe even multiple children screaming. But he was just going around on his trike shouting ‘beep beep’ whilst giggling to himself. Our garden is also in an L shape and he was actually playing on the side that’s furthest away from their house too.

What does everybody else think about this?

Anyone this bothered by normal noise needs to consider this when choosing a place to live. Tiny children shouldn’t be expected to play in silence just because some weirdo didn’t realise that you do indeed get noise on a housing estate.

How often and over what period of time did he shout "beep beep"?

Conversely, if your kid decideds to go in the garden and shout "beep beep" at the top of their lungs every ten seconds for half an hour, you might think about telling them to tone it down a bit even before anyone bangs on a window. Hard to say what happened here.

Definitely don't entertain them for one second OP. Let your son enjoy the nice weather. Making noise is all part of imaginative play, it's totally developmentally normal. My neighbours run a business from home (in a garden office). They are absolutely lovely and no issues but we are in a suburban estate of semi detached houses not an industrial estate so if for example they said my DC needed to not play on the trampoline or whatever during their working day I would just laugh at them and tell my DC to carry on.

Only answer to people like this is “call the council and report us if you have a problem - see what they have to say”

He wouldn't have banged angrily on the window at a man. Guarantee that.

Think of it from the perspective of a patient being cared for by a doctor or nurse on a night shift who has not slept due a child constantly making noises outside their window. You have the right to make reasonable noise in your garden but as a neighbour who has been in a similar situation, I would be grateful if you took your child to the park/somewhere else to play if the noise was keeping me awake. Night shift workers are sleep-deprived as it is and they are often essential workers. The noise of other people's children is irritating at the best of times, particularly when you are trying to sleep. Would you want to receive life-saving surgery by someone who has been kept up all day?

I work shifts including nights and have invested in a good set of ear plugs that block out most things. I think if you live in a terrace or flats it is just good manners not to blare music or scream at each other but a child playing or crying isn't in that league.
My only caveat is that we used to have a neighbour who bounced a ball on the hard ground or wall for hours. That was really annoying but even then I wouldn't bang on the window.

We were out there all in all for maybe 15 mins and the ‘beep beep’ was happening no longer than 3-5 minutes tbh. I also will add he wasn’t shouting it, just saying it a bit louder than normal as he’s a 2yo in the garden having fun? 😂🤷🏻‍♀️

I had a male neighbour who started off similar.

My DP who is a man spoke to him.

Neighbour then escalated.

Needless to say in our case the neighbour found out that you don't harass a small child especially if you are a tenant.

Funny thing is children grow and learn to play quieter.

I still don’t think this warrants banging on the window very aggressively imo. I bought this house because it has a lovely garden, I’m not
keeping my children in on a beautiful, warm sunny day. I’d perhaps have some
sympathy if he were to come and speak to me like an adult about it. Also wouldn’t allow my kids to scream, cry or shout but we are talking about a louder than average ‘beep beep’ and some giggles for 3 mins, maybe 5 maximum. If we were out all hours being loud constantly I definitely could understand as it could be seen as unreasonable. But honestly we already ARE out at the park daily, doing two school runs, going out to soft plays, groups, visiting friends etc. it was 5 minutes?

FFS have we really become such an antisocial and child-hating country that we're begrudging the sound of a 2 year old literally playing? It doesn't fucking matter how many times he says beepbeep. He's playing in his own garden at a normal volume. The neighbours are being vile and should be ignored.

You can let your son out to play during the day when they are trying to sleep. They can play music loudly at just the time that you want to put your children to bed. Be careful what you bring on yourself if you are in a semi with a shared bedroom wall

You're right, nobody in the history of the world has ever thought to say to their child "Could you play a little bit quieter? No need to yell out every five seconds." If we started doing that, then society would collapse. I don't know what I was thinking of.

What happened here was my son was saying ‘beep beep’ over the course of 3-5 mins whilst giggling to himself riding his trike and the neighbour banged on the window full force 6-8 times. That is exactly what happened. He didn’t ask us to ‘tone it down’ beforehand, he’s also never, ever moaned about noise before. It’s not like I know he is sleeping and I’m blaring music intentionally during those hours.

Would you want to receive life-saving surgery by someone who has been kept up all day?

This is a ridiculous argument. By that reckoning, should we all stay indoors all the time and not live our lives just in case we happen to disturb a surgeon who works on night shifts?

We’re aren’t in a semi and their garden is at the back of ours.

Thank you!! 🙏🏻🙏🏻

The child is TWO YEARS OLD.

You sound like the type who asks their neighbours to stop their 7 week old baby to stop crying because it is keeping you awake. d

I love hearing children playing outside.

Give me that over: barking dogs, leaf blowers, radios that you can't quite hear, wind chimes & banging gates any day. Oh and the chap round the back who spent the whole of a bank holiday banging in anti pigeon spikes along their fence.

OP, they really could have spoken to you if they were upset about something.
Can you talk to them now? Please don't bow down and keep your child inside.

I’d either ignore or tell them to fuck off tbh.
your garden to do what you wish.
I most certainly wouldn’t be taking my child indoors I’m with your mum it’s midday and not unreasonable .
Alovely sunny day too-do not pander to this or it will be never ending

Were they banging because of the child or was there an act in the garden or a seagull eating food put out for sparrows and robins etc?

Your fence must be very low for them to see in or were they upstairs?

Sounds like you’re considerate and reasonable. He wasn’t making too much noise either. Screaming, shrieking, whining etc would be annoying, but it doesn’t sound even close to that.

Get a big gazebo too to block their view

I worked nights for a long time. You can't stop children from playing out in the middle of the day! Let your 2 year old play to his hearts content and sod the miserable neighbours. If they do work nights they can wear ever plugs like the rest of us.