Anyone else awake?

[Ironironiron]

Is so, why? I'm awake as my DH told me he wanted us to go our separate ways tonight and so I can't sleep. Have started a thread already so don't really want to bore everyone by going over it again.
Just wanted to chat.

OMG. Why are they so bloody cruel? I'm so sorry......
What will do? Does he want you to end it so that he doesn't look bad? I guess now you're hanging around waiting for him to say it's over but at the same time don't want to hear those words.
Before tonight if a friend had told me what you just said then I'd have said to say "well off you trotvtjen" but it's harder when you're actually in the situation.
I cried a little bit earlier on in the evening but now I can't even so that. At least you're letting it out which is much healthier.

He's making it easy for you in some ways with his behaviour to want to go but sounds like he's also worn you down with it.

Just...bloody hell! I'm angry on your behalf.

I'm sorry OP. I saw your other thread too, not surprised you're awake. I like the ice cream advice from a previous poster - but I just love ice cream. Understandable if you can't stomach it.

I'm up with a baby whose eyes pop open the minute you put her in her moses basket 😜

Thank you. Yes I love ice cream too so maybe that'll be my go to for a while until I'm sick of it and prob won't ever want to eat it again as it'll remind me of a shitbtime in my life!

I remember my first did that! As soon as I broke contact with their body no matter how careful I was they'd wake up! They look like they're so deep in sleep too. I don't have any advice I'm sorry. It got better eventually so don't give up hope. You'll get there!

I'm going to look like a panda tomorrow aren't I?
That's a good look.
Well why do I care anyway?.....

OP

I've read a bit of your other thread just now

Try and hold onto the fact that deep down you knew it wasn't working as well as it could

Obviously you're heartbroken at the moment

But sometimes we miss the idea of being with someone rather than the person themselves

And when you've been with someone for a long time it is hard to let go

It's no one fault really it just wasn't working out like it used to.

It will take time to get your head around it.

You might split up and get back together again or move on in different directions

Grief comes in stages and you'll get through this stage eventually

I become quite catatonic when I'm feeling like this but probably the best thing is to go out and keep busy

It might help if you imagine what advice you'd give to someone in your predicament what would you be advising them

My DS was like this

I ended up moulding a huge sofa cushion I had into what was my chest shape and lying him gently on that and it only bloody worked

It's so weird because he's 19 and over 6 ft now but I still vaguely remember those first months with him.

Catatonic is how I become. I can't focus even though I too know I should keep busy. I keep trying to think it's for the best.

I can't think in that way that we'll get back together as it will drive me insane with hope. I think the best thing is to just accept its over.

That's all good advice though. Thank you. I think you're mostly spot on

Total parental nutrition, basically it looks likes baby milk but is very expensive and im tube fed.
I'm very grateful to still be knocking around.
I, and you will have amazing days yet to come, ones you can't even imagine yet. I'm imminently about to become a grandparent. I'm pathetically excited for that and nervous too. x

This is outing, but fuck it....

I was adopted, and she was my natural birth mother. We saw each other for the first time 25 years ago tomorrow.....actually she'd already seen me, but you know what I mean.

My mom was one of those women that were trapped into giving their child up for adoption at six weeks old back in the 60s....a typical Long Lost Family story.

I cannot imagine what it must be like to give your child away when you don't want to. The pain, suffering and mental anxiety involved doesn't bear thinking about.

She was the strongest woman I know to go through this. She was so lovely, always smiling and grateful for everything she had.

I always said that a part of me was missing until 25 years ago. I found that part, but now she's gone.

I'm broken.....

RIP Mom

That's fantastic! It prob is s but nerve wracking but it'll be OK. Focus on the excitement.

Yes we'll both be OK. You've come through a tough time and I'll get through this.

@secretrugbyfan wow that's full on. Amazing though that you got to know each other. Not like the heartbreaking Philomena story where they were kept from each other.

You both sound like wonderful people I'm so glad you had so many years together

I'm awake, but it's only midnight here. I'm watching my cat and my rat look at each other.

You will but you're clearly not stupid so know that won't be tomorrow. I wouldn't put up with the snoring anymore though, that's for sure!
Too outing and not my tale to tell, but DGD is a miracle already. She is amzing and hasn't even taken a breath yet.
I'm going for a bath, can't decide whether to get up. Take care. He doesn't deserve to take your happiness for long. x

That's tough "Secret" but at least you got to meet her. Some people never do so try to hang onto that.

You've had 25 years of memories, of knowing her and she knowing you. I bet that was the best day ever for her(and you) reconnecting with you all that time ago.

The Long Lost stories don't always end well esp when the parent has already gone. I remember one story in particular where someone found her birth mum but she spoke a different language and no English at all! That was sad. How do you reconnect there?

Yours didn't end badly in that you got the chance to know her properly. I know it must be raw at the moment but those memories will most likely pop into your head here and there over the coming years and you'll smile to yourself.

Take care of yourself. 💐

I'm going to get up in a bit and have a cup of tea

My 5 week old has been doing the 4am grunts

I'm letting her sleep on my chest peacefully whilst I scroll

My partner has rolled over and carried on sleeping. We had an argument last night about sleep, the fact he is getting a lot more than me but is going around being grumpy and selfish. It really fucks me off. Then when I tell him how cross I am and how unreasonable he's being, he's trying to turn it back round on me and being a complete dickhead. This is our second child so we've done all this before and I did it all then too. Makes me want to leave him to be honest.

If I'm doing all the slog anyway, it makes no bones to me and it'll be his loss in the long run.

So sorry to hear you're going through this OP. I haven't seen your other thread so don't know so the details but your world must feel like it's been turned on its head.

I'm awake because I can't bloody breathe properly when I lie down - my nose gets slightly blocked sometimes and breathing through it makes the most annoying whistling sound which fills me with a rage that I can't even begin to describe. So after putting vicks on it (which usually does a pretty good job of sorting it out, but not this time) and spending about two hours trying to breathe and get back to sleep, I eventually jumped out of bed in pure temper and am now sitting on the couch with a cup of tea and feeling much calmer. I won't bother even trying to go back to bed.

I read your other thread and i am sorry but it does sound like you could do so much better

He is cold and controlling.
and old and abit ugly 😂
and you look young and your great in bed.

Good for you… F him…
Take time for yourself, it will be spring soon and your have the sun on your face, birds chirping and beautiful flowers blooming and you will feel SO much better…. Hugs!!

That sounds tough and annoying! How rotten.
Hope you're feeling better soon.
I think I might as well give up too. Everytime I lay down my heart races.
I can't even go down and out the kettle on as it'll wake him up!

Although maybe I should....

Oh and im awake cause partner is drunk and being a dick. its nearly 6am and he is yet to get into bed !

First time iv seen him like this, in 10 years being together.
I just hope he doesnt try to come down the stairs again. Because i think he may fall
🤬😡😤

Wake him up - Its his fault you are still awake

I'm feeling fine, it's not a cold or anything, just my nasal passages seem slightly narrow.

Definitely join me for a cup of tea. So what if it wakes him?!

My dick of a Drunk partner has now gone out for a cigarette. When he only came in 20 minutes ago, Its icy out there and -2.
If he falls over i wont be able to pick him

Why are men so god damn annoying!!!!

I'm having one now- fuck it I thought. I'd run out of water and was desperately thirsty. So thinking my mug with yours! Cheers!