Need advice on clothes I want returned to me

[Pjsandpringles]

I was on holiday last month and during my trip I got friendly with someone. When I left the hotel I realised I had left a few items of clothing in my hotel room. I messaged my "friend" to tell her how stupid I had been and also messaged the hotel to arrange to have them sent back to me. She offered to collect them and send them when she got back. I thought this would be easier since they would be in the same country and I'd get them quicker.

It's now a month later and she still hasn't sent them and isn't responding to my messages. Any advice on what I should do?

You have no proof she even has them! And what do her employers have to do with it??

You just have to suck it up that it was your own fault for leaving several items behind!

if she hadn't offered to get them then the hotel would have sent them to me and I would have them back by now.

They probably wouldn’t tbh.
I’ve worked in hotels and If they did this for every guest that left something they’d be forking out ££££’s each year returning stuff, not to mention the inconvenience of treking to the post office. They’d likely have told you’d they’d sent them but then just not bothered.

But I do have proof. Ok obviously her employers probably wouldn't care.
Im just frustrated and pissed off that I was taken for an idiot. Clearly being a decent person isn't the norm. Lesson learnt but I will be taking it further.

They said they would and they wouldn't be out of pocket. I obviously would have paid for it

Have you checked Vinted?

This is exactly what Small Claims is for. As long as you have evidence ( text messages, proof of value of items) you can put in a claim. Of course there is no guarantee of a win, but if you do the other party also has to pay costs.

How has communication been otherwise? Has she texted a lot?
How much time did you spend with her?

Most people would be really embarrassed for a friend to know they were a thief.

Have you tried ringing?

Maybe a final message saying "hey, I'll arrange an evri collection. Let me know when suits. My friends are urging me to file with small claims court!! Obviously I've told them you're not a thief and are probably just busy"

We met on my first night there. We were both travelling solo and basically spent the full week doing stuff together. Communication was fine until I asked if she had managed to send my stuff.
Thank you for your response. I'll try sending that message

Tbh I think it's probably more likely that she's just not got round to posting them yet and she's embarrassed.

I'd say in general if you leave things behind on holiday, you're unlikely to get them back. It's a hassle people can do without and never high on the priority list. Whilst it's frustrating that this woman offered but has since not followed through for whatever reason, I think you need to chalk it up to experience.

You actually forgot a £1000 worth of clothes? 😱

I agree with this. Hotels just don't have the manpower to offer this as a service to departed guests.

I feel your pain @Pjsandpringles .I left a comb in my hotel room in 2003.Every day, I pine for my comb. I'd had it 18 years.
Maybe you should try counselling.

I think @newkettleandtoaster 's message is a really good idea as a last informal resort. If it doesn't produce a response, write a "Letter before Action" to her laying out the facts (no emotion) of the case, including detailing the evidence you have. List the value of each of the four items (with copies of the receipts if you still have them) plus your costs (filing and hearing costs) plus statutory interest at 8%. LBAs are usually enough to scare the wits out of the recipient (especially when she sees that ignoring you will cost her £1k+) and should get you your items back unless she's really stupid or, as a pp has suggested, she's sold your clothes. If you do have to take her to small claims court, I do hope she realises that when you get a judgment against her she will have a CCJ recorded on her credit file which will affect her ability to get credit. And I'm not sure how her current or future employers would view a CCJ that remains unsatisfied - at the very least it indicates wrong-doing and poor judgement on her part - but I wouldn't contact them about it directly as it's a private matter at this stage (but would become a matter of public record if you take her to court).

I’m a bit bewildered at the arsey responses you’re getting here, OP.
Yes, you made a mistake by leaving things behind, and a further mistake by trusting someone you didn’t know too well, but Christ on a bike someone has your stuff and isn’t returning it or responding to your messages!
If you have irrefutable proof that she collected them, then small claims would be the way to go, although I’d mention it to her first, as the threat of it may be enough to provoke the appropriate response.

This is shitty behaviour for sure. Tell her that you can advance the postal fee if she wants to but that you don't want to wait any longer and if she doesn't send the clothes you will have to drive and get them yourself. And you will be waiting for her outside the school she works in.

Have you checked on Vinted?

I get why you're annoyed but I think you're on a hiding to nothing.

You left them behind, you 'lost' them and have no real proof that she has them. She may have left them behind also.

I think you need to accept your mistake.

I agree. They're making light of or excusing the actions of a thief. Makes you wonder about their moral compasses. 🙄

This is what happens when people try to save money and ask friends to collect things, etc. You should have paid the hotel to post them.

If it's a 5 hour drive (each way?) then work out your hourly cost and fuel costs
I bet that's more than £1000
And what if you drive there and she's either not in or still doesn't give them to you?
That's another load of money out of pocket
Accept she's stolen them (report to the police if you wish) and if they ever turn up treat it as a huge bonus

Claim it on your holiday insurance.

Maybe she should contact your employer and advise how forgetful you are? Would they be interested in such nonsense? No, I doubt they would!

Asking some random person you met on holiday to go to the hotel and get £1000k worth of clothes for you?

Giggle. 1000K of clothes is 1000,000 quid!

It's nice to see mumsnet hasn't changed in 20 years. Always good to have a reminder why I avoided it.

Thank you to those who were helpful I appreciate it. For the rest I want to thank you too for reminding me that people are actually generally awful and best to be avoided.