Only on Mumsnet...

[SushiSheep]

...have I heard the terms "norks", "tinkly laugh", "naice" bread/ham/area, CF (Cheeky Fucker), LTB (Leave the Bastard) and "get your ducks in a row" (when leaving the bastard!)

What are your 'Only on MN' things?

And they never use it correctly either.

Shit hot lawyer.

Oh I know it didn't originate on MN but it's the only place I hear it nowadays.

It makes me wonder if I'm missing out on some unique, specialised legal advice.

In my world it's just a local solicitor. Capable if a little slow. It's not Suits!

The weirdly formal speeches people are advised to make.

I can't think of specific examples. Hopefully you know what I mean.

"As you insist in continuously eroding my boundaries I will therefore no longer blah blah..."

Who talks like this? With their therefores and haughtiness.

I tried it once. The formal MN speak with my teenage daughter. Well! That fucking antagonised the situation! Talking at her like right-on bot. 😂

At least one supermarket, M&S I think, has this sign above the end fridge that's got a selection of the 3 for £8 deli packs in it.

Maybe the person in charge of fridge signage there is a Mumsnetter and this is her secret sign to us all?

Very common in business when talking about risk i.e. “the risk is vanishingly small”

‘That doesn’t work for me.’

That would never work for me! Daft IMO - I’d just say ‘Sorry, I can’t, too tied up,’ or whatever other plausible reason.

Pregnant woman accused of being ableist for hoping that her baby will be born healthy.

Only on mumsnet.

And ‘boils my piss’ - loathsome expression I’ve never read or heard anywhere else.

Balonz as a popular name for a boy

Only at parties with supersoakers..

And Pom Bears

I'm going to stop going there immediately! 😆😆

Obsession with logging everything with 111.
The indignity upon hearing the term Karen.

How ridiculous some ppl are wether its, if someone doesn't agree with them, it's hurt feelings or aggression or searching for details so they can pick holes in threads.

Yes! In the space of a few days on here not that long ago I saw terms like having a Paddy and child porn go by with very little remark but someone glibly used Karen as shorthand and the place went mad.

Frothing, fuming and boiled piss all over the place. 😂

Give your Head a wobble
Makes my Teeth itch

Both irritate the Hell out of Me

I have been on a couple of threads where we have actively challenged the term "Paddy" in that context, and why it's so offensive. "Child porn" is always corrected and, again, actively challenged.
Same with "Irish twins" (sic).
I'm glad that people are calling out misogynist and ageist terms such as "Karen".
I'd disagree that it's the term most complained about, though.

Agree with @therewasafishinthepercolator &@CarmelaBrunella The use of the word "ch*v/vy" never hear it in day to day parlance but on here it's used frequently.

No problem with it being called out - don't use it myself and get the issue with it - but its the (over) reaction it produces on here.

The other comments will get a handful of civilised 'That's actually quite offensive / we don't use that term" type comments whereas Karen makes people angry. They ignore the fact the OP is actually struggling with something and focus solely on that and it all gets a bit shitty.

That's my experience anyway.

It shouldn't be ignored, though.

The use of the word "ch*v/vy" never hear it in day to day parlance but on here it's used frequently.

My 11 year old daughter says it daily; an hour ago, she said her mates call her a chav for having a White Fox hoodie.

I had to correct her, it's charva, not chav. It's one of a number of Romany words in Newcastle dialect and I think it's got a different meaning to the Southern version. It's a low life opportunistic petty crook, with no manners.

Smoking dope on the Metro, gobbing phlegm at the bus stop, reaching through opened windows etc.

@SinnerBoy yes in the original context it was from Romany for boy child (&charva for a girl) , I used to be able to understand bits of Romany language from my childhood (farming) but not on here it's used as in spiteful way.

I read those threads just to laugh at some of the horrific suggestions 😂

It’s the scoffing and sneering at anyone who doesn’t like them that gets me.

’Oh you don’t want to look like an Amish widow on crack? Well, perhaps you’d prefer to fade into the background in a cheaper, much less interesting, polyester dress from Matalan’ sniffs

'That apparently everyone reverses onto their driveways… if you don’t you are a terrible driver 🤦‍♀️

(Since noticing this common refrain on MN I’ve paid particular attention to how people park on their own driveways. I would say c90% drive on and reverse off!)'

I was going to mention this earlier today-I'm often in a queue of traffic getting home to my 'main-road, near a junction' home so indicating left ( so the car driver behind thinks I'm going up to the junction) and then driving past the house in an attempt to then reverse back onto the driveway in the traffic would be an impossibility.
I drive onto my driveway as I can do so easily in the traffic then reverse out in the morning when it's easy and there's no traffic.