Herpes Medication found in my husbands bag

[countrysidefields]

I have just found empty packets of tablets from an online pharmacy box dated 17th dec 2024 for anciclovir in my husbands laptop bag.
All the empty packets and packing was also in the box, like it was hidden in there.
When I googled that medication it's used for genital herpes. He doesn't and never has had cold sores.
I am obviously thinking the worst seeing how it was hidden away. Please don't judge me, I wasn't actually looking on purposes, I happened to come across it.
Am I right to be assuming the worst?

I am sorry, countrysidefields.

Don't sit on this long, speak to him as soon as possible, be direct and specific, eg, "Why do you have medication for genital herpes?". You'll know by his face.

Then you need to talk to each other seriously.

Good luck.

As I can't imagine him hiding a case of shingles, the most innocent explanation would be that he was exposed long before you got together and is just now having his first outbreak of symptoms (though tbh, I have no idea if it could be dormant for that long). Even that would be a problem, as this would obviously affect you, too, so he shouldn't be keeping it a secret.

I'm afraid I'd expect the worst. I hope he'll be honest when you talk to him about it.

Hmm I would be suspicious too but would it not be a lot more embarrassing to have to upload photos to Superdrug than just go to his own dr or sexual health clinic

Something you should do with some urgency is book yourself in for STI testing.

You can get herpes from oral sex with your long term partner too. Happened to me after years of marriage.

Thank you Snapncrackle. I know it doesn't make this any less suspicious but I think its important to flag so the OP and other posters know acyclovir from superdrug don't always = genital herpes, and so that once she speaks to her husband the OP knows if she has questions on the superdrug process she has people on here who are familiar with it.

Hmm it doesn’t look good. Is he secretive with his phone or does he leave it laying around the house?

Think it's more likely not to be cold sores OP as he'd have no reason to hide them.

It may be that he's had herpes & managed it himself maybe since even before you got together & kept it hidden from you due to shame?

Although I don't know how long you've been together. Some people only get v infrequent flare ups so it's possible he could have gone years since a prior flare up & therefore could have been easy to manage/conceal.

Again unlikely but....

Good luck

Same as previous posters have said, it is the medication for shingles but just completing my third week of having shingles, there is no way you could hide it from someone you live with.

I just cannot see him having had shingles. It must be a different form of the herpes virus and the secrecy is weird

Is that not what threads are about? To ask advice etc.
what a dick

Sorry OP but unless you have specific herpes blisters there are no valid tests for herpes.
Please don't waste your money on private tests as they won't give you any information.

I think herpes can lay dormant for many years until a flare up, so he may have had it a very long time and only just had a flare up that warranted medication and he may have hidden it because he was embarrassed

I wouldn’t think the worst at the moment

They’re also used for immune suppressed people for like flu etc too

I have an autoimmune condition and part of my symptoms is recurrent HSV outbreaks. I have never had genital herpes but get HSV breakouts on my skin, have had multiple outbreaks of shingles. I take 400mg aciclover twice a day as a preventative dose, and change the frequency when i have a live outbreak.

I would be fucking livid if my partner assumed I had been unfaithful or contracted an STD with no evidence other than these pills. If he's not actually given you reason to assume he's cheating /contracted a STD, I think this is really offensive.

And would you be hiding your meds from a long time partner, never ever mentioning you had this condition?

Do you really think that the partner of 26 years would be unreasonable to think that he's hiding an affair rather than an autoimmune condition YouBelongWithMe?

And that he receives the prescription for his secret autoimmune disorder in three weekly increments from a high street pharmacy instead of the GP?

We can agree to disagree

But I don't understand why the assumption is that he has an STD/been unfaithful if there was no suspicion beforehand. Surely if he's given no indication of that, the next step is a question to support his health, not jumping to the idea that he's contracted an STD whilst cheating.

I have been married for nearly 20yrs. My marriage is very strong. Would my husband be able to explain why I was on aciclover without reminding/explaining? Probably not. I take a lot of medication and he probably glazes over some of it. Would he assume I was cheating? Absolutely not.

Maybe there's more to this relationship which makes the OP doubt her husband though.

Really? Did your medical centre said so?
A while ago (when I was young so over a decade ago) nhs offered sti tests to everyone as these infections can stay dormant and not present symptoms for a long time.
Might be worth contacting sexual health clinic.

Would my husband be able to explain why I was on aciclover without reminding/explaining? Probably not. I take a lot of medication and he probably glazes over some of it
Presumably he would guess it's medication somehow taken in relation to your autoimmune condition, and the condition is not something you've kept a secret from him?

if there was no suspicion beforehand
Granted the OP hasn't mentioned suspicions beforehand, but she has mentioned that they've been in a rut, their sex life has taken a significant dip, the medication is not something you would order online for a first occurrence unless somehow otherwise sure what you have and has been kept from her for a month. Most would say that's reasonable enough to have suspicions now.

If your partner of 26 years came to you fearing an affair, because they had come across medication used to treat herpes that you take for some other condition that you had deliberately kept secret I'd be hard pushed to think its fair you were livid.

It's possible he caught this before you got together and he's never told you. If he has a flare up and abstains for two weeks afterwards it's possible it hasn't passed to you. Lots of people live with it. If this is the case then the conversation is one of, why haven't you told me? And he might not have known how to tell you after the first few weeks or months.

However, if he's caught it more recently then obviously it's a different conversation.

What was the dosage? 400mg is used for herpes but I had 800mg for shingles. The heroes one is usually 3 x a day for 5 days so would have had a packet of 15 or so.

It can also lay dormant for years, so just because he's potentially had his first outbreak now doesn't mean he only just caught it, could have been a decade ago

Nhs tests don't test unless there is a blister.

That's what I said.