So how do I live in the female gender?

[Definitelynamechanged123]

There are 8834 people in the UK who have a Gender Recognition Certificate.
I am one of them.

To get it, I had to show evidence of transition, surgery etc. Lots of hoops

I also had to swear a Statutory Declaration. I had to go to a Magistrates Court and swear a legal declaration in front of a magistrate. It was all very formal.

I had to swear this:

" have lived as a (insert ‘male’ or ‘female’ as appropriate)
throughout the period of years before the date of this statutory
declaration and I intend to live in that gender until death."

This declaration is legally binding. Apparently if I don't follow this, I can be done for perjury.

So...how do I live as a female and live in that gender until death - I have sworn to do this in front of a magistrate.

I was very surprised that so few trans people have Gender Recognition Certificates.

This is the wrong advice

Completely different thread and I’m sure you’ll agree this one has been done to death on MNthreads
But then I’m sure you know, of course, that accessible toilets ie those that accommodate disabled people are also there to accommodate all other people too. They provide everything that a disabled person needs but are not for the exclusive use of a disabled person.
They are for all
Their number is included in calculations for provision in public buildings
Building regs states this very clearly
There is no law against anyone using the facility
It is not the same as a parking space
No blue badge required

They are not and have never been for the exclusive use of disabled people and were only and are only included so that everyone has access to a facility.

You present as female gender but without infringing women's rights/single sex spaces that are there to protect women due to the inherent physical vulnerabilities that come with being born & growing up female, that women cannot choose to escape.

You campaign for third spaces or cubicle toilets, instead of demanding that women & girls open up their safe spaces or put themselves at risk.

You respect that women only short lists are there to right imbalances that have lasted millennia.

You demand respect and equality for transpeople in their own right, without taking it away from others.

There are more and more cubicle toilets and changing rooms all the time, support that trend as a means of giving everyone a safe option.

You might be different but you are not a woman and the sooner you get to grips with that, the better it will be for you and for us.

Reconcile yourself to the fact that you cannot be anything that you want to be, any more than you can live on the moon. You've been sold a pup and if you think anything of women or of yourself, stop saying that you are a woman.

You aren't.

Learn to take "No" as an answer.

@MrsDuskTilldawn2point0 - that's blatantly untrue. When compared to the rest of the male prison population, trans-identifying prisoners are hugely more likely to be sex offenders.

Men are more likely to be assaulted than they are to assault, regardless of whether they hae a trans identity or not. This because the majority of men aren't violent offenders, and those who are violent tend to attack multiple people.

However, violent people are vastly more likely to be men than women. That's one of the principle reasons that we segregate some things by sex.

Op, why don’t you be the male you want to? You don’t need to fit into any stereotype. You ARE male, so live the best version of yourself!

I’m shocked OP that you need to even ask this

If you have a GRC surely you feel female naturally.
Women don’t need to try being what they are….they just are!

At one time they certainly were just for the disabled - they were labelled disabled toilets. Nobody asked disabled people about the change to accessible toilets - just ask anyone with a leaky stoma bag, or an incontinent wheelchair user if they’re happy to wait in a queue and risk having an accident for someone who could just as easily use a standard toilet. Considering the nature of the objection to trans women using womens facilities, it’s offensive in the extreme to suggest that it’s OK for disabled people to be put at risk.

That's not how it is at all. Transwomen who have transitioned and have been using hormones for long enough pass as bio women just fine when using women's loos and changing rooms. OP doesn't even have a penis anymore.

This drumbeat - about even fully transitioned trans women without a penis and balls not being allowed to use women's loos - has to stop. You really think that a bad actor would cut off their penis and take hormones that totally transform the look of their bodies just to be in women's spaces - in which most have cubicles anyway? Come off it.

It's nothing but hate to tell a fully transitioned TW to stay out of female loos.

Going back a bit @Definitelynamechanged123 before you had surgery...what did you hope to achieve with surgery?

Did you foresee that you could be swapping one set of problems for another?

What was so terrible about being male?

How did you 'feel' you were a woman? Because never having been a woman how did you know what that was going to be like?

There are men who have a strong feminine side but they acknowledge that and live as men. Likewise there are women who are more 'masculine.
Neither of these are necessarily gay, either.

If you feel every cell in your body is female, are you therefore attracted to men?
And how does that differ from being a man and gay?

That is because the judge is using the preferred pronouns of a trans identifying man.
as a matter of law a woman cannot carry out the act of rape which requires a penis by definition.

By law and in the Building Regs they are, and always have been, designed to give all the facilities ( grab bars, wheelchair turning space, lower hung whbs for example ) for a disabled persons needs.
Thats it.
They have never been exclusive
Ever!

But they are still men. Not having the appendages of men doesn't make them a woman. Their sex is a man.

If you're saying that men who've had surgery don't look like men any more and therefore can use women's loos, that madness. Because they do look like men, still.

That's what the law now says, thankfully.

What do you mean 'most women's loos have cubicles'
Which women's loos don't?

The cubicles don't usually have floor to ceiling doors.
Changing rooms often have a flimsy curtain.

Sorry to correct you but at one time they most certainly were exclusively for the use of disabled people - who were never consulted on the change to accessible toilets. What is the bloody point of having a single toilet which a wheelchair user or someone with a stoma or bowel condition may need to access urgently if you’re going to allow the world and his wife to use it under the term ‘accessible’?

You’re still a man, so keep dreaming and deluding yourself that you’re not.

How would I know either way if they have had all the surgery or not? Do they need to wear a badge?

Just read the last part of your post as missed it first time.

Accessible Toilets have always been mixed sex as well. That’s why families use them. ie dad with female daughters etc.
It’s always been this way.
Appreciate A lot of people don’t know they can use accessible toilets

Wrong. They have only been accessible toilets since the Equality Act 2010. Before that they were disabled toilets and exclusively for the use of disabled people.

Not disputing that they have always been mixed sex. At all. But the change from disabled toilet to accessible toilets was as a result of the Equality Act 2010.

Honestly reading what you have written makes me feel sorry for you. I can empathise with your struggle to find a safe space to use the toilet and with the fact you were bullied as a child and the struggles you had with your identity before you transitioned and I hope that there is a space for you one day and that you are happier now but what pisses me off is you pretending that you don’t know what a woman is.
Why are woman being asked by men to define what they are? No one makes a man define what he is. We are women, we are all different but we are natural born woman to the core and we know and feel what we are every day of our lives without explanation and without trying, you don’t know you are and that is the difference.

Gosh people here seem to be so ignorant sometimes… I don’t think she is asking: how do I behave to be considered a woman? I think she asks: now that we have had this ruling, what previously declared me as a woman (the GRC), currently won’t anymore. Meaning that now instead of you being put in a female ward in a hospital, you might be put on a mens ward, you might have to go into men’s toilets / dressing rooms etc. Which of course is humiliating for you (and possibly scary), especially if you have had surgery and look like a woman. I can’t imagine what it must be like to be woman born as a man, go through years of stress, therapy, surgery and then a formal procedure, look like a woman, finally feel like you can be your true self, and then the government legally sends you back into mens dressing rooms…

I also did some maths yesterday.. 0.56% of the population is trans, so 0.26% of the population used to be a man and now identifies as a woman. Let’s assume all these anti trans people are right, and there are some bad trans people out there (let’s say 10% of the trans population.. which is a high number, it’s more likely 1% or less).

The UK female population is 34 million people. Of that population there are 8,840 trans people with bad intentions towards women (assuming 10%, but its more likely 884 people). In comparison, 1 in 4 women get sexually assaulted / raped in the UK in their lifetime, from which the vast majority by men (that’s 8.5 million sexual assaults - that’s 1000 x as many as there are trans women).

Now let’s assume you go into a public toilet. I’d estimate that a person goes into a public toilet twice a week (104 times a year). So trans women with bad intensions account for 919K public toilet visits a year. The female population toilet visits is three billion, five hundred thirty-six million per year.

For you to get assaulted by a trans woman into a public toilet, you need to wait in this public toilet until 3,848 women have passed through with you in that room. And if my 1% of population is accurate, 38,480 women need to have passed through to catch 1 trans woman with bad intentions. And then you need to be lucky enough that this person targets you. Because if you assume they only assault people once a year, you’d have to sit in that busy airport toilet for your whole life and never leave for something to happen to you.

in summary: this is a NON ISSUE that people need to STFU about.

We now have caused misery for tens of thousands of people who already live a difficult life for a non-existing threat. Well done.

He is.

They are called accessible toilets and say 'not all disabilities are obvious.'

No one can police them to the extent you're saying. I don't agree that trans people should use them. But at the same time, the idea you need to be in a wheelchair or have a mobility issue to use them is wrong too.

The world and his wife is an exaggeration- there are evidently 8K people with a GRC- out of a population of over 65 million.

Well I’m a relatively old architect and I’ve been designing public buildings all of my professional life.
Ever since they were a requirement they have been mixed sex accessible toilets
Ever since they were introduced architects have always calculated the required number including disabled toilets as mixed and for all
Ever since they were introduced as a requirement in Building Regs they have never been exclusively for disabled people, just big enough to accommodate them. Nothing more. Ever
It is what it is.

PS. There was never a change in who could use them just a change in the name as it was considered unacceptable to call a toilet disabled. Disabled people didn’t like the word and found Accessible ‘friendlier’

I've not bothered to read all his posts.